EXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXCELLENT!

Ever get that feeling that you’re being watched? That some weird creepy looking guy is staring at you through a hidden camera, or a telescope, or from right outside your window? NO?! Nevermind then. Move along. Don’t even bother that “READ MORE LINK”. I’d hate to bore you any further.

What? Some of you actually clicked it? Like for reals? Ummmm…crap….now I still have to keep writing. Ummmmm…uhhhhhhh….hmmmmmm. Ah yes. I can attempt to make up some random things to keep you thinking I am so S_M_R_T. That’s it. On we go.

Charles Montgomery Burns aka Mr. Burns. Some weird skeleton looking creepy old guy that lives in Springfield. No one really knows how old the crazy codger is, and he keeps telling us many different numbers. He must not want anyone to really know. That or he just keeps giving us random numbers because he has forgotten how old he is as well.

In the real world, a creepy old boney man like Mr. Burns, would’ve been put in the old folks home or the “nut house”. In Springfield, mainly due to his BILLIONS of dollars, he is allowed to do pretty much whatever the heck he wants to do. Even wander around town, high as a kite, and glowing.

Oh, I’m sorry…you only came for a boring list of tasks? All neat n tidy in a lil sectioned off box. TOO BAD!! MY POST!! MY WAY!! BRING ON THE PICTURES AND RAMBLING!!! ๐Ÿ˜›

As far as TSTO is concerned, he is kinda…well…boring. YES! I SAID BORING! Deal with it. ๐Ÿ˜› With so many other possibilities for him, I want more. For now, these are the tasks we are stuck with for Mr. Burns…

Now to bring him into the game in the first place, you need to be to level 11. During the level, you will be asked to build the Nuclear Power Plant. As soon as you place the Cooling Towers, Mr. Burns will be brought into your game as a playable character.

Ok. You got me. I suppose not ALL his tasks are boring. Some, I admit, do make me giggle. Lets break them down.

FIRE RANDOM EMPLOYEE: Mr. Burns heads off to his Plant for this task. It is a quick one. 45 seconds. He doesn’t like to waste anytime. Just in, “YOU’RE FIRED!”, and out again.You get a whole $3 and 1XP.

BRISK CONSTITUTIONAL: This one is a tad silly, but mainly for the faces he makes as he attempts to “jog” around town. It runs for 60 minutes, however I do not think he could’ve made it that whole time. Not unless he has a stunt double doing it for him. (He also has another 60 minute task with Smithers “exercising”, but that will be covered under Smithers tasks). Reward is $70 and 20XP.

READ FROM THE NECRONOMICON: HUH??!! I have no idea which one. Yes, I know there are several. Don’t look at me. You go look it up. You ARE online. Personally, I think it is his “code word” for another magazine. ๐Ÿ˜› Mr. Burns is back at the plant for this one too. Takes him 4 hours to read the thing. I doubt he is a speed reader, so I say a VERY short book. Reward of $175 and 45XP.

HIDE NUCLEAR WASTE:ย This one is a little silly, but again, only due to his facial reaction and “form” as he tosses the radioactive rods. I think so far the silliest I have seen is where it looks as though he is trying to toss it into the ocean, but fails miserably. He just can’t throw very well. This task lasts 8 hours, so a good one to put him on if you’re not gonna be round your game a while. Reward of $275 and 70XP.

RIDE THE FERRIS WHEEL:ย This particular task is locked up at first due to it is a Premium Task. A task in which you need a premium character and/or item to complete. In this case, you will have needed to purchase (120 donuts) the Ferris Wheel for Squidport. You also need to have Smithers free to ride with him. I wish I could say you can watch them go round n round. Sadly, no. The Ferris Wheel does have cool animation and is always going. This task, they just disappear into it. 10 hours worth of round n round n round n round n round. If you did spend donuts, you can earn $525 and 135XP on this one.

WALK THE HOUNDS: Now I gotta admit this one made me giggle the most when I first saw it in action. Mr. Burns body just flapping in the wind as the hounds dragged him round town. When they stop, his body looks broken up. I just laugh at it. Kinda like karma for all the times he has sent dogs on the rest of the town’s people. Mr. Burns gets dragged around for 12 giggling hours. With a reward of $420 and 100XP.

RUN THE PLANT: Does Mr. Burns every really “run the plant”? I mean REALLY?? I think he just goes there to get the chance to fire employees, yell at employees, torment employees, hold useless “mandatory meetings”, play God or is it the Devil to his employees, basically just making all of his employees utter existence a sad and pathetic one while at the plant. Why else would he hang around for 24 hours? Maybe for a reward of $600 and 150XP.

Just when you assumed we were done…WELL SIT DOWN!! Ooooh, I think I just channeled a lil Mr. Burns there. Excellent. ๐Ÿ™‚

Let me bring in my Misery box to stand on for this one (and yes, that is a better name for it…how many wooden fences have you got now?). A handful of the characters in TSTO have costumes or “Skins” if you will. This is kinda like a multiple personality. You can switch between each one and get a different list of tasks to do. That reminds me, maybe I should let one of my other 41 take over. NAH…on we go!

NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA FRUIT BAT MAN!

During the Month of March (14th-18th, 2013), if you were lucky to be playing the game you were given the chance to get Mr. Burns alter ego/skin Fruit Bat Man. It was to coincide with the new Simpsons TV Episode: “Dark Knight Court”. The skin was considered a Limited Premium Item, so you also had to hand over your hard earned precious donuts to get it. 90 donuts to be exact. Or if you didn’t have them due to you just joined the game (like a lot of Android users) then you had to purchase some donuts with your real life money.

You also received, completely free, the Fruit Bat Signal. It was just added automatically to your inventory box. You had only to place it in your town.

Once you completed his walk through, you were left with a handful of permanent tasks. I know, I KNOW…get on with the tasks. Picky picky picky.ย 

POSE IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR: As much as I would’ve liked to see Mr. Burns in all sorts of silly and distorted “poses”, EA chose to put this one in the Plant as well. ๐Ÿ™ The task runs for 60 minutes. You’re reward is $105 and 26XP.

FLY LIKE A DECREPIT SUPERHERO: Another giggling one. You get to watch for 4 hours while Mr. Burns attempts to take flight around town. It’s those expressions. Reward on this one, $260 and 70XP.

REHEARSE HEROIC ONE-LINERS: Gotta just use your imagination on this one as he is at the Plant again for 8 Hours. I myself can envision poor Mr. Smithers having to endure each and every one of his “golden lines”. Reward… $420 and 105XP

PRACTICE PUNCHING OUT A CROOK: Again Mr. Burns is outside and again he is making me laugh at his pathetic attempts to do things. This one lasts for a full 12 hours. At the end you will get $600 and 150XP.

SOOTH HIS WELTS AND BRUISES: Now he does not go to the Plant for this, instead this is ONLY time on a permanent task so far that he actually uses his Manor. In order to actually use this task, you first had to reach level 25 and purchase the Burns Manor . Poor lil guy must be in tears n pain to be sitting at home wallowing for 24 hours. That or he is just playing round with his billions of dollars. Your dollars earned on this one $1000 225XP.

A now for a little extra something…

Just so you know, many automatically assume the Burns Monster is also a skin for Mr. Burns. It is not. It is actually a Limited Time Character from the Halloween 2012 event. The Monster could be purchased with 300 candies/treats (currency you earned and spent for the event). Now they included it with the 2013 Halloween event for 25 donuts. ย It really doesn’t do much. Only thing is a lil maniacal laugh and tongue lashing when you tap on it while it wanders around town.

Well I think we all aged enough years listening to all this dribble on Mr. Burns tasks. I feel almost as old as him now. Now get outta here and get to tap tap tapping. ๐Ÿ™‚

***Bunny***

“a special lil thanks to my domestic Fuzzball for the assist on this one. :)“

5 thoughts on “EXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXCELLENT!

  1. After completing the 2016 Heretic Homer event, there’s a new 60 minute task which consists on “falling in the fountain”.

    Also, there should be a link here to the mountain of money.

  2. i love burns, just like conan. i love how he uses these random old terms like “brisk constitutional” (so does conan). god.. so many good characters. Im pretty sure i like the second and third string characters more than the main ones!

Leave a Reply