Wowza… EA ended the Superheroes Sequel and then walloped us with the return of the Monorail for everybody. Any tapper who knows me should know how thrilled I am to see the return of this for the game. I actually finally built some track in my town although I’m not completely happy with it and still considering a complete redesign so I can make it pretty. Anyhoo… like most take-downs recently, EA decided to tease some possible future stuff in their update message.
But what the heck does this all mean. Sure it could all just be a joke from the designers but there is usually a kernel of truth within the farce. I decided to do a little thinking and see if I could come up with episodes that might bring stuff to us pertaining to these hints. Here’s what I came up with.
First up… a random set of summer sports. Let me be the first person to say that I see no need for a Tapball Sequel event but somehow this is what I smelled when I saw this dialogue. That event brought us a lot of different sports squeezed into one doozy of an amalgamation.
This event was the very definition of a random set of summer sports. I’m hoping EA has some different ideas but only time will tell. Regardless of how this idea would be delivered to our games… I put on my thinking cap and came up with a list of sports:
1) Softball from “Homer at Bat” (S3:E17) – this is Alissa’s favorite episode. Could EA finally be tipping their hat to our favorite moderator? We got Softball Burns in Tapball so maybe we’ll get more goodness?
2) Hockey from “Lisa on Ice” (S6:E8) – before you try to point out that hockey is a winter sport, I’ll be the fuzzball who will point out that the race for Sir Stanley’s Cup happens during the summer… well, May to June. Sure summer starts a week or two later but I’m the guy from a sunny state who roots for the Kings of hockey so I vote for melty ice skating, checking, and boarding year round.
3) Bowling from “Team Homer” (S7:E12) – okay, bowling may not be a sport but ever since we got Pin Pal Apu I’ve been hoping for the whole team to be included in the game. Bowling could also finally bring us Jacques. He’s been missing ever since Shorty’s arrived in the game.
4) Football from “Bart Star” (S9:E6) – do I really need to plug all the kids playing some foosball? Nelson arrived previously is shoulder pads and helmet so other kids could join the game.
5) Skateboarding Tony Hawk from “Barting Over” (S14:E11) – summer always makes me think of the X-games and unless you really want the Cross Games from “The Food Wife” (S23:E5), I think the episode which included Tony could bring vert ramps and other extreme goodness to the game. Bart and skateboarding are synonymous so more of this would be amazing.
Heck… I’d settle for Grampa having a tasking on a ramp. I know there’s a lot EA could do with this idea.
6) Soccer from “Marge Gamer” (S18:E17) and “You Don’t Have to Live like a Referee” (S25:E16) – Homer already has his ref outfit and Lisa got her soccer outfit so this seems like something that could appear. I’d be a happy walking carpet if EA brought Ronaldo into the game. Also be fun to incorporate the soccer riot.
7) Little League Baseball from “MoneyBART” (S22:E3) – sort of the same idea as pee-wee football for me. Lots of skins, lots of fun, and a tribute to a movie starring Brad Pitt. Seriously, Jonah Hill proved he could act in it.
8) The Duff Extreme BMX Vert Competition from “Barthood” (S27:E9) – yes please. I think I sort of covered my love for extreme sports in #5.
Next up, an invasion by doppelgangers from another dimension. You know, this one was a tough one for me. I had a couple ideas (read #1 and #4) but did a quick search and found a great list over at WikiSimpsons. I don’t often plug that site but they do some good work over there. If you want to see their full list just type in ‘simpsons doppelgangers’ into your search engine. You can also find a funny article about 21 real people who look like Simpsons characters. I cherry-picked ones I liked from the wiki.
1) Guy Incognito from “Fear of Flying” (S6:E11) – the original doppelganger and my personal choice for this tease. I don’t know what dimension he might be from but I’d love to have him wandering my town and can imagine some funny dialogue.
2) Squeaky Voiced Australian Teen from “Bart vs. Australia” (S6:E16) – Australia is sort of another dimension, right? They have drop bears and different seasons than the U.S.
3) Bart, Lisa, and Maggie’s inbred freak doppelgangers in “Lady Bouvier’s Lover” (S5:E21).
3) Apu doppelgangers like the Speed-E-Mart owner from “Lemon of Troy” (S6:E24) and Li’l Valu-Mart clerk from “Summer of 4 Ft. 2” (S7:E25) – honestly these ones weren’t even on my mind but I find them funny so I included them.
4) Lester and Eliza from “The Day the Violence Died” (S7:E18) – my second pick after Guy. Totally weird doppelgangers who derailed Bart and Lisa when they tried to help out. If anyone is from another dimension, it’s these two.
5) Brazilian Yes Guy from “Blame it on Lisa” (S13:E15) – I’m seriously laughing as I imagine people (including my own mother) cringing at another character drawing out the word ‘Si’. I mentioned soccer so a doppelganger from Brazil isn’t a complete stretch.
6) Simon Woosterfeld from “Double, Double Boy in Trouble” (S20:E3) – his family’s hotel is already in the game so why not.
7) Canadian Nelson and Milhoose from “Boy Meets Curl” (S21:E12) – Canada is definitely on a different plan of existence than Springfield. I know a lot of tappers here who would like to see some more Canuck love in the game. TSTO could use an event that is red and white but never blue. Maybe you don’t agree but sorry not sorry.
8) Female Moe from “The Blue and the Gray” (S22:E13) – poor Moe could really use a love interest and although I still cast my vote for Maya, this female version of Mr. Szyslak made me giggle when I first saw it. Proof that “for every man, somewhere out there is one woman” and for Moe it’s somewhere in Europe. Hopefully she’s as bad at offing herself as Moe.
9) Many different Bart and Lisa Doppelgangers from “Homer Goes to Prep School” (S24:E9) – this episode is worth a watch as Homer looks for his kids at Smart Tykes: Dump Your Kids in the Learn Zone! and just finds doppelganger after doppelganger. I’m pretty sure Lester and Eliza were one pair. While I don’t really want these in the game, an event where you had to tap on these a la criminals because of some sort of inter-dimensional rift caused by Frink might be fun.
10) Honestly, the Tracey Ullman show incarnations of our favorite family feel like doppelgangers nowadays. “Treehouse of Horror XXV” did a fun episode with the current and old versions interacting in “The Others” segment.
It also ended with a ton of doppleganger options for the family. I like the Adventure Time version the best. The Minions make me laugh too. Maybe all our doppelgangers will be the result of “an evil marketing entity” like the Marketing Agency in Springfield Heights?
Last up in this round of speculation, the brand-new outlet mall. This one seems really clear… will we finally get the Towne Centre at Springfielde Glenne? We already have a few of the stores (Blocko, Gold Navy, Mapple, Abercrombie and Rich, Banana Dictatorship, Spiffany’s, and Vulgari) from here so why not?
I guess we could also get the Ogdenville Outlet Mall from “Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield” (S7:E14).
So there you go friends. Some fuzzy ideas from yours truly about what the future might hold based on 21 words from EA. What do you think is coming? Any ideas besides mine that you thought of? Would you be ready for another round of Tapball? Sound off in the comments and happy tapping friends.
TTFN… Wookiee out!