Thank Grog It’s Firday!
I’m not going to say why…but man, do I need a break from this week. No…it has nothing to do with Peach Mint Korn (inside family/friends joke) but more to do with trying to get everything done I need to get done, before heading out to New Orleans on the 27th. I know…I know...poor, poor me!
But, what I really want to write about, is that I think the writers have really lost it this year. I get it. Grandpa’s memory is more than a little hazy. But, come on. Did they really have to go there?
Pagans are one thing…but making Santa a Nazi, is really over the top. However, Heir Santa is only a small portion of the “less than Christmas” vibe of this event. Let’s take a look and see what else the writers are cooking up…
We already know that there is a huge problem in continuity with this 4-week, mini/major event format. They are really 4 mini-events, tied loosely together with a theme. But, man...loose is really a loose translation of the word loose! This entire event is looser than the stool of a guy on an all protein shake diet!
OK. So maybe that visual was a bit much. But, the fact is…this event just gets worse, the longer it hangs around.
I actually think they are using Grandpa as a foil, to make up for the fact that they couldn’t figure out how to tie four really random “acts” together. Grandpa, because he’s old, meanders all over the place…so they can do whatever they want. Right?
But, Santa as a Nazi that wants to assassinate Churchill??
Historically, in the game and in the series, when it comes to Abe’s exploits in WWII, they are convoluted and really, really out there. From being a hero as one of the Flying Hellfish, to actually dodging service as a cross-dresser (so he could play in the women’s baseball league with Jasper), you have to wonder where reality comes into play. Of course, there are a ton of you who immediately are jumping to the “BUT IT IS A CARTOON!!!” retort. And, I get it.
But, when you start turning Santa, the most beloved character of the secular side of our favorite religious holiday, into one of the most hated symbols of the 20th century, you have gone too far.
But, read that last sentence. What is too far???
There’s too far…and then, apparently, there’s WAY too far!
I’ll show you. But to do so, I am going to break one of our cardinal rules here at Addicts…and jump AHEAD to the final two acts of this really insanely non-Christmas/Holiday/Winter event.
On Christmas Day… On one of two of the most important Christian holidays…we start “Abe the Toy Soldier” with its nod to fighting Communism, after WWII is over, and a ridiculous telling of how Grandpa becomes a model for plastic toy soldiers…after admitting to killing one of his superior officers in the war. We then slip into the FBI spying on citizens…but are thwarted by the CIA.
Ah…nothing says “Christmas” like domestic spying, and government deceit.
But it gets better. We also have a chance to get another “Less than Holiday/Christmas” Premium character… Christian Krusty. “Hey…with a name like Christian Krusty It HAS to Be Funny! Right?”
This of course would have made more sense if they had called him Kristian Krusty. As you can imagine, Krusty’s turn into Christianity, comes complete with a conversation with Azzlan, our favorite Christian Lion icon, who represents…ah…never mind. This thing is convoluted enough without bringing CS Lewis characters into it.
I’m going to REALLY break the rules here…and print a ton of the dialogue to make my point.
Krusty the Christian: Have you heard the news?
Azzlan: That Jesus is our savior?
Krusty the Christian: Even better news: I’m a Christian now!
Azzlan : Wonderful! Since I’m the world’s most famous Christian lion, maybe you should have me on your TV show.
Krusty the Christian: We already have a monkey. Can you take a pie in the face?
Azzlan: I can take anything. I mean, the White Witch sacrificed me on a stone altar.
Krusty the Christian: We’ll call you if we need you.
Task: Make Christian Krusty Have Communion (4h)
Task: Make Azzlan Pester Krusty About a Job (4h, Krusty Burger)
Part 2
Sophie Krustofsky: Dad, is becoming a Christian just your latest fad? Like when you got into jet skiing and started riding a jet ski around your apartment?
Krusty the Christian: *praying with rosary beads* I know it’s hard to deal with a clown that’s been saved. But I can’t help loving Jesus! Also, when I do stand up comedy for Christians, they like me, because they like things that aren’t funny.
Task: Make Christian Krusty Practice Christian Stand Up (4h, Krusty Burger)
Task: Make Sophie Krustofsky Be Skeptical of Her Dad (4h, Krusty Burger)
Part 3
Rev. Lovejoy: Krusty, we’re so happy to welcome you into our loving community. Now, have you heard about “tithing”? That’s a joyous Christian experience where you give me ten percent of your income.
Krusty the Christian: Ten percent! That’s what my agent charges. For that kind of money can you get me parts in movies?
Rev. Lovejoy: I’m afraid not.
Krusty the Christian: Well, don’t feel bad. Neither can my agent.
Task: Make Christian Krusty Read Movie Roles (4h, Krusty Burger)
Part 4
Krusty the Christian: I may have to give up being a Christian, Sophie.
Sophie Krustofsky: Too many rules for you, Dad?
Krusty the Christian: Exactly the opposite. They told me I can do anything I want and still go to Heaven as long as I repent right before I die. That’s a bad message for a guy addicted to forty-three different kinds of painkillers.
Task: Make Krusty the Christian Lose His Religion (4h, Krusty Burger)
When task is complete
Jesus Christ: Bad news, Dad. We lost Krusty.
God: Tell me he didn’t become a Hindu. Vishnu always rubs it in my face.
Jesus Christ: Relax. He spent the last five hours worshiping a bottle of bourbon.
Whoa!! Nothing says Christmas Holiday like a lapsed Christian, and a character designed only for that task! PASS!
BUT, IT GETS WORSE…
When final act starts (On New Years Day…my birthday), the “Special Holiday Premium Item” we can buy is… wait for it…wait for it… Aaron Burr and the Hall of Vice Presidents!
If you have seen “Hamilton,” (and if you haven’t, you have been under a rock for the past few years), you know that Aaron Burr was a Vice President who set an unusual precedent, of being the one, and only sitting member of the executive branch to actually shoot a political rival…and get away with it.
As it is explained in Wiki, “Burr shot his political rival Alexander Hamilton in an 1804 duel, during the last full year of his single term as vice president. He was never tried for the illegal duel and all charges against him were eventually dropped, but Hamilton’s death ended Burr’s political career.”
And you thought modern politics were whacky…or that the “carry and conceal” laws were too lenient. A sitting VP shot a guy…and got away with it. Let that sink in while you’re having your Christmas goose.
I can’t remotely understand why he (or his animatronic Doppleganger) is part of our game…especially during the holiday season. To say that Burr represents a “low point” in our history would not be remotely accurate, but he clearly doesn’t belong in our towns…as a full character. PASS!
I get it.
The Simpsons has always been irreverent.
But, this much random meandering…during what is SUPPOSED to be the Best Event of the Year…with such weird, pointedly mean-spirited dialogue, is both lazy and insulting.
It is clear that the writers and EA are having a hell of a time trying to tie content into some form of a story that has any continuity whatsoever. So, to make it EAsy…they pull up Abe, who by nature rambles and meanders without context.
I can only hope that this is not a precursor for the rest of the updates for 202o. It is barely playable…and works hard to offend everyone. Cool. Good job. You succeeded.
In the meantime…I am going to do my best to forget this update, and the insanity in Washington (and London) and have a good time celebrating family and fun in New Orleans over the New Year. And boy…does it ever feel like we NEED a fresh start…with a new direction…and a semblance of common sense and unity.
Here’s to positive change in the coming year. May your holiday season be blessed with family, friends, fun, and less tapping.
Nothing good ever comes from reading the dialog.
#FestivusForTheRestOfUs
Well I for one feel that your postings conveys my thoughts & feelings fairly accurately. Not sure how these little in-between “skits” have become “events”?!.. I think I play mostly out of habit nowadays. I was thinking the other day there’s so much content to draw from,,they could re-format the popular Stonecutter theme with a 12 day riddle thing leading up to Christmas…but I do believe EA has pulled the plug on TSTO given to how much detail they put in now. & now all the character doubles they’re putting in the game makes my brain hurt. That was 1 of the top reasons I quit Family Guy TQFS. & now EA’s doing that. Too many Homers,,2 Marge’s,,don’t forget the weird baby versions!! I don’t mind the skins cuz they’re so easy to forget… this strange Krusty that I can’t seem to recall could’ve just been a skin to forget. Anyways,,I just think the 2 great events that we wait for have gone by the wayside does not bode well for Tapped Out.
Totally agree…with all you wrote.
I love the Stonecutter idea. Hint, Hint EA!
Patric, hope you have a great holiday and birthday in New Orleans.
As I’ve said before, I think EA is making it so disappointing to play this game anymore, they are waiting for so many players to quit the game altogether before they shut it down so they can blame us for the game failure (lack of players) not because they have become so “lazy” in making the game pleasurable…it’s just too damn easy to tap every few hours, and no brain cells needed to complete tasks…..hell my dog can play this game with ease.
As of a few days ago it doesn’t pay me to play anymore except to tap only the tasks a couple times a day. I reached the maximum in game cash allowed and have over 35,000 donuts, and am at the item limits. What’s there to play for anymore? There’s nothing to spend money on, can’t place whatever I’d buy anyway without storing things . No sense in buying rat traps to get more donuts since I have more then I’ll ever need and besides with my bonus % I sill can’t get rid of enough cash to put in the time to buy thousands of RT’s to get rid of some of that cash. There’s no reason to tap buildings or send town folk on tasks to earn money when I can’t earn any.
Thanks EA for slowly killing the once very enjoyable game and blaming us for its demise. Just my opinion!
It’s still fun playing tag with one of my best neighbors almost every day though!!!….you know who you are, and by the way, you’re the only one I tag.
Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all of you.
Merry Christmas and happy holidays to you too!
“Thanks EA for slowly killing the once very enjoyable game and blaming us for its demise. Just my opinion!”
I could not have said it better…
Are you ever satisfied? All you do is gripe about this game. Idk why i even read your inane postings, because it’s always the same lack of appreciation for something you claim to enjoy yet somehow see fit to complain about at every turn. Here’s an idea: Quit.
LOL! I love it when one of the true “Bliss Ninny EA Apologists” comes out of the darkness to attack my “character.” The fact is…the game is so boring at this point, I don’t need to play much to “get it all,” so I don’t need to quit. EA is slowly, but surely quitting us.
Can you honestly tell me that this “event” remotely measures up to one from 2012-2018??? Not. Even. Close.
Matt
It’s constructive criticism …. there will be times when we can thank EA (and what team of techs there still is) for maintaining TSTO as a Game App …. and there are going to be times when EA needs to know what’s not working (as in encouraging one to Tap).
Yes, discussions happen here on TSTO Addicts, but they don’t end here. Myself, along with other Tappers, take the time to use Twitter, Facebook, EA’s Official Forums, to get our opinions – good and bad – out to EA (it’s an immediate way for EA to understand what’s working vs what isn’t).
This is still a popular Game App, but that’s not going to last if half arse attempts to delivery Events continue (and there are still issues involving Item Limits to lack of Land available, even a load screen audible noise that still hasn’t been fixed).
You will see positive comments (when deserved) and you will see criticism (when deserved). Unfortunately, you’re seeing more criticism, because there is no defending how bad EA has allowed TSTO to become.
🤘🤣👍
My advice Patric, forget about all the outside noise and chaos and just enjoy your family over the holidays. These times are precious, not just to you, but to the younger generations. I say this not to belittle your thoughts about the event but as someone struggling greatly having to face my first Christmas without my beautiful dad.
I am so sorry that you lost your Dad, RT. I know the feeling…and only hope for your healing soon. I lost mine on my birthday…New year’s Day, 2012…and it still hurts every year.
So yes…message received.
AND THANK YOU AGAIN for your support for our work in Buyijja! Your monthly donation goes a long way! Watch for my “Thank You Note” next Friday.
Yeh very bad event, rushing all the way through, I would have preferred if ea reused a previous even rather than this non even, will go back to my 24 hour cycle so I can enjoy the real Christmas with my family, ho ho ho let it snow 🎅🤶🎄🎄🎄❄️❄️⛄⛄
Agreed.
I may be in the minority but this was one of the funniest pieces of comedy I’ve heard in a long while. I agree that this content is wrong on so many levels and yet that is what makes it funny. It adds a George Carlin/South Park feel as it is so irreverent that l couldn’t help but chuckle throughout the entire dialogue even though I shouldn’t. Comedy comes in all forms and is rarely universal. For me though, this was hilarious.
It was indeed funny in a “dark humor” sort of way…but, was far from anything remotely resembling a “Holiday/Christmas” vibe.
Well I think we agree that this feels like an event they already had in the can for another release time that the writers cobbled together for a “Christmas” event. It’s ok, I have enough returning items that EA’s handing me eggs and I’m making eggnog.
LOL! Nice! It would just have been nice if they added a little “happy juice” with the event, so your egg nog had a new bit of flavor.
I.
Abraham Jay Simpson II (aka Grandpa Simpson) is (or was) –
Retired
President of the Springfield Gay & Lesbian Alliance
Springfield Communist Party Member (actually, his Brother – William “Bill” Simpson – is mentioned as a Communist in the beginning of “Million-Dollar Abie” (16th Episode, Season 17)
https://youtu.be/CQRzHART71A
World War II Navy Pilot Veteran (along with his Brother Cyrus Simpson, who crashed his plane in Tahiti, stayed there and has 15 Wives – it’s a brief mention in “Simpsons Christmas Stories” (9th Episode, Season 17)
Flying Hellfish Member
Owner of Simpson Laser Tag
Night Watchman at the Cranberry Silo
(some of this has been in the Game App, some hasn’t)
Was Married to –
Amber Simpson (in Game Character, Las Vegas Wives)
Mona Simpson (Homer’s Mum, in Game Character)
Rita LaFleur (pictured in New Character Group)
Selma Bouvier (in Game Character)
Tallulah Winkelman (aka Mr. Burns’ Mother, not in Game)
(feel free to add anything I missed, because that’s a lot for the Simpsons Writers to riff on in this Game App).
II.
I’ve gotten thru this lackluster December Event taking it like the Father’s Day Event we never got, but I’m not defending the dumb things EA has done in the Game App (nobody should). I can only be grateful for what appeals to me.
Besides a Female Character I recognize as Rita LaFleur (I don’t recognize the Male Character with the camera), if this is the end of Simpsons Family Reunion? if this is being reduced to just another Krusty the Clown Character Skin? (like we don’t have enough?) if this is involving a minor scene from “Tis the 30th Season” (10th Episode, Season 30) that’s not even the funniest (animatronic Aaron Burr in the Hall of Vice Presidents at Kissimmee St. Nick Theme Park and Resort)? Then I Tap Out from the next Weekly Events (I’ve got better things to do away from TSTO that are more meaningful) …. from here on out? it’s just concentrating on content that I don’t have from whatever Mystery Box! 🙄
III.
With regards to decisions by EA and The Simpsons Writers – it’s always been very ‘hit or miss’! I see a whole lotta miss this month, I got zero expectations …. but I’d like to see 2020 start out better than 2019 in this Game App!
Pagan Christmas – there were some amusing (Willie as a Horned God) along with some stupid (Star Suit Maggie sacrificing plush toys at altar) things about that Event (but I will never forget the amount of hate it generated in TSTO Addicts!)
Santa Claus – I still lol at the Visual Task where he gets naked (and yes he is voiced) / Mrs. Claus – has a Task to ‘Sing Bawdy Carols’ (it’s not Visual, she’s not voiced – I didn’t have a problem with that, but then again I prefer her ‘Party with the Elves’ Task) and during the Event she was sent to ‘Projectile Vomit Eggnog’ (I took that as lampooning those like me who don’t do dairy, I got a brief lol out of it, but others didn’t lol at all).
Maybe the humour is getting too juvenile, except that’s the sort of humour both Homer and Bart Simpson tend to laugh at …. and it is the polar opposite of Marge and Lisa Simpson (hey, maybe this Game App needs more Women Writers to balance it all out? I think that I may have found the solution!)
A Nazi portraying Santa Claus this year (even if it’s just a dialogue bubble) was stupid (I’m biased with a good reason, Granddad was a Dunkirk survivor, the Germans almost blew the Town I grew up in – Dover – off the map, so unless it’s Mel Brooks funny Nazi humour? it’s stupid to me!)
I’m going to assume Krusty the Christian is a reference to “The Nightmare After Krustmas” (10th Episode, Season 28), so it’s a wait and see ….. there have been worse decisions (ie the Vatican choosing Joseph Aloisius Ratzinger – a former member of the Hitlerjugend that also served in an antiaircraft unit as a Nazi Soldier – as Pope Benedict XVI!)
May all be Festive (in Game, away from Game), may there be less Cheeto complexion in the news media (and disheveled white hair) and may there be more Peace !✌🏻🤶🎄❄️☃️🦌🎅
CJBROWNLV
HI CJ, I was reading some of the older posts I missed and came across this one. I am really LMAO, at the last paragraph of your post. I truly love it. Kudos. 😎😁🙌😛
crazymom732
Merry Christmas (thank Alissa, Patric, Safi, Willie for offering up a wonderful place for Simpsons Fans to share their thoughts) 🦌🎅❄️🎄☃️
And by all means please have a look at Alissa’s traditional Addicts Twas The Mighty post (as usual, it is great ) 😊👍🏻
Had anybody tried to read the writing on the possible hand grenade. In Santa s hand. Picture in this post. I tried to blow it up but still can’t make it out.
Can any Tech savvy folk’s make that obvious text readable?
Been playing more other games lately (started a new SimCity town)..down to checking in once a day and buying (speeding up) the event prizes with donuts. Time to take a complete break. See you all in January. 😬
Have a wonderful holiday!!!💚🎁🎄🎅
Thanks Sandy…hope you have a wonderful Christmas and New Year!
🎄😁☃️
ebron
We may need an Open Thread here on TSTO Addicts for suggesting other mobile Game Apps (I ♥️ the Simpsons, but this Event is turning from “yeah I can appreciate the new Simpsons Relatives” into “not worth the time because it’s gotten stupid”)
However you celebrate December, may it be festive and peaceful. 🦌☃️❄️🎄🌟
CJ….Thanks for the good wishes….hope you have a happy holiday season. ❄️😁❄️
Unbelievable is really all I have to say. Thank you Patric for the upcoming dialogue, now I can skip right through it. I’m waiting for this event to be over.
I have a feeling many Tappers will (unless you are a Noob in search of content you don’t have from prior Events) ….. there isn’t enough to justify Tapping next Week if you’ve gotten everything this Week.
Maybe I wasn’t reading the dialog closely enough, but I took it that a Nazi was posing as Santa, not that the “real” Santa was a Nazi.
Either way….yikes.😒
Nazi posing as Santa Claus in dialogue bubble (it was stupid, not clever, not funny – to me) …. we’ve had better humour in this Game App that wasn’t so juvenile (I think EA needs more Women Writers for TSTO from Fox – Disney).
Now THAT is an interesting point. The “heart” has gone out of the writing in both the game and the series.
I feel it has, Sir. We had some clever Events in the past …. but the Events have gotten stupid.