Thank Grog It’s Firday!
Wow! So…what a Thanksgiving! Right??
So many new ways to celebrate, without actually celebrating, unless you did celebrate by ignoring common sense, which may or may not have been an actual edict in your hometown, or was just a guideline…which we all know means “do what you want, we have warned you!”
You may think I am talking about Covid regulations. I am not.
I am talking about the vast number of ways people celebrate a holiday which has one of the shakiest origin stories ever…in ways that may or may not actually be putting their lives in immediate danger.
And more to the point…In Which Thanksgiving Traditions do YOU partake, that could be considered “Outside the Norm,” (especially since Norm was not invited this year)?
First of all, you should know that we didn’t celebrate TG on TG…due to a lot of family challenges, which you will all be thankful that I am not going to recount here. We had TG in California…which was planned a long time ago…and was actually adhering well to the “small group mandate” that was in place, because it was just my wife and I, our daughter and her husband. We have all been tested…and re-tested. All clear.
So, after an 8-hour car ride, we had Thanksgiving, the day after Thanksgiving. But, we were plenty thankful.
But, the car trip down did create the first question I am going to ask:
Why does California stop you at the border, at the height of a pandemic, and only ask if you “Have and Produce” in the car?
I know the basic answer…and the fact is, my wife told a minor “white lie,” as she did have some carrots and potatoes in the car that she was bringing for the dinner. But, she reasoned that they were likely GROWN in Cali in the first place…so she was in fact, “just bringing them home.” I love the way this woman thinks.
Then there is the age old question, “Why do they pack the neck inside the bird, along with the giblets? Does anyone actually eat a turkey neck???
The neck(s) pictured above actually came out of a bird that my daughter was preparing. It had TWO necks…and the little “it’s done” button was on the bottom of the bird. I told her it was the height of GMO engineering. Two headed turkeys that walk upside down are a new delicacy among Gen-Xers.
And speaking of “Bird Prep…” Does anyone do the traditional “stuff the bird, sow it up, and cook it” routine anymore? My wife, who makes the best turkeys ever, does not. She makes the “stuffing” on the side. But, If you don’t STUFF it, can you still call it stuffing?
Here is a picture of what my sister attempted, because she didn’t have thread and a needle. I hope those pins were sterilized. It looks like a health hazard waiting to happen, or something they would serve for Thanksgiving at a punk rock show.
And…according to the National Fire Fighter’s Institute, there has been a 34% increase in Thanksgiving Day House Fires due to the number of horrendous “deep fried turkey” accidents. DO YOU DEEP FRY YOUR BIRDS?
And finally…Did You Have a Traditional Turkey meal, or are you part of the new trend in health/animal conscious folks that are eating “meat substitute meals?” 
For me…if you are going to PRETEND to eat meat…I think you should have to kill and prepare your own plants. I mean…what do they put in this stuff anyway???
TOFURKY Ingredients:
ROAST: Water, vital wheat gluten, organic tofu (filtered water, organic whole soybeans, magnesium chloride, calcium chloride), expeller pressed non-genetically engineered canola oil, natural vegetarian flavors, shoyu soy sauce (water, non-genetically engineered soybeans, wheat, salt, culture), non-genetically engineered corn starch, white bean flour, garbanzo bean flour, lemon juice from concentrate, onion, carrots, celery, salt, calcium lactate from beets.
MMMMMM! Nothing says “yummy” like lactating beets!!
So…finally…after all of that, Can You Hear A Soy Bean Scream When You Put It In The Blender??
OK… that’s enough. Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.
Pass the Turkey Neck!
