Back in when we started this site in 2013 we tried to separate ourselves from the loads of other TSTO blogs out there at the time by being different. In addition to the traditional gameplay posts we wanted to bring you guys different content, fun content. We wanted to be different, and what better way for a site called TSTO Addicts to be different than to hold regular meetings of TSTO Anonymous?
These meetings were spearheaded by the one, the only, Wookiee. While I’ve got a few “classic” TSTO-Anon posts I plan to run over the next few days, I wanted to start out this Look Back series with two of the very first TSTO Anonymous posts, since we’re all Addicts here right? It’s funny to see a lot of the “issues” from 2013 still hold true today!
So without further ado, I turn it over to Wookiee circa 2013…
Hi… I’m Wookieecorp and I’m a Tapaholic…
With a URL of TSTO Addicts… we take addiction to this game very seriously. We know the game is “life-ruiningly fun” and hope to help other tapperinos before their lives are seriously affected by this most righteous of games. We submit this 12 step program that we believe will help all tappers with this addiction:
Step One: (HONESTY) We admitted we were powerless over The Simpsons Tapped Out—that our game had become unmanageable.
Step Two: (FAITH) Came to believe that the programmers at EA, a power greater than ourselves, could restore us to sanity.
Step Three: (SURRENDER) Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of the EA programmers as we understood them.
Step Four: (SOUL SEARCHING) Made a searching and fearless inventory of our decorations.
Step Five: (INTEGRITY) Admitted to EA, to ourselves, and to other tapperinos the exact nature of our addiction.
Step Six: (ACCEPTANCE) We’re entirely ready to have EA remove all the glitches from the game.
Step Seven: (HUMILITY) Humbly asked EA to remove the glitches.
Step Eight: (WILLINGNESS) Made a list of all characters we had used, and became willing to make amends to them.
Step Nine: (FORGIVENESS) Made direct amends to such characters wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or just not make any sense.
Step Ten: (MAINTENANCE) Continued to take a game inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
Step Eleven: (MAKING CONTACT) Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with EA as we understood them, praying only for knowledge of future updates and when to expect them.
Step Twelve: (SERVICE) Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other tapaholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
The authors of TSTO Addicts sincerely hope this program is helpful to us all. We close this meeting of Tapped Out Anonymous with the Serenity Prayer: “EA, grant me the serenity to accept the updates I cannot change, the courage to recommend the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
The second meeting of TSTO Anonymous from September 6th, 2013...
We start this bi-monthly meeting of TSTO Anon with a random fact found on the internet: 7-11% of all gamers suffer from “pathological” behavior. Jeesh… glad we only allow 89% of tappers on this site, right?
Here at Addicts, we are well aware that some people “enjoy” the game a skoshi more than others. Whether it’s scheduling tasks, cursing EA or reading blogs about a game we play “four times a day”, serious fans of TSTO may exhibit some classic abuse or addict behavior. What might that behavior be? Well, I perused some popular addiction websites and found some information which may just show you that denial is much more than a river in Egypt.
First off, let me state that there is a difference between “ abuse” and “addiction”. All addicts are abusers of whatever they are addicted to. Not all abusers are addicts—but they could become one either now or in the near future. Here are some signs and symptoms of both.
Common signs and symptoms of TSTO abuse
One: You’re neglecting your responsibilities at school, work, or home (e.g. flunking classes, skipping work, neglecting your children) because of your TSTO use.
Two: You’re playing TSTO under dangerous conditions or taking risks, such as driving while playing the game, using dirty devices, or repeatedly having Quimby and Miss Springfield engage in promiscuous, immoral behavior.
Three: Your TSTO use is getting you into legal trouble, such as arrests for illegal hacking or stealing to support a donut habit.
Four: Your TSTO use is causing problems in your relationships, such as fights with your partner or family members, an unhappy boss, or the loss of old friends.
Common signs and symptoms of TSTO addiction
ONE: You’ve built up a tolerance. You need more and more content/land to get the enjoyment you used to have at lower levels.
TWO: You have withdrawal symptoms. If you go too long without TSTO, you experience symptoms such as restlessness, insomnia, depression, shaking, and anxiety.
THREE: You’ve lost control over your TSTO use. You often play the game more than you planned, even though you told yourself you wouldn’t. You may want to stop playing, but you feel doing so might cause you to miss something.
FOUR: Your life revolves around TSTO. You spend a lot of time not just playing TSTO, but thinking about it.
FIVE: You’ve abandoned activities you used to enjoy, such as hobbies, sports, and socializing, because of TSTO.
SIX: You continue to use TSTO, despite knowing it’s hurting you. It’s causing major problems in your life—fatigue-induced blackouts, tapping finger infections, mood swings, depression, paranoia—but you play anyway.
The next information comes straight from several different addiction web sites. Minor wording was changed to make it apply. Let’s start with the definition:
“Addiction is a catch-all term for a complex behavioral disorder. The most obvious symptom is that Addicts reach a point where they cannot control their own actions. Even when they can see the harm, they continue the compulsive behavior. The inability to stop, more than any other attribute, marks addiction.”
“While all addictions will exhibit some of these signs, substances and behaviors differ depending on the addiction. Most addicts will deny the extent of their problem, but at some point will admit (at least to themselves) that a problem exists.”
“Unfortunately, the label, “addict” is has become a powerfully negative and ugly stereotype. It is neither a character defect nor a moral weakness. Anyone can become an addict if they are exposed to the proper stimulus in the right context.”
Ok, wow, got kinda heavy all of a sudden. I think we can all agree we never want to be like Lisa after visiting Duff Gardens.
Whether you consider yourself an Addict or not, you ARE reading this post on a site dubbed TSTO Addicts, so maybe you are? I myself know I am addicted to this game but there are worse things. To lighten up the info, I found 12 steps to help conquer addiction. I provided my own ways I have applied these in my life. I mean, after your child stages an intervention about your Simpsons “problem”, you gotta do something, right?
Ok… maybe that’s not the best way to handle it lol. Here’s the list of 12 steps to conquering addiction.
1. Get Some Buddies
Joined the community… check!
2. Read Away the Craving
Subscribed to several TSTO Blogs… double check.
3. Be Accountable to Someone
Does holding myself accountable to the readers of this site count?
4. Predict Your Weak Spots
We all need to know when we’re game cash poor or vulnerable to running out of land. I’m good at this, huh?
5. Distract Yourself
I have a touch of ADHD and 3 kiddos so done and done.
Air Conditioning off and sweating begun. They didn’t mean exercise, right?
7. Start a Project
Why do you think I joined a blog team or started 2D?
8. Keep a Record
I haven’t started this but I do have friends who keep TSTO game journals. Looking at you Em.
9. Be the Expert on the topic
Or at least you can pretend to be. Trust me when I say if you don’t know something, Siri and Google do!
10. Grab Your Security Item
Mine has Chewbacca on it!
11. Get on Your Knees
Ummm… this one might work if done appropriately. At the risk of being censored, I just started playing Indian style in my living room. Nobody wants this to be them.
12. Do Nothing
This may be what I am best at lol. I may not be getting better… but at least I’m not getting worse!
Phew! I rocked those tasks! Hi… I’m Wookieecorp and I may be a Tapaholic but at least I’m not Ken Griffey, Jr and addicted to nerve tonic.
So… are you an Addict? Please share with the group. Coffee is provided in your kitchen. Well… I sincerely hope you found this informative. This meeting ended up a little long but at least showed me I work for the right blog… TTFN… You stay classy Tapperinos!
DISCLAIMER: The jokes in this post in no way are meant to make fun of true addiction or the struggles of those in recovery. We here at Addicts wish any one on the wagon the very best! (Except Marge because her gambling addiction is hilarious.) Wookiee out!
We hope you enjoyed this look back from the TSTO Anonymous Archives! What are your thoughts on Wookiee’s take? Are you a TSTO Addict? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!
Oh and for all the “buzz kill” folks out there…remember this is in light-hearted fun. So save your “it’s not funny to joke about ____” remarks for someone else. I promise they won’t make it past moderation.