Foodie Fight Premium Dialogue: Tyler Boom

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

Who’s hungry?!  In the mood for a Sweet and Sour Lasagna Burrito from General Chang’s?! Well, this is the mini-event for you!  Yes, it’s mini-event time in our pocket-sized towns, as Foodie Fight makes its way to our games.

This mini-event ushered in one new premium character to help navigate this event.  Tyler Boom is an all-new premium character for Springfield, who will not only help earn event currency but also comes with a short questline.

So let’s take a look at the questline for Tyler, here’s the full dialogue for Like Fodder Like Son…

More details on Tyler Boom can be found here

Like Fodder Like Son Pt. 1
Tyler starts

Homer: “School Poetry Night”. Do we have to?
Marge: Come on, if we survived “The Winter Pinter Playathon”, we can survive this.
Homer: I guess poems ARE way shorter than plays. But if there are any epic poems, I’m out!
Marge: I know this isn’t very Marge of me, but I brought a little something to “help”. *takes vodka out of beehive*
Homer: Marge Simpson, you beautiful blue-haired boozehound. I, too, brought a little something. *takes out plastic bag of liquor*
Marge: Ooh, a Ziploc of — wait, what’s in there?
Homer: Everything from our liquor cabinet.
Marge: Even that ’03 Miller High Life you were saving? Wow.
Milhouse: “In the shallow end of the swimming pool / My floaties gently hold each arm and leg / But the SPF 100 is not waterproof / And so I burn, and so I burn…”
Homer: Poems are supposed to rhyme, idiot!
Marge: You’re so bad, Homie.
Homer: You’re so bad.
Marge: No, you’re so bad!
Homer: They’re just jealous of our alcohol-induced passion.
Skinner: Now it’s time for the 8th grade class.
Marge: The puberty gods are never kind to the 8th graders…
Homer: Yeah, but now at least you can tell which ones are heading in a bad direction.
Marge: Is that Scotty Boom’s kid up there?
Tyler Boom: My poem is called: “My Dad Spends Time With Me Now”.
Scotty Boom: Woo-hoo! Go Son!
Tyler Boom: My Dad spends time with me now. / I miss being a rich kid. / That is my poem. / The end.
Homer: At least that one was short.
Make Tyler Boom Read Another Sad Poem- 8hrs
Make Scotty Boom Film The Poem With His Phone- 8hrs
Homer: What?! Now it’s fourth graders again? When is this poem fest going to end? Also, how many grades are in this school?
Marge: Pass me the fun sauce.
Sherri and Terri: Roses are red / Violets are dead / I am a twin / She is also my twin.
Marge: Those two creep me out. A lot.
Homer: They wouldn’t last a minute in burning-witch times.
Marge: The Scarlet Witch…is she a witch or a superhero? Or…a super witch?!
Scotty Boom: Will you two quiet down! My son is about to go up again and read another poem!
Homer: Oh look, it’s Chef Boy-I’m-Lame!
Scotty Boom: Really? We’re at a school event.
Tyler Boom: My second poem is titled “Why Can’t My Dad Just Be A Celebrity Chef Again?”  “Being a kid is hard / Having a Dad that’s rich is cool / I’d get a job but that is also hard / I’d rather just sit around all day / And—
Scotty Boom: Enough! That’s it with your terrible and super-entitled sounding poems! You are getting off your butt and getting a job.
Tyler Boom: Fine, I’ll get a job. What did you have in mind? CEO of the Chew Network?
Scotty Boom: Tyler, CEO isn’t a starter job. You’re gonna start at the bottom and work your way up, just like your old man did.
Tyler Boom: I guess. How many K will I be making a month, and will that be in Bitcoin or Ethereum?
Scotty Boom: What’s this school teaching you?
Skinner: Iambic pentameter, metaphor, syntax…and that’s just tonight.

Like Fodder Like Son Pt. 2
Tyler starts

Scotty Boom: Tyler, this is the Chew Network kitchen where all the cooking is done for our various shows. Allow me to introduce you to my acting sous chef. I want you to do whatever he says.
Squeaky Voice Teen: It’s a pleasure to meet you, uh, Tyler, sir.
Scotty Boom: Whoa, whoa. No “sirs” necessary. Tyler here is just your average worker. I don’t want you to give him any special treatment just because he’s my son, you hear?
Tyler Boom: Wow, you’re a sous chef? You’re almost the same age as me. How’d you do it?
Squeaky Voice Teen: Well, I’m only “acting” sous chef. My title and salary are actually dishwasher-level until they find someone else. But since you’re here, I do need someone to wash the dishes while I sort out a problem with our deliveries.
Tyler Boom: Ugh. Wash dishes? Can’t you just use the dishwasher?
Squeaky Voice Teen: You are the dishwasher. So let’s scrub those dishes really hard, okay?
Tyler Boom: Fine.
Make Tyler Boom Wash Dishes- 4hrs
Tyler Boom: Well, it took all day, but I finally got the last of these dishes done. You know, it feels good to do some real work. I think I can see why my dad does this so much.
Squeaky Voice Teen: You didn’t do anything! You just hired three TaskRabbits to wash all the dishes for you!
Kirk: And it was surge pricing! Yeah!
Tyler Boom: Well, the dishes are clean, aren’t they?

Like Fodder Like Son Pt. 3
Tyler starts

Scotty Boom: So, how’s my boy doing?
Squeaky Voice Teen: Terrible. He keeps hiring people to do all the work for him.
Scotty Boom: Really? That’s a shame. I guess he just isn’t cut out for this job.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Yeah. I think you’re right, sir.
Scotty Boom: That’s why I’m promoting him to line cook!
Tyler Boom: Well, it’s about time. I’ve been at this entry-level position for almost half a day!
Make Tyler Boom Get Promoted to Line Cook- 4hrs
Make Squeaky Voice Teen Realize Life Isn’t Fair- 4hrs
Tyler Boom: So are you still my boss, or am I your boss now? I don’t actually know what sous chef means.
Squeaky Voice Teen: I don’t either, but since it has a French word in it, I’m still in charge. And now that you’re a line cook, I’m going to treat you like one. I need you to dice a hundred onions before lunch.
Tyler Boom: A hundred onions?! That’s gonna take forever. Plus, my eyes are really sensitive. Eh, I’ll just put ’em in this blender instead. *turns on blender*
Squeaky Voice Teen: I said dice the onions. We can’t use them if they’re blended!
Scotty Boom: Hey guys, just checking in. How’s everything going? Whoa, did Tyler just make this onion paste all by himself?
Squeaky Voice Teen: Well, technically yes, but…
Scotty Boom: Like father like son. Whose house? Boom’s house! Tyler, I’m promoting you to sous chef.
Squeaky Voice Teen: But…I’m the sous chef!
Scotty Boom: You were acting sous chef. And what an actor you’ve been. So good in fact that I’m demoting you to line cook.
Squeaky Voice Teen: What?! That’s so unfair. Your kid can’t even dice an onion!
Tyler Boom: Don’t worry. As your boss, I’ll promote you one day. Also, I need those dishes in the sink washed. Now!

Like Fodder Like Son Pt. 4
Tyler starts

Scotty Boom: Congratulations on your promotion, son. Are you ready to make your old man even prouder?
Tyler Boom: You bet! Ever since yesterday, when I started out as a dishwasher, I’ve been working so hard towards this goal.
Scotty Boom: Glad to hear it, because we’re featuring your menu tonight!
Tyler Boom: You can count on me, Dad. Alright, everything I’ve learned throughout my entire cooking career will be under the spotlight and put to the test… All eight hours of it!
Make Tyler Boom Cook on a Hibachi- 4hrs
Make Scotty Boom Beam With Undeserved Pride for Tyler- 4hrs
Scotty Boom: I hope you all are having a lovely evening. So tell me, how is your experience so far at our fine establishment?
Kent Brockman: This just in, Scotty Boom’s new restaurant is a flop.
CBG: Worst. Meal. Ever.
Wolfcastle: My onions were mushy. I don’t like mushy onions.
Scotty Boom: Really? I’m so sorry. If you don’t mind, let me take a look at those onions… My God, you’re right! And I know exactly who to blame! Tyler, I made a grave mistake when I demoted our sous chef to line cook.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Finally, some logic in this kitchen!
Scotty Boom: I can’t believe he used a blender to dice onions!
Squeaky Voice Teen: What?! I didn’t blend them. Tyler did!
Scotty Boom: And now you can’t even own up to your own mistake. That’s it, you’re demoted to dishwasher.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Dishwasher?! But—
Scotty Boom: ACTING dishwasher.

Like Fodder Like Son Pt. 5
Tyler starts

Squeaky Voice Teen: Mr. Boom, I don’t mean to complain, but since I can’t get demoted any lower, we need to talk about your son. Everything at the restaurant has gone downhill since he started.
Scotty Boom: Hmm, well I suppose you have a point.
Squeaky Voice Teen: It’s time for you to choose, sir. It’s either him or me.
Scotty Boom: You’re one of my best employees. In fact, I think you’re my only employee. Where is everyone else?
Squeaky Voice Teen: Tyler fired them all for “looking at him funny”.
Scotty Boom: *sigh* I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this, but I think you’re right. It’s time to make the tough call.
Squeaky Voice Teen: Thank you, Mr. Boom. I know this won’t be easy, but you’re making the right decision.
 Make Scotty Boom Promote Tyler to Executive Chef- 4hrs
Make Tyler Boom Get Promoted to Executive Chef- 4hrs
Squeaky Voice Teen: You’re promoting your son to Executive Chef? That’s it, I’m outta here.
Tyler Boom: Thanks, Dad! Wow, “Executive Chef”, I still can’t believe it!
Scotty Boom: No thanks necessary, son. You’ve earned this.
Tyler Boom: Yeah, I really did, didn’t I?

And that’s it my friends, the Foodie Fight premium dialogue.

Thoughts on the event?  Did you buy Tyler? Thoughts on the dialogue? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!

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