Black History Month 2020: Full Dialogue Week 1, No Laughing Matter

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

It’s update time in Springfield!  And after 8 years of TSTO, we’re finally tackling Black History Month!  No time like the present for EA, huh?   What’s in store for us this time?  Well, we’re tasked with finding out the history of Dr. Hibbert, Carl, Lou, and the Simpson Family!

Now that we’re wrapping up week 1 of the event, it’s time to look back at the dialogue.  Just in case you missed it by tappin’ too fast…

Happy Valentine’s Day!  Is there a better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day than with the love story of how Dr. Hibbert and Bernice met?  I think not! 🙂

Since we didn’t post this with the rundown…mostly because EA didn’t send it until this week…here’s the synopsis from EA for the event:

For Springfield’s first official celebration of Black History Month, Mayor Quimby taps three of
Springfield’s most prominent black citizens — okay, the only three he actually knows — to share their
personal stories. They are joined by Grampa Simpson with a surprise story about a forgotten cultural hero with an important impact on modern Springfield — and this game!

And for Week 1…

Dr. Hibbert relates the story of how he met and wooed his future wife, in spite of some questionable
advice from Moe. But just when everything seems to be going Hibbert’s way, he finds himself saddled
with a deadbeat brother-in-law.

In Your Own Words
Auto starts

Quimby: Well, if it isn’t Springfield’s most esteemed doctor, policeman, and… friend of Lenny’s.
Carl: The name is Carl, Mayor.
Quimby: Yes. Carl Mayor. How could I, of all people, forget a name like that? Anyway, this year Springfield is hosting its first public celebration of, uh, February History Month.
Dr Hibbert: You mean Black History Month?
Quimby: I, er, uh, do not see color. On an unrelated note, would you three colorless gentlemen be interested in speaking at this event for no particular reason whatsoever?
Lou: Tell you what. We’ll speak at your event if you can name three black American mayors.
Quimby: Er uh… Martin Luther? No, that guy was a King, not a Mayor.
Make Lou Grill Mayor Quimby- 6s, Earns $35, 1xp
Make Mayor Quimby Sweat- 6s, Earns $35, 1xp
Quimby: Alright, I give up! I don’t know any black mayors. Although to be fair, I don’t know any white ones either. But will you please speak at this event?
Lou: Sorry, Mayor. I have to protect the streets. They say “crime waits for no man”.
Wiggum: That’s time, Lou. Not crime.
Lou: Oh, you’re correcting me now? That’s it! I’m taking the day off for this event.

No Laughing Matter Pt. 1
Auto starts

Lisa: Dr. Hibbert, I’m doing a Black History report on the black person I look up to most. Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, and Octavia Butler have all passed away, so can I interview you?
Dr. Hibbert: Absolutely. It’s an honor to be fourth on such a short list.
Lisa: You weren’t fourth, and it was a very long list. Could you tell me about how you became a doctor?
Dr. Hibbert: Sure! It almost didn’t happen. I was dangerously close to flunking out of medical school. My grades were perfect, but I kept laughing at inappropriate times, like the skinny fellow in that Joker movie. I forget the name of the character he played.
Make Dr. Hibbert Set the Scene for Lisa- 4hrs
Collect Stethoscopes- x400.
(on job start)
Dr. Hibbert: The year was 1975. Or 1995. Depending on what season this is, and how old I am as a character.
Lisa: Huh?
Dr. Hibbert: I had a proud, round, well-moisturized Afro. Which was either current or retro at the time. And so did this beautiful woman who walked into my life.
Lisa: Pam Grier?
Dr. Hibbert: I wish! *chuckles*”
(on job end)

Bernice Hibbert: Are you Julius Hibbert?
Dr. Hibbert: Fortunately for me, I am. And who might you be, gorgeous? An angel that fell from heaven, dislocated her shoulder, and now needs me to reset it?
Bernice Hibbert: Close. I’m here to hand you these documents.
Dr. Hibbert: Documents?
Bernice Hibbert: Julius Hibbert, consider yourself a mildly successful urban dance battle movie, because You Got Served!
Dr. Hibbert: Served? Wait, who are you? And what year is this exactly?! The movie You Got Served won’t come out until 2004!

No Laughing Matter Pt. 2
Auto starts

Dr. Hibbert: So I went to drown my sorrows at Moe’s Tavern, which was a hit with all the med students back then. Before that deadly radon leak that took so many of their promising young lives… *chuckles*
Moe: You got served? By, like, a waitress in a sit down restaurant? *sigh* Maybe that’ll be me one day.
Dr. Hibbert: No, you borderline hobo. I’m getting sued! *sigh* I’m not even licensed to practice medicine yet. This could ruin me!
Moe: You want my dangerously unqualified opinion?
Dr. Hibbert: Not when you preface it like that.
Moe: You gotta win this woman’s heart. If you charm her, then maybe she can convince her client not to sue you.
Dr. Hibbert: Hmm. That’s just crazy…
Moe: …enough to work?
Dr. Hibbert: No, I had completed my sentence. But perhaps some unseen dialogue will convince me.
Make Dr. Hibbert Consider Moe’s Bad Advice- 4hrs
Collect Stethoscopes- x350.
Bernice Hibbert: Not-Yet-a-Dr. Hibbert! What are you doing here?
Dr. Hibbert: Well, I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind. So a friend convinced me to follow my heart, come down here, and sing Jodeci songs to you until you agree to go out with me and drop that lawsuit.  “Eeevery time I close my eeeyes….”
Bernice Hibbert: *calls security*

No Laughing Matter Pt. 3
Auto starts

Dr. Hibbert: Moe, that was a disaster!
Moe: Hm. Maybe this skirt is one of them classy dames. The kind what don’t like you callin’ em a skirt or a dame. I got it! How’s about you get her some flowers. All the ladies I watch through binoculars LOVE flowers.
Dr. Hibbert: …
Moe: It’s not what you think. The ladies are on my neighbor’s television. And lucky for me, he died with the TV on. Heh heh heh.
Make Dr. Hibbert Buy Flowers at a Random Store- 4hrs
Collect Stethoscopes- x300.
(on job start)
Dr. Hibbert: An Adult Skateboard shop? Does that mean you sell skateboards for adults who can’t let go of the past, or erotically-themed skateboards for athletic perverts?
Squeaky Voice Attendant: Both!
Dr. Hibbert: Understood. You wouldn’t happen to sell flowers here too, would you?
Squeaky Voice Attendant: We do for the purposes of this quest objective!

(on job end)
Dr. Hibbert: Bernice, I’m sorry for how I acted before. I didn’t realize your law offices frowned upon lewd karaoke. I got you these flowers as a token of my olive branch.
Bernice Hibbert: Are those roses?
Dr. Hibbert: Yes. Their delicate beauty reminds me of you.
Bernice Hibbert: *throat closes up*
Dr. Hibbert: An allergic reaction! Perhaps you’re a bit more delicate than they are. *chuckles*

No Laughing Matter Pt. 4
Auto starts

Dr. Hibbert: Well, look who’s still alive! I’m glad you found your EpiPen. I was afraid I’d have to perform an emergency tracheotomy, and we haven’t gotten to that chapter in med school yet.
Bernice Hibbert: Even though you almost killed me, I’m glad you were there to keep me from dying.
Dr. Hibbert: The pleasure was all mine. I brought you some rice pudding from the hospital cafeteria.
Bernice Hibbert: My favorite! How did you know?
Dr. Hibbert: It said so on your MedicAlert bracelet.
Bernice Hibbert: Ooh. I like a man who pays attention to detail.
Dr. Hibbert: I know. It also said that on your MedicAlert bracelet too. That thing is quite a read.
Make Dr. Hibbert Woo Bernice with Poetry- 4hrs
Collect Stethoscopes- x400.
Dr. Hibbert: I apologize for my spirited performance. When I researched the works of Poet Laureate Dolemite, I did not realize his stanzas would be peppered with so many expletives.
Bernice Hibbert: Life is never boring around you, is it Julius?
Dr. Hibbert: Why don’t you stick around and find out? *kiss*

No Laughing Matter Pt. 5
Auto starts

Dr. Hibbert: Darling, these past few months with you have been a dream. I finished medical school, got a residency, and your client agreed to drop the lawsuit against me.
Bernice Hibbert: Well, he didn’t agree to it so much as die. You can’t charge legal fees to a dead man. Believe me, my law firm has tried!
Dr. Hibbert: *gasp* He didn’t die from medical negligence, did he?
Bernice Hibbert: Heavens, no. He was mauled by a panda at the Springfield Zoo.
Dr. Hibbert: Oh thank God! *chuckles*
Bernice Hibbert: Say, since we’ve gotten so serious, I think it’s time you met my family. Particularly my slacker brother, Chester. Do you think you could take him under your wing and mentor him? Help him become a staid, somber, serious man like you.
Dr. Hibbert: *chuckles for far too long* I don’t see why not.
Make Dr. Hibbert Mentor Chester Dupree- 4hrs
Collect Stethoscopes-x475.Dr. Hibbert: And that’s the story of how I met your mother.
Lisa: I’m not your child.

And this concludes Week 1, of the 2020 Black History Month Event!

Thoughts on the first week? Dialogue? Ready for week 2? Thoughts on the event in general?  Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!