If you’ve been zapping through your tapping and it’s all been a bit of a blur or if you just fancied a reminder of what the writers got up to this time you’re in luck.
Here’s all the dialog and tasks for Act 1 . . .
PS – No, you’re not losing the plot …
This is up late and Act 2 is underway !!
What’s in this post
• Intro quest: The Warm Days of Summer
• Act 1 Prize track: Tee’s Up parts 1 to 5
Intro quest: The Warm Days of Summer
The Warm Days of Summer:
Kent Brockman: …with that, Springfield and the tri-city area expect great weather for the next few weeks.
Kent Brockman: And someone please tell me why this award-winning action news anchor is doing weather?
Kent Brockman: My producers tell me our regular weather guy…never learned his name, quit.
Kent Brockman: He’s smart to quit. I’m done. Everyone watching, go outside and see the weather for yourselves!
Moe: Aw, crud. Nice weather means people enjoy BBQs, throw Frisbees, and spend time with their lousy families! Which means they spend less time in this lousy dump.
Barney: There’s also water parks, zoos, strawberry festivals…
Homer: That’s too much fresh air for me.
Lenny: *bursting in* Sky Finger’s back, and it’s got a new building!
Moe: Sky Finger’s always givin’ me the finger when I don’t need it!
• Make Homer Run Outside to See – 6 seconds
• Make Barflies Run Outside to See – x 3, 6 seconds
• Make Moe Get His Shotgun – 6 seconds
Sky Finger: *pulls building out of the void*
Carl: Ooh-la-la, Springfield Glen Country Club. Nice!
Barney: Aww. I was hoping it’d be a place that I could enjoy. Like a park bench or a cinder pile near some railroad tracks.
Moe: Barney’s right. None of my regular bums can afford a place like that. This ain’t gonna be so bad after all.
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP
Unlocks the prize track and Store items when completed
Prize track: Tee’s Up parts 1 to 5
Tee’s Up, part 1:
Quimby: Ahh, Springfield Glen. I’ve made many memories and closed many business deals on those links.
Fat Tony: I too have fond memories. Many of these are buried under the sand trap on the 14th hole.
Quimby: Say, want to play a round or two?
Fat Tony: And walk on the graves of my enemies? Alas, I should not be spotted in the vicinity.
Quimby: All right, guess it’s just me. I’d like my old regular tee time, please.
Squeaky Voice Teen: One moment. *tapping on keyboard* Uh, sir? There’s a bit of a problem…
Squeaky Voice Teen: You’ve been a member of Springfield Glen for over a decade, but we have no record of your dues ever being paid.
Quimby: There must be some mistake.
Squeaky Voice Teen: That’s what the computer is saying, sir.
Quimby: Whom are you going to believe? A computer or the corrupt mayor of this fine city?
• Collect Golf Tees – x 100 
• Make Springfielders Investigate the New Building – x 5, 4 hours
• Make Quimby Demand to Speak to a Manager – 4 hours
• Make Squeaky Voice Teen Regret Applying to Work Here – 4 hours
Quimby: Counselor, please inform this incompetent teenager that I am an upstanding member of this club and grant me a tee time.
Blue Haired Lawyer: Mr. Mayor, I’m afraid I can’t do that. Squeaky Voice Teen is correct. You have not paid dues for your membership for over a decade.
Quimby: But the building just arrived! It didn’t exist prior to today.
Blue Haired Lawyer: And yet, you collected taxes on this property before its return to Springfield.
Blue Haired Lawyer: If you force the club to litigate, you will lose.
Quimby: This is a new feeling for me — being taken advantage of by my constituents — the very ones I take advantage of!
Blue Haired Lawyer: However, the club has agreed, if you pay your back dues, they will reinstate your membership.
Quimby: Fine. I’ll get them their money, and then we’ll see who has the last laugh. Ha-ha er…Ha-er ha!
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP and decoration: Golf Course Fountain
The Fountain will only go on River Tiles !!
Tee’s Up, part 2:
Miss Springfield: Joe? What’s the matter?
Quimby: I’m looking for an overstuffed bag full of cash I left here.
Miss Springfield: You mean this? *holds up a large canvas bag with a dollar sign drawn on it*
Quimby: Yes! That’s it!
Miss Springfield: I thought the $ stood for Mi$$ $pringfield.
Miss Springfield: Also mi$tress. And divor$e.
Quimby: Er, uh, yeah. I’ll bet it doesn’t stand for $mart.
• Collect Golf Tees – x 125
• Make Springfielders Crowd the Gates to Springfield Glen – x 5, 4 hours
• Make Quimby Return With the Overstuffed Money Bag – 4 hours
Wiggum: All right, back up everyone.
Quimby: Chief Wiggum, what’s going on here?
Wiggum: Now that it’s back, the entire town is trying to peek inside the Country Club. I’m here to stop the peeking.
Quimby: Good job, Officer. Now, if you’ll just let me by—
Wiggum: Sorry, members only.
Quimby: But, but…
Wiggum: That’s right. Get your non-member butt outta here.
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP and character: Susan
Earns event currency when unlocked
Tee’s Up, part 3:
Quimby: What do you mean I’m not allowed in?
Wiggum: The club gave me a list of members, and you’re not on it.
Quimby: I need to go IN to fix that issue!
Blue Haired Lawyer: Chief Wiggum, there’s been a bit of a misunderstanding.
Quimby: Ha! In your face, officer of the law!
Wiggum: There’s too much drama here. I’m going back to the squad car for a cat nap.
Blue Haired Lawyer: My apologies, Mayor Quimby.
Quimby: That’s all right. Besides, I’ve brought my membership dues.
Blue Haired Lawyer: Yes, about that. We need to have a conversation.
Quimby: Dear God. I never like when lawyers “need to have a conversation”.
• Collect Golf Tees – x 100
• Make Springfielders Try to Bribe Wiggum to Get Inside – x 5, 4 hours
• Make the Blue-Haired Lawyer Clear His Throat – 4 hours
• Make Quimby Test the Heft of the Money Bag – 4 hours
Blue Haired Lawyer: Since its return, Springfield Glen Country Club has seen an explosion in popularity among our city’s finest. Its membership has ballooned.
Quimby: There’s always room for the finest of the fine — the Mayor!
Blue Haired Lawyer: I regret to inform you…Springfield Glen is no longer accepting new members. The offer to reinstate you has been rescinded.
Quimby: So I ran around town with this large sack of money for nothing?
Snake: Not for nothing. Yoink! *snatches the sack out of Quimby’s hands and runs* You just helped me!
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP and Mystery Box token
Tee’s Up, part 4:
Quimby: Those small-minded idiots at Springfield Glen think that they can have a club that I’m not allowed in? Diamond Joe Quimby gets in whatever club he wants!
Frink: Ahh, Springfield Glen…with the hoyvin-glavin-loop-de-loops and the doyvin-dodgin lower taxes to infinity!
Quimby: Lisa Simpson, please translate what this goofball is saying.
Lisa: Professor Frink is saying there’s a loophole in the tax code that lets places like Springfield Glen pay much lower property taxes than they should.
Lisa: They’re charged the same rate as ranchers and farmers who worked these lands in the 1800s for playing the fairways today.
Quimby: So, if the loophole was closed, they’d be forced to pay much more today.
Frink: Plotzing and plotting, scuttle-scheming a bucket of dastardly-do-wrongs!
Quimby: What’s he saying?
Lisa: Sounds like you’re up to no good.
• Collect Golf Tees – x 115
• Make Quimby Draft Legislation in His Head – 4 hours
• Make Lisa Worry How Responsible She Is – 4 hours
• Make Professor Frink Promote His Podcast – 4 hours
Frink: …my podcast covers many different social stratas that uphold our boysen-hoyvin society—
Quimby: I still don’t get the Professor. But no matter. Thank you, Miss Simpson. Joe Quimby never forgets a good deed!
Lisa: When all I want you to do is forget that my good deed helped you.
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP and decoration: Springfield Glen Entrance
Tee’s Up, part 5:
Smithers: Do you smell that, Mr. Burns? Freshly-cut grass, the wind in the trees…pure solitude and peace.
Burns: Quit your waxing on and fetch my clubs. With Springfield Glen finally reopened, it’s time to reclaim my Thursday morning tee time.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Mr. Burns, may I extend to you the full hospitality of Springfield Glen Country Club and thank you for your generous—
Burns: Skip the pleasantries. Just hand me my score card.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Well, about that… With the increased membership, we’ve needed to add another golfer to your tee time.
Smithers: Oh, that won’t work for Mr. Burns. He despises most people.
Burns: Hold your mashie, Smithers. It’s been a while since I made a friend on the links. Who is this chum I’ll be clubbing with?
• Collect Golf Tees – x 165
• Make the Squeaky Voice Teen Look Up Mr. Burns’ Partner – 4 hours
• Make Burns Prepare to Crush His Opponent – 4 hours
• Make Smithers Be Certain Something Will Go Wrong – 4 hours
Squeaky Voice Teen: Here’s your partner. Mr. Amadopolis?
Smithers: Oh dear.
Aristotle Amadopolis: C. Montgomery Burns! Fancy seeing you here!
Burns: There must be some mistake. What is he doing in this Springfield members-only establishment?
Aristotle Amadopolis: The Shelbyville Country Club is still missing. The previous incident at your plant seems to have changed the layout of this city, so why not come here and see what all the fuss is about.
Aristotle Amadopolis: This is quite nice, even if their taste in members leaves a bit to be desired.
Burns: Smithers, put my clubs back in the Stutz. I’ll play next week when this grifter is gone.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Sir, Mr. Amadopolis has reserved this time slot in perpetuity, the same as you. You’ll be playing together every week.
Burns: Smithers, release the hounds!
Smithers: They’re all back at the house, sir.
Burns: Then release the squirrels or bunny rabbits! Release something!
Reward: 200 $$s, 20 XP and building: Burns’ Hounds’ Quarters
That wraps things up for Act 1 ( finally !! ).
The Act 2 Turbo Tappin’ is all set for Saturday morning.
