Hello to all my TSTO cupids, singles, swingers and monogamists! Does that cover every one? Let’s see… Ralph Wiggum as cupid, CBG the bachelor, Dr. Hibbert the swinger and Homer. Yup… got ‘em all!
With the holiday event coming to a close on January 14th, a lot of us are just waiting for a return of the Valentine’s Day event and you know that means. I get the chance to dish on some stuff I’d like to see with it. Best part for me is reader pkkao actually asked me to do it. For most of this post, I’ll be abbreviating Valentine’s Day as VD. Covers two reasons, my laziness and how funny I think it is to use that particular abbreviation in conjunction with a “love” holiday.
I initially found myself stumped with what I wanted for the event. There are romances all over The Simpsons but I wanted to hit specific VD items for you. To facilitate this, I just decided to re-watch episodes, talk a little about them and show some stuff I’d like from them. Sound good? Hopefully you say yes or clicked away from the post cuz I’m gonna keep going. I had so much fun with this one it actually ended up being a two-parter. Just please don;t think of this post as Episode I, that’d make me sad.
Alright, I’d like to start with a disclaimer. I did not re-watch what is arguably the best VD episode, “I Love Lisa” (S4:E15). While this one always makes me laugh, TSTO already has Ralph Wiggum and the Choo-Choo-Choose You Train which would be my picks.
Best I can say is I hope the train comes back. I could always mention KBBL radio again and the Monster Mash song but you’re probably tired of hearing that one by now, right?
If there’s something you think I missed from that episode, just pop a comment below. Instead, I re-watched four other VD episodes you might not remember or be aware of. Without further ado… here we go…..
Season 10, Episode 14: “I’m with Cupid”
In the list of VD episodes, this one is actually my favorite. From the chalkboard gag: “Hillbillies are people too” to Homer telling Lisa a story about a prince who fell asleep for 100 years until he was awakened by the kiss of a noble raccoon, I always laugh throughout this one.
The episode revolves around Apu trying to make up to his wife after she finds out he doesn’t have to work 18 hours a day, 7 days a week. He tried to tell her that “Endless toil is the only true path out of this jerkwater burg” and that the Kwik-E-Mart is a harsh mistress but no dice.
Apu decides to make it up to Manjula by giving her a special gift for all 7 days before VD. (How’s that for an idea EA?)
Homer: “She’s not going to leave you right before Valentine’s Day. That’d be like going to an air show and leaving before the plane crash.”
Apu is not convinced. His romantic gifts include teaching a parrot to sing, taking Manjula to La Boheme and giant chocolates. While his wife loves the attention, his thoughtfulness ends up getting all the other men of Springfield in hot water with their ladies. How could they have known it’s always a good idea to spend more on your significant other than you do on temporary tattoos. I don’t care how cute that Taco Bell dog is. Wives quiero romance.
Homer: “This Valentine’s crap has gone too far.”
The men set out to ruin Apu’s official VD Gift, a skywriter. Homer ends up stopping the complete message (I <3 U Manjula). He ending ends up looking like a star-like character. The response of the Springfield women is too funny.
Maude Flanders sees “I love you Angel”. Sarah Wiggum sees “I love you Poppinfresh”. Edna sees “I love you Edna K. It’s a little run together but that’s what it says.” Marge’s is by far my favorite. “I love you… Cactus? Blobby? Epsilon?”
In the end, Homer falls from the sky with roses, Marge promises to snuggle his brains out and Sir Elton John sings “Your Song” to Manjula on the Kwik-E-Mart rooftop garden. Gosh I love writing sentences like that!
WAWW… Kwik-E-Mart Valentine’s Day Skin
Giant Chocolate Apu (preferably with Baron Von’s Munch House Truck)
Shriner cars and/or tasks for Grandpa and Jasper (Old Jewish Man of course would complete the set EA!)
Sea Captain’s Sardine Queen Boat for Squidport (apparently the Sea Captain and his men are Smithers’ kind of sailors, yaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrr)
Apu’s Firebird (Of all the cars, I want this one most!)
Fantastic Dan and his plane
Manjula Nahasapeemapetilon. Apu works hard and deserves his wife in the game plus a questline inspired by this episode would be just the treat for this event.
Season 19, Episode 12: “Love, Springfieldian Style”
Ahhh… Nothing says love quite like candy hearts with “Sweet on You” and “Release the Hounds” on them. This VD episode is basically like a Treehouse of Horror episode in that it’s broken down into 3 segments.
The episode opens with Homer taking Marge to a carnival for VD. This may seem insensitive but he points out that this means they’ll have 2 hours alone without the kids just like when they lost them at the mall and had the Best. Christmas. Ever. Homer takes Marge on the Tunnel of Love ride for some smooching. Bart turns the water in the ride to Jell-o as a prank and to pass the time while they’re stuck, the family all tells stories.
The three stories are as follows:
1) A Simpsons version of the Bonnie and Clyde story. It’s an ok segment but something about bad-girl Marge as Bonnie doesn’t jive with me.
2) Shady and the Vamp: The Simpsons as dogs in a Lady and the Tramp parody. Too funny. Moe as a bulldog, Bumblee Man as a Chihuahua and Edna as a smoking poodle are by far my favorites. Definitely a spoof on Disney which makes me giggle.
3) A Sid and Nancy story with chocolate instead of heroin. This has nothing to do with VD but as a guy who spent his youth in the punk rock scene and emulated Sid Vicious (had the padlock on the chain and everything), I love it.
All in all a good episode. The VD stuff bookends the 3 stories. I did love this little tidbit from Bart explaining where babies come from.
“If Dad kisses Mom too much a stork will lay an angel egg in her tummy and next thing you know… we find a baby brother in the cabbage patch. Here’s a thumbnail sketch.”
The Tunnel of Love ride. Granted it’s a ride at a local carnival but wouldn’t the Tunnel of Love be cool in Krustyland? Plus it’s got scary robots and simulated privacy so it’s really a romantic addition.
Kissin Killers Statue. While it’s my least favorite segment of the three, I think this is funny.
CBGBs aka Comic Book Guy’s Bar. Probably only want this because of nostalgia but hey… it’s my post.
Well… that’s enough from the fuzzball for today. Please post your comments below about your opinions and anything else you’d like to see for Valentine’s Day. Part Deux of this post is already written and will be coming soon (if it’s not soon enough blame the squirrel we pay to publish posts).
Keep on tapa-tapa tapping and TTFN… Wookiee out!
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