Episode Recap: Teenage Mutant Milk-Caused Hurdles

Hey hey friends! Wookiee back and at my usual antics and here with another episode recap for my favorite Addicts. Of course, that means it’s time to take a break from tapping bears and celebrating over beautiful Maggie Simpson to catch up on the latest episode that aired on January 10th. Boy does the time fly when you’re having fun. Thankfully we’ve done pretty well this season and aren’t too far behind. The only reason we’re posting recaps a little behind actually has been all the goodness that came with the Holiday Event. Anyhoo… for the unacquainted, one of the features we like to have on this site is recaps of new Simpsons episodes for all our friends who can’t watch them immediately or like our silly reviews of them. I love when there are new episodes of the Best. Show. Ever. on TV. It’s my privilege to not only watch new episodes, which I would do with or without this awesome site, but then break them down for all of you. Without further ado… here’s my thoughts on Season 27, Episode 11: “Teenage Mutant Milk-Caused Hurdles”.

To start this off for accidental clickers who just prefer the synopsis, here’s what IMDb says about the episode:

“After Bart starts drinking a milk substitute filled with bad hormones, he experiences early puberty and grows a little mustache as well as feelings for Mrs. Berrera, his new teacher. Mrs. Berrera winds up in the middle of a romantic rivalry, as she also draws the attention of Principal Skinner. She feels Skinner is a wounded soul that she wants to take care of. She is a vet like Skinner, and that’s his attraction.”

Now on with the random recap observations of yours truly. I did a quick typing sesh while I watched it the first time with my daughter and then watched it once more to clean up my gobbletygook. I think this makes the observations more funny but maybe that’s just me liking a different approach.

– Yay for an intro with Grampa as 2015 baby new year and Maggie as 2016. And cue the awesome 80s intro a la GTA Vice City.  LA-Z Rider. Max Power. Human Bart & Lisa. Ned with Tattoos.  Summation… hilarious goodness. Damn reruns.

– The kids in Bart’s class are running amuk and Willie is not doing well as the sub reading Scottish poetry. They’ve “awakened Scotland’s shame.” The tortured trumpet aka Willie’s bagpipes/vape.  Chalmers announces the class has a new teacher who is a retired Air Force sergeant… Miss  Berrera. The kids are fascinated with her. She learned the most powerful weapon is knowledge while in combat. She built negative three hospitals. Bart is actually interested and acting like a good student. Holy heck… she has a neck tattoo. And apparently Milhouse had a huge crush on Mrs. K.  Dang I miss her still.

– Homer is sober driving with only one beer onboard. Marge reminds him he promised to pick up healthy milk without hormones so he’s off to the Kwik-E-Mart. Apu is shocked that Homer is buying something healthy… Top of the Teat Organic Milk… gently yanked from a cow.  “Now I have seen all of the things that there are to see.” The good stuff is over 16 bucks so Homer opts for Buzz “Milk”, a white breakfast beverage. It has an interesting advertising plan involving science to jazz things up. From the cow through a question mark to your mouth. They can’t say milk legally but Homer buys it anyways.

– Morning time at the Simpson home. Bart up early with combed hair and his face washed and it’s not a court date either. Bart just wants to look like he’s going to church. Mmmmm… Buzz Milk. And Lisa reveals that Bart has a new cute, sexy teacher. Homer volunteers to take Bart to school to see how good looking the teacher is. Even Nelson’s dad showed up with all the other dads to see her. Patty too lol. Mrs. Berrera takes an interest in Bart and offers to tutor him. Bart needs a “firm but pretty hand” that is not Martin Prince. Cue the romantic montage daydream of one Bart Simpson re: his teacher… Wrestlevania, No Reading Railroad, Moon River, and romantically drinking the blood of their defeated enemies.  Skinner shows up in their session to offer to help pull her maps. Bart is none too happy that they both love her.

– Lisa has pimples and is becoming a squeaky voiced teen. Bart is starting to grow a stache and needs to buy a van. Lisa plucks Bart’s stache and Ned’s stache senses get a tingle. “Somewhere another mustache is in tremendous pain.” What the heck… precocious puberty.  Homer has to teach Bart to shave. He’s been shaving with the safety guard on and finds he has a cleft chin when he uses the actual razor. “Hello Billy Zane.” Meanwhile Lisa wants to hide her face with the hood of a sweater. Marge fixes it all up with make-up though.

– At school, Bart sees Skinner flirting with the teacher.  Skinner has PTSD and Parent-Teacher-Student Dilemmas. Bart fakes an injury to have Berrera kiss it but only Willie can kiss boy ow-ees.  Meanwhile Lisa’s make-up is a hit on the playground. Bart’s tutoring is making his attraction grow stronger (sexy tectonic plate rubbing and giving) and even though Skinner tries to say Bart doesn’t need tutoring based on the one child left behind law, Miss Berrera doesn’t want to give up on the boy with a mustache who won’t be a child much longer.

– Lisa is now popular. She got invited to her first 3rd grade party. Bart’s mustache is growing in very well. Marge realizes the milk is made by a soda company. No wonder Maggie is starting to look like Gerald. Homer calls the milk help hotline but it goes straight to Snake in jail.

– Bart witnesses Mrs. Berrera making out with Skinner in the hallway and Milhouse has turned a big corner.  Bart is called to Skinner’s office where he gloats over winning Berrera… errr, Carol. Her favorite salad item is little shredded cheese and she’s never seen an episode of friends and has a cat with two different colored eyes named Bowie (RIP Starchild!)  Regarding shampooing mustaches, Raphael gives Bart this advice.  “It’s a MUST-stache not a when you feel like it stache.” Bart pranks Skinner by placing class pets in his candy.

– Marge is helping Lisa with her makeup so she can go to the party. Lisa has quickly become an expert. Unfortunately, it’s going to rain which will wash off her make-up revealing her pimples… “a social mess in a lamp shade dress.” She chooses to reveal herself rather than face the shameful reveal but her skin is unblemished underneath. The bad milk wears off. Admitting she wasn’t cool though isn’t cool and on her way home, Lisa runs into Ralph. “You look Balonely.” Lisa is now friends with Ralph but after he says fish say moo and admits to bathing in the sink, it’s back to eating crayons for one. Meanwhile, Bart is still planning to win over Skinner. Lisa warns him he’s been “operating under the influence of hormones.”  Even wieners deserve happiness.

– Skinner takes Berrera skating but he doesn’t know how. Bart shows up to let Skinner win his first war. Leave it to his mother to ruin it for him and then skate off like a pro. Bart offers to roast marshmallows with his favorite weiner and Bart’s permanent record works like a charm for the fire since it’s so thick. Mrs. Barrera left Skinner to go back and serve in Afghanistan. “Noone drives them away like you Seymour.”

– All is well in the Simpson house but no more makeup for Lisa.  Bart points out she might have to when she plays Carnegie Hall which is something you shouldn’t say leading to sibling wrestling. Thankfully Maggie is still drinking the Buzz Milk and stops the feud by banging them together.

And that’s that friendereenos.  All in all, I enjoyed this episode.  Not in the pantheon of best ever but still enjoyable.  Someone pointed out they hated the name of it but I laugh at the TMNT joke.  I’m wondering if a continuing gag now is going to be different teachers at Springfield Elementary? Could be fun and I dug Sofia Vergara’s character.  May also have something to do with being a former Air Force sergeant though.  What did you think of the episode?  Like Bart’s stache? Wonder what Buzz “Milk” tastes like?  Sound off in the comments.

TTFN… Wookiee out!