“Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring ting tingling along,
Let’s sing a jolly holiday non-denominational song.”
Oh hey there friends! Happy Life Day and Merry Chrismakwanzafestikkah to you! In our silly lil game, we sometimes see things pop in that we have no clue as to their Origin. They seem familiar, but we just can’t pinpoint from where. So that is why we decided to make a fun lil reminder out of it. To let you know just Where did THAT Come From?
Look kids… it’s Ba-ba-ba-Bing Crosby… I mean The Parson. It’s Act One of the 2016 TSTO Holiday Event and we’re full swing into all the paganism, returning Christmas items, and snow. EA sure took a strange turn for the event but regardless if you love it or hate it, there’s always more free stuff that comes with TSTO events. New stuff means this walking carpet has a job to do and it’s time for me to dojust that. For this round of origins, we’ll be taking a look at Father O’Malley, I mean The Parson. He was available as the 7th prize for Act One of the event for 68,350 antlers. You know the highest ranking clergyman in the Presbylutheran faith, not to be confused with the heathen Luthertarians, is cool when he only shows up in HD episodes.
So the first appearance for our Father O’Malley-inspired character (check out Crosby’s performance in “Going My Way”) comes our way in “Wedding for Disaster” (S20:E15). It’s the episode where Homer and Marge realize their second marriage (yes you read that right… see S8:E6, “A Milhouse Divided”) wasn’t official because Reverend Lovejoy’s ministerial certification had lapsed for three months during the time he remarried them. Seems Lovejoy’s credit card was no good. The Parson is the most saintly person to visit Springfield since Mother Teresa stopped to gas up her Vespa. “The earthly embodiment of the elected chair of the national congress of deacons” according to Lenny. If you were wondering, said mother church is spiritually headquartered in Michigan City, Indiana. He’s “a man like any other who’s been chosen by God,” a guy so cool his arrival makes Ned Flanders faint and then later have mustache tingles. I could just listen to him prattle on forever and several of his TSTO sayings come from this episode.
With Tim (Lovejoy’s first name if you forgot), we discover the Parson was roommate’s with Springfield’s deacon at Texas Christian. The Parson has known the Lovejoy’s a long time, so long he remembers when Helen Lovejoy was Harold Schwarzbaum… we’ll just let that sit for a moment.
Anyhoo… the rest of the episode has a moment with Santa, a lampoon of Saw, and the second re-marriage (making four marriages total) that I mentioned earlier. The next parishonal parson peeping happens in “Moe Letter Blues” (S21:E21). It’s the episode where we learn Springfield’s zip code is 80085 and there’s a Moe-centric story where either Marge, Helen Lovejoy, or Manjula Nahasapeemapetilon gets Moe-jacked. But who is it? Well watch the episode friends but I will show you The Parson in Lovejoy’s flashback. He shows up as Tim’s spiritual advisor when he witnesses the Reverend and Mrs. arguing. He learned in divinity school that if you put your thumb over a ladies mouth… you can see how they’re really feeling.
Wow… I gotta try that one… not. But seriously, I’m always a fan of this character showing up in episodes. Let’s head next to “Penny-Wiseguys” (S24:E5). Not a big appearance but the Parson is now on Ned’s bowling team… the Holy Rollers. I just like that Rabbi Krustofsky is on the team too. Excuse me while I pause and lament about no Hanukkah this year.
Okay, I’m back and over myself. In “Pulpit Friction” (S24:E18), the Simpsons get a new couch just like the old one from Brooklyn and as a result end up infesting the town with bed bugs. The resultant pest infestation and upset citizenry does have the bonus of driving everyone to church. It’s the perfect place to see the Parson. He’s got a golf cart too!
I feel like he’s speaking directly to my time as a TSTO blogger when he advises not letting a few ba-ba-ba-bugs spoil a sunny summer day. Sure it’s currently winter and a holiday event but I get what he’s saying. He’s God’s soldier in cardigan and he shows up just in time to save Reverend Lovejoy’s sermon by bringing a backup reverend named Elijah Hooper (voiced by Edward Norton) who is much hipper and infuses pop culture into his preachiness. This episode also gives us the fun fact that Springfield’s religion was founded by Martin Presbylutheran when he placed his three suggestions under the Pope’s windshield wiper.
Last but certainly not least, the appearance that most likely earned The Parson a spot in our pocket-sized Springfields because the event is basically one episode tie-in that’s too long and polarizing, “The Nightmare After Krustmas” (S28:E10). The attendance at the First Church of Springfield during the fourth Sunday of Advent is very small. The Parson and his boss, the Patriarch, plus Ned, Agnes, and Mel hold a divine intervention at the will of all their bosses, the Metropolitan. Tim is worried it’s become a crime to mix pinot noir and vicodin but the Parson isn’t interested in him wrecking his liver, their more interested in why he’s not packing the pa-pa-pa-pews.
The Parson shows up later to let Reverend Lovejoy there’s a ba-ba-ba-baptism that needs to happen. There’s a lot more in this episode featuring the awesome Parson and even awesomer Wayne Gretzky but I’ll save all that for my episode recap in the future.
That’s all the stuff to talk about for this new character in our towns. What do you think of him? Earn him yet? Like to golf? Bing Crosby? Ever see “All The Way”? One thing is for sure, this is one character I would have spent donuts on and I love having him in my town. I’m praying we all get this awesome addition. Feel free to sound off in the comments and most importantly, happy holiday tapping friends.
TTFN… Wookiee out!