Right then, you’ve got your Rundown and Turbo Tappin’ up so lets take a look at the premium offering for this act …
Dimwillie + Dimwillies.
As ever this isn’t exactly a Should I Buy, more like it’s a look at what you get if you decide to spend those Donuts so you can make your own minds up.
Here’s what’s in this post:
• Basic info
• Questline with Dialog
• Permanent tasks
Lets get started then, shall we . . .
Basic info:
• Cost: 150 Donuts
• Name: Dimwillie
• Type: Character
• Premium: Yes
• Voiced: No
• Questline: Yes
• Animated Job(s): Yes – 1 and 24 hour jobs
Earns event currency
Bundled with:
• Name: Dimwillies
• Type: Building
• Built: 6 seconds
• Earns: 135 $$s and 15 XP every 4 hours
• Job(s): Yes – Dimwillie, Bart
Bart has a 4 hour task, Reluctantly Cheat On Krusty Burger
Questline with Dialog:
This starts when you compete the event, or the event ends
Law & Side Orders, part 1:
Wiggum: Hey Dimwillie, looks like you ordered a burger with a side of demise, because you’re under arrest for MURDER, scumbag!
Dimwillie: What?!
Wiggum: Man, that felt good! Sorry, was that too over the top? I don’t really get to accuse people of murder a lot. Tried to throw a little Dennis Franz in there.
Dimwillie: Oh yeah, I did feel a little Sipowicz flavor.
Dimwillie: One problem, though: I haven’t killed anyone!
Wiggum: Oh yeah? Well look at poor, dead Laird Ladd here. Looks like your hamburger army eighty-sixed him!
Wiggum: That’s restaurant slang that means they killed him. Trying to work a little Gordon Ramsay into this arrest too.
• Make Wiggum Accuse Dimwillie of Murder – 4 hours
• Make Dimwillie Protest His Innocence – 4 hours
Laird Ladd: What are you two boobs yelling about?! Can’t an old man nap in peace around here?
Wiggum: Mr. Ladd, you’re alive?! I assumed you were dead because you didn’t answer any of my texts.
Wiggum: Unless you were g-g-g-ghosting me!
Laird Ladd: I gave your text a thumbs up, that counts as texting back! Now which one of you dolts left these giant donut crumbs and jelly filling all over the floor here?
Wiggum: Giant donut crumbs? Jelly filling? Oh my gosh! Someone killed Lard Lad!
Wiggum: Dimwillie, it was you!
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP
Law & Side Orders, part 2:
Wiggum: Hey Dimwillie, looks like you ordered another burger with a side of demise, because you’re—
Dimwillie: This again? I didn’t kill Lard Lad either!
Wiggum: C’mon, give me another shot at this. I’m so close!
Dimwillie: Well, how do we know it wasn’t you?
Wiggum: You think I’d have the willpower to leave those crumbs behind?
Laird Ladd: He’s got you there.
• Make Wiggum Accuse Dimwillie of Murder…Again – 4 hours
• Make Dimwillie Try to Influence the Investigation – 4 hours
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP
Law & Side Orders, part 3:
Dimwillie: I didn’t do it, Chief! Look, I don’t want to tell you how to do your job, but—
Wiggum: Why doesn’t anyone ever want to tell me how to do my job? This is really hard and I could use some guidance!
Dimwillie: Didn’t you have to go through the police academy?
Wiggum: It was mostly watching “21 Jump Street” and going undercover in a local high school. Never got so many wedgies in my life…
Dimwillie: How hard could it be to find out who killed a giant donut spokesman?
Wiggum: You’re right! The first thing I have to do is get down to the basics of police investigation…
Dimwillie: Establish a timeline, motive, and find a murder weapon?
Wiggum: No, I need to go undercover! Now what kind of wig should I go with, ’70s afro or ’80s mullet?
Dimwillie: Ugh, I’ll just do it myself…
• Make Dimwillie Look for Clues – 4 hours
Dimwillie: Nothing! Boy, TV makes everything look easier than it is in real life.
Moe: Tell me about it. I tried smuggling one of them Baby Yodas, and those things bite!
Dimwillie: I’m trying to solve a murder here, not carry around a Muppet.
Moe: Who died?
Dimwillie: Someone killed Lard Lad, and they’re trying to frame me for it.
Moe: Y’know, there are some giant footprints over by the Bowlarama…
Dimwillie: Giant footprints? That can only mean one thing!
Moe: Yeah — the guy that’s trying to frame you has really big feet!
Dimwillie: No, you goon, it means Lard Lad’s still alive!
Reward: 100 $$s, 10 XP
Law & Side Orders, part 4:
Dimwillie: Lard Lad?! You’re alive!
Dimwillie: And sweeping a bowling alley?
Sentient Lard Lad: I’m not sweeping — it’s curling night at the bowling alley.
Dimwillie: What the heck is curling?
Sentient Lard Lad: It’s the national sport of Canada after ice hockey, lacrosse, Canadian football, and maybe baseball if the Blue Jays are winning. And it’s my real passion!
Dimwillie: So, what, you faked your death?
Sentient Lard Lad: Yeah. I thought Wiggum would think Laird Ladd did it and lock him away, and then I’d be free to pursue my dream.
Dimwillie: Of being a curling star?
Sentient Lard Lad: No, there’s no such thing as a curling star. Even if you win a world championship, you’re still just a person who’s good at an obscure sport no one’s heard of.
Sentient Lard Lad: My actual dream is just not having to promote cheap donuts for that wrinkled old tyrant anymore.
Laird Ladd: I heard that!
• Make Lard Lad Try to Explain Curling – 4 hours
• Make Laird Ladd Tell Lard Lad to Get Back to Work – 4 hours
• Make Dimwillie Try to Understand Curling – 4 hours
Wiggum: Well, I guess I owe you an apology for accusing you of murdering Laird Ladd. And then accusing you of murdering Lard Lad.
Dimwillie: Don’t forget making me spend hours rehearsing with you so you could “get into character” when you went undercover.
Wiggum: Hey, one slip-up and I woulda been toast!
Dimwillie: You were going undercover as a cop from Shelbyville!
Wiggum: Exactly! They wear grey uniforms and we wear blue, and I’m color blind!
Reward: 200 $$s, 20 XP
Permanent tasks:
( pics )
• Task: Try To Understand Curling
• Time: 1 hour
• Earns: 105 $$s, 26 XP
• Animated: Yes
• Location: Outside – visual
• Task: Get His Lettuce Trimmed
• Time: 4 hours
• Earns: 260 $$s, 70 XP
• Animated: No
• Location: Hairy Shearers, Turn Your Head And Coif, Beefy Bishops Barbershop, Curl Up And Dye, assorted Homes
• Task: Pretend To Be The Mayor
• Time: 8 hours
• Earns: 420 $$s, 105 XP
• Animated: No
• Location: Town Hall, Dimwillies
• Task: Dream Up New Schemes To Win Burger Wars
• Time: 12 hours
• Earns: 600 $$s, 150 XP
• Animated: No
• Location: Dimwillies
• Task: Look For Clues
• Time: 24 hours
• Earns: 1,000 $$s, 225 XP
• Animated: Yes
• Location: Outside – visual
There you have it, over to you. Is this a must-buy, a maybe or a hard-pass?
Your opinions might help any Addict who’s not made up their minds yet so please share your thoughts in the comments.
Back later with a look at the cash offering.