Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!
Well Terwilligers is still lingering in our towns. Are you still working on stuff? Or are you like me and just going about your regular TSTO business? (finally catching up on questlines!)
So even though the event is still lingering we thought now would be a fun time to take a look back at all the dialogue and jokes of the main questlines that popped up during Terwilligers (we’ll cover premium and side quests in another post…otherwise this would be the post that never ended!). Especially since many of you have been requesting this over the last few days! So if you missed any of the dialogue during the 3 Acts here’s your chance to catch it all!
It all starts with Cecil and his arrival in Springfield….can you remember back that far? So here we go with Cecil, The Simpsons and the angry townspeople of Springfield…
Cecil’s Redemption Pt. 1
Cecil: Ah, Springfield. I’m not the first lover of fine culture to come to grief in this town.
Lisa: Dad, it’s Cecil Terwilliger!
Homer: I’m sorry. Is “Cecil Terwilliger” one of your Buddhist holidays, like “Madhu Purnima?”
Lisa: No, it’s Sideshow Bob’s brother, Cecil. Didn’t you watch episode 4F14?
Homer: I usually skip it if I’m not the main guy.
Cecil: Don’t be alarmed, Lisa. I’ve served my time in jail, and I’ve come back to Springfield to make amends.
Homer: Look out — he’s come to make almonds!
Cecil: This could take a while.
Make Cecil Make Amends- 4hrs, Earns $175. 45xp
Cecil’s Redemption Pt. 2
Cecil: I’ve apologized to everyone in town, including babies that weren’t born when I committed my crimes. Won’t you good people forgive and forget, and let me stay in Springfield?
Mayor Quimby: As a leader, it’s time for me to step up and ask what everyone else thinks.
Make Springfielders Vote on Whether Cecil Can Stay– x4. 1hr, Earns $70, 17xp Freemium, $105, 26xp Premium
Cecil: The voting is done. What does fate hold in store for simple Cecil?
Mayor Quimby: Well, there was a lot of debate.
Cecil: About whether I could stay in town?
Quimby: No, about the best way to kick you out. We settled on running you out of town on the back of a horse.
Cecil: Lucky I had eight semesters of dressage in elementary school!
Lisa: Honestly, saying things like that cost you a lot of votes.
Cecil’s Redemption Pt. 3
Cecil: So you’re going to throw me out of town?
Homer: Sorry, your celebrity apologies were humble, but not Paula Deen humble, and we don’t need another mouth to feed.
Cecil: Yes, this isn’t a great town for food. The town’s supermarket only appears in the show’s opening credits. But as it happens, I work for Monsarno Corporation, the world’s largest maker of genetically modified organisms. I could have them open a center here, and bring this dump of a town the benefits of modern food science.
Quimby: If you brought ancient food nonsense, we’d still be ahead.
Build Monsarno Research– Free. 8hr build
After completion the Event will kick off. You’ll start to see the prize icon & new store items
Cecil’s Redemption Pt. 4
Lisa: Cecil, do you really think building a self-contained research campus complete with self-driving latte carts is really going to make us happy?
Cecil: Fine, then. What would make you happy?
Lisa: Ponies and Homework.
Cecil: Well, I need someone to complete a seemingly endless list of arbitrary and pointless tasks. That’s just like homework.
Lisa: Yay! And the ponies?
Cecil: If by some miracle you ever finish the tasks, we’ll talk about ponies.
Complete Cecil’s Task– Check out the daily tasks and complete them
Scientophagy Pt. 1
Cletus: Monsarno, can you help me improve the productativity of my farm?
Cecil: Yes, with genetically modified seeds that are pest-resistant and can survive on half a spittoon of tobaccy juice a day.
Cletus: Sounds fantasmajastic. Only problem is, I ain’t got no way to pay.
Cecil: We’ll make you a giant loan to buy our stuff. What do you have for collateral?
Cletus: A strange civilization of worms living between my butt-ocks.
Make Cletus Make a Donation to Science– 8hrs, Earns 9 Fertelizer, 70xp
Scientophagy Pt. 2
Homer: These vegetables are a lot of work. I have to lift them off the plate, put them in my mouth. And peas! Don’t get me started. Always falling off the fork, like jerks.
Cecil: So you’re saying, you’d like vegetables that are genetically modified to walk right into your lazy mouth.
Homer: Oh, could you?
Cecil: Well, you’ll have to come explain it to the scientists yourself, because they’d never believe me.
Upgrade Monsarno Research to Level 3
Make Homer Advance Food Science– 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Scientophagy Pt. 3
Homer: Now this is scientific food! I lie on the couch and the tomato walks right into my mouth.
Mutant Veggie: Meen-eep. Meen-eep.
Homer: So clever and delicious. *Crunch*
Lisa: Dad, stop! They’re like little people.
Homer: Yeah, little people who’ve been genetically engineered to love being eaten.
Lisa: I’m a vegetarian. I can’t eat these vegetables!
Make Lisa Protest Monsarno Playing God– 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Chaos She-ory Pt. 1
Lisa: This is it, Milhouse. I won’t let these adorable walking vegetables be used just to feed desperately malnourished Springfielders.
Milhouse: But if you set them free, they’ll be like a plague in this town.
Lisa: So what? We’ve had plagues before, Milhouse.
Milhouse: Yeah, the game designers keep going back to that well.
Make Lisa Free the Mutant Vegetables– 1hr, Earns $70, 17xp
Lisa: The door is unlocked… the gate is open… run away, little vegetables, run away!
Milhouse: It’s the “Dawn of the Planet of the Grapes.”
Completing this task will unlock the ability for you to tap Mutant Vegetables wandering around your town. They’ll now start spawning in your town and you can tap them for shovels, fertilizer, corn and mutant seeds.
Chaos She-ory Pt. 2
Quimby: Great, Lisa, you’ve released mutant vegetables and now they’re everywhere.
Lisa: That’s right. “Ye shall reap what ye have sown!” But don’t actually reap them… they’re so cute!
Quimby: Well, they can’t stay here. They’re planting themselves in softball fields and dog parks without a city permit.
Homer: But we can’t send them away — they’re so yummy. Walk into my mouth, cucumber! *Crunch* Mmm, sentience.
Cletus: When we’s got hungry pigs, we sets’em loose in the neighbors fields, and then pick ‘em up when they’s all fatted out.
Quimby: Once again, your illegal yokel wisdom has saved the day– we’ll seed mutant vegetables in our friend’s towns, then collect them when they’re grown.
Deploy Mutant Seedlings in Other Springfields– Visit neighbors and leave them Mutant Seeds.
Sideshow Bob: Part one of my plan has succeeded perfectly! I knew that if I told my ignorant buffoon of a brother to go apologize to Springfield, he’d end up building a Monsarno plant. And Lisa, with her soft heart, was sure to free the mutant vegetables, bringing chaos into the town. I am a genius!
Sideshow Bob Henchman: Why didn’t you just release a bunch of mutant vegetables yourself?
Sideshow Bob: Where’s the irony in that?
Sideshow Bob Henchman: In my opinion it would be more efficient.
Sideshow Bob: You’re a henchman. I didn’t hire you for opinions, I hired you to hench.
End of Act 1…..
The Soup Thickens Pt. 1
Homer: Looks like all those mutant vegetables from Part One of this event are finally gone.
Lisa: Yeah, but if I know anything about Part Two’s, we’re headed for a diabolical twist that will blow your socks off.
Sideshow Bob Clone: Ooooh!
Bart: Aaagh! Sideshow Bob… vegetables?
Sideshow Bob Clone: Mozart… Faulkner… HBO Dramas…
Lisa: The town is full of mutant vegetables again, but now they look and sound like Sideshow Bob. We have to get rid of them!
Homer: You were right Lisa. It’s slightly worse than Part One. It’s about the same but slightly worse!!!
Squish Bob Clones- x5. Tap on the to squish
The Soup Thickens Pt. 2
Bart: Someone has created an army of Sideshow Bob mutant vegetable clones and sent them to kill me! But who?
Lisa: It all comes back to Monsarno Research. I have an interview there for a summer internship, but I can promise you, the interviewers won’t be the only ones asking some tough questions!
Make Lisa Interview at Monsarno- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Make Lisa Ask Tough Questions- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
The Soup Thickens Pt. 3
Lisa: So Sideshow Bob used to be Director of Research at Monsarno?
Cecil: Yes, and a little of his DNA accidentally contaminated the new GMO vegetables we’re creating. A perfectly normal and predictable side effect.
Bart: Like Hell! This was all Bob’s plan to kill me with these terrible clones.
Cecil: I don’t see how. They’re very inoffensive, and they make an excellent soup stock.
Bart: I might die of how ugly they are to look at.
Reach Level 12 and Build Bart’s Treehouse
Make Bart Hide in the Treehouse- 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
The Soup Thickens Pt. 4
Bart: Stupid Sideshow Bob vegetables. I’m done being scared of you. My days of hiding are done!
Homer: Bart, our court-mandated father-son time begins now.
Bart: My days of hiding start now!
Make Bart Hide in the Brown House- 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
The Science of Cooking
Frink: Greetings, vegetable-embattled citizens of Springfield. I am here representing Frink-Co, NOT a division of Monsarno. We’d like to be one but they refused to buy us, nnn-hoyvin. Our expert scientists, by which I mean me, have developed a potent herbicide that should nip this plague in the bud, which is exactly where it needs to be nipped. Just sprinkle this on the offending vegetable and die it shall. Afterwards, you can cook it — the herbicide is basically MSG and Mrs. Dash.
Build Herbicide Squirter- Free
Squish Bob Clones- x15
Pushback Pt. 1
Comic Book Guy: Stop destroying these clones! For the first time, I have enough clones to join me in forming a full Cosmic Wars storm trooper platoon!
Reach Level 13 and Build Android’d Dungeon
Make Comic Book Guy Role Play Cosmic Wars- 6hrs, Earns $225, 55xp
Comic Book Guy: Clone warriors! Our first mission is to believe that these are not the drobots we are looking for.
Bob Clone: Simpson… Gilbert and Sullivan… Face/Off…
Comic Book Guy: We have succeeded!
Bart: Professor Frink, you’ve got to kill these Bob-clones faster! Everywhere I turn, I see them. I’m going crazy. Who knows what kind of pranking I could be driven to do?!
Quimby: Dear God. We’re already known as America’s Doorstep-Burning-Poop-Bag Capital as it is. Do something, Frink!
Frink: Fear not. Frink-Co shall live up to our slogan: “The Science of Slaughter”. It’s not a great slogan but it was the only one no one else had taken.
Tap Herbicide Squirter
Upgrade Frink’s Herbicide to Level 3- Requires Corn and DNA (Level 2- 60 Corn, 60 DNA. Level 3- 120 Corn, 120 DNA)
Pushback Pt. 3
Lisa: Ms. Krabappel, where are you going with that vegetable Sideshow Bob Clone?
Mrs. Krabappel: On a date. These clones are real gentlemen. They’re well-groomed, they don’t gas on about themselves, and they always have something nice to say to a lady.
Bob Clone: Splendiferous!
Mrs. Krabappel: Plus if you kiss them you get vitamin C.
Reach Level 22 and Build Krabappel Aparments
Make Mrs. Krabappel Go on a Date- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Pushback Pt. 4
Moe: Oh no you clones don’t — dating our ladies. I’ve got enough competition for women from real human men. Although to be fair most women would rather clean sewer traps than go on a date with me. It’s time to squash Sideshow-Bob-shaped squash!
Squish Bob Clones- x25
Pushback Pt. 5
Mrs. Krabappel starts
Selma: Damn it, the men of Springfield are squashing our handsome vegetable hunks.
Mrs. K: Cecil, you better get more clones out on the streets or you’re going to get handbagged hard upside the head.
Cecil: But that would violate every inch of scientific ethics.
Selma: The alternative is I violate several inches of you.
Cecil: I’ll get right on it.
Upgrade Monsarno to Level 8- Requires 1.050 Fertilizer and 175 Corn
Pushback Pt. 6
Bart: The single men of Springfield have formed a mob that wants to destroy all the Sideshow Bob clones.
Lisa: And the single women have formed a mob that wants to create more of them.
Homer: We’ll solve this the traditional Springfield way…Whichever mob destroys more property is the winner.
Make Springfielder’s Riot and Smash Krusty Burger- x5. 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp Freemium and $600, 150xp Premium
Make Springfielder’s Riot and Loot Kwik-E-Mart- x5. 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp Freemium and $600, 150xp Premium
Make Mayor Quimby Hide Out in the Brown House- 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
Blessings of Guilt
Quimby: Cecil Terwilliger, you and the Monsarno Corporation have caused an orgy of destruction that has left this town in a state that can only be called “slightly worse than normal.” How do you propose to rectify this PR nightmare?
Cecil: Well, the Corporation could do something to dramatically improve the cultural life of Springfield.
Lisa: Donating some used magazines would do that.
Cecil: I had in mind building an Opera House.
Quimby: It sounds like an expensive boondoggle.
Cecil: A boon of which you will receive an ample share of doggle.
Quimby: We break ground in five minutes!
Build Outdoor Opera Stage- Free, 24hr Build. Unlocks Sideshow Bob
Sideshow Bob: Whenever Monsarno runs into trouble, they build an opera house. Once again, my brother Cecil is my unwitting dupe. It was but a tiny effort to put some of my DNA into those vegetables, just as I added some Boobarella DNA into these lusty leafy vegetables. Isn’t that right, Boobarugula?
Sideshow Bob: Hush, my sweet. There will be time for pillow talk… tonight.
End of Act 2….
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 1
Lisa: There’s certainly been a lot of trouble since Cecil Terwilliger showed up in Springfield.
Bart: For a start, we built something that’s going to be a source of endless horror.
Lisa: Monsarno Research?
Bart: No, the Springfield Opera House.
Quimby: We can’t use the Opera House anyway. The moment it opened, all the Sideshow Bob clones ran there and sat down waiting for a performance to start.
Bart: Sounds like a job for Skyfinger.
Tap 25 Bob Clones
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 2
Sideshow Bob Starts
Sideshow Bob: Squish all the clones of me that you like, Skyfinger. It will not affect my plan one jot! Although it does hurt my feelings. Cecil and the Simpsons are my ignorant dupes, following my master plan with no idea I am here. I hide in the Brown House, pulling strings like a puppet master and eating gourmet meals.
Sideshow Bob Henchman: Your baked beans are ready.
Sideshow Bob: Wonderful — make some toast triangles! And now, Skyfinger, watch as my brilliant plot to destroy Bart Simpson unfolds!
Make Sideshow Bob Laugh Maniacally– 8hrs, Earns $275, 70xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 3
Lisa: Now the town has an Opera House, what show shall we put on? Verdi’s “La Traviata?” Puccini’s “Madame Butterfly?”
Bart: Bugs Bunny’s “What’s Opera Doc?”
Cecil: As it turns out, I just received an anonymous manuscript in the mail. It’s for a musical called “Specter of the Opera House”. It’s the story of a man who loves art, but who is tormented by the world because of his strange looks.
Lisa: Hm. It sounds a lot like “Phantom of the Opera” by Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Cecil: Good heavens no, this is a PARODY of that. And therefore we owe that pretentious buffoon nothing!
Make Lisa Learn Copyright Law– 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 4
Lisa: I’m skeptical, Cecil. We build an Opera House, and suddenly a free manuscript for a new opera arrives in the mail?
Cecil: Yes, it’s odd. And look at this: the star is supposed to be a little girl — she must be a vegetarian, love jazz, and get nothing but gold stars on her homework.
Lisa: That’s me! Except I can’t sing.
Cecil: No problem, the manuscript is very clear: “Singing and dancing ability not required.”
Lisa: Now I’m really skeptical. A really skeptical girl who is going to be a star!
Make Lisa Practice Her Opera Part– 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 5
Lisa: I’m so excited to start rehearsals for the opera, Cecil! I’m going to send hilarious tweets about theater hijinks to everyone who follows me on Twitter.
Bart: So mom plus nobody else will be getting some tweets.
Cecil: The script calls for a second lead. A little boy. And it’s very specific. Blue shorts, a red T-shirt, and spiky hair a must…
Lisa: Bart, that’s you!
Bart: Forget it. The only musical theater performance I do is farting in the lobby.
Cecil: Lisa, you’ll have to persuade Bart with your most cogent and sensible arguments.
Lisa: Got it. Ultimate little sister nagging.
Make Lisa Harass Bart– 24hrs, Earns $1200, 300xp (Requires Bart)
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 6
Bart: Stop bugging me Lisa!
Lisa: Be in our opera.
Bart: Quit it!
Lisa: Be in our opera.
Bart: Go away!
Lisa: Be in our opera.
Make Bart Hide in Treehouse– 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
Bart: I’m sure glad God invented tree houses so that kids could get away from their sisters.
Mysterious Voice: Bart, hear me!
Bart: Where is that strange voice coming from? I feel like I’ve heard it a million times, in different voice-overs. Is it Josh Gad?
Mysterious Voice: No Bart, I am your Angel of Music!
Bart: Eh. Sounds kind of goody goody.
Mysterious Voice: Fine, I am your Rock and Roll Satan.
Bart: Now we’re talkin’.
Mysterious Voice: Appear in Lisa’s musical, and I will give you a gift beyond measure…
Bart: An ATV that is way too overpowered for a child?
Mysterious Voice: I was going to say a college education, but ATV it is.
Plantom of the Opera Pt.7
Sideshow Bob starts
Sideshow Bob: So, Bart has taken the bait and will star in the anonymous opera that I, Sideshow Bob, wrote. On opening night, when he steps out to perform his solo, I shall cut the chain that holds the giant chandelier, and it shall fall on Bart and crush him!
Sideshow Bob Henchman: Instead of killing Bart on opening night, why not save time and do it during rehearsals?
Sideshow Bob: You just don’t get revenge, do you? Oh, why did I hire a henchman from Craigslist?
Make Sideshow Bob Laugh Maniacally- 8hrs, Earns $275, 70xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 8
Cecil: The rehearsals for “Specter of the Opera House” are going extremely well. Lisa, you’ve proven once again that the power of a little girl mugging for the audience will overcome any lack of talent.
Lisa: Thanks, I think.
Cecil: And Bart has really gotten into his part too.
Lisa: I dunno. There’s something strange about the way he practices scales.
Bart: A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A. T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T. V-V-V-V-V-V-V-V-V.
Cecil: Well, I have to go watch auditions for the remaining roles. First up, Moe.
Moe: I can only sing one note, I can’t dance on account of the plate in my head, and my face scares children and adults alike.
Cecil: For Springfielders, that puts you on the definite call-back list.
Make Springfielders Audition for the Opera– x10. Send 10 Springfielders to Audition. 4hrs. Earns $175, 45xp Freemium and $260, 70xp Premium
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 9
Cecil: Finally, the opening night of “Specter of the Opera House”. Act one, Lisa’s tragic solo.
Lisa: *Sings* “I’m just a child who can’t appreciate the genius of a sideshow man!”
Cecil: Now the comedy counterpoint.
Moe: *Sings* “Can someone help me? I’m stuck in the can.”
Cecil: And now Act Three — Bart’s big song!
Bart: *Sings* “For the way I made the Specter cry, I deserve to die.”
Sideshow Bob: Indeed you do, Bart. I’ve weakened the chandelier chain. Just one little pull and it will fall and crush you.
Bart: *Sings* “His sensitive soul, I crushed like a troll…”
Sideshow Bob: But wait… Bart’s voice really is angelic. How can I kill him at the moment when my opera is to achieve its triumph?!
Make Sideshow Bob Marvel at his own Brilliance– 30m, Earns $40, 10xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt. 10
Sideshow Bob starts
Cecil: Bart’s opera solo is done, and now I can reveal a slight problem. This anonymous manuscript has no final scene.
Sideshow Bob: That is because the final scene is my triumphant return!
Cecil: Brother Robert — you’re here in Springfield?!
Sideshow Bob: Indeed, Cecil. Everything that has happened has happened because I wanted it so. And now for my crowning triumph, I shall perform the final aria of the brilliant musical play I have written. Standing beneath the glow of the mighty chandelier…
Make Sideshow Bob Get Crushed Under a Chandelier– 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
Plantom of the Opera Pt.11
Sideshow Bob starts
Cecil: So, dear brother, all your machinations have come to this. Trapped under a mess of crystal and sparking light bulbs with a small boy farting at you.
Bart: You loser, don’t you know you can never defeat a main character?
Sideshow Bob: Where do I go now? Who will appreciate a middling operatic talent and a psychopathic killer?
Cecil: Have you considered Laughlin, Nevada?
Make Sideshow Bob Run for Cover– 24hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
And there you have it my friends…all the fun of the past month and a half!
Did you enjoy rereading all the dialogue from Terwilligers? Were there any parts you missed? Any jokes you didn’t catch the first time around? Thoughts on the event still going on? Sound off in the comments below, you know we love hearing from you!