Into the Simpsonsverse Act 4 Full Dialogue: Armpit of the Universe

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

As we wind down the final hours of the Into the Simpsonsverse event (ends tomorrow!), it’s time to wrap this event up with a pretty little bow…in the form of the hilarious dialogue!

So here’s a look at the full dialogue for Armput of the Universe…just in case you missed it by tapping too fast…

Armpit of the Universe Pt. 1
Auto starts

Evil Godmother Burns: Hmm, it appears you’ve finally found yourselves a formidable warrior, heroes.
Anime Marge: Get out of my way.
Evil Godmother Burns: You have won the battle, Homers, but I promise you will lose the war! *disappears*
Noir Homer: Looks like this dame joined us in the nick of time.
Anime Marge: Call me dame again. I dare you…
Princess Homer: Never mind him. But we do need your help to stop the godmother. So, will you join us?
Anime Marge: I have no time for such idle matters… I have my own quest to fulfill. I bid you all good fortune on your journeys. *disappears*
Homer: Wow, she kicks butt and plays hard to get. So hot.
Noir Homer: Dangit. The godmother got away again. We have to track her down.
Princess Homer: Um, I think we have bigger problems right now. It looks like the portal has become unstable.
Homer: Gee, I wonder why.
Noir Homer: No need to point fingers.
Homer: I’m only pointing at your fingers because they were the ones on the axe.
Anime Homer: Something come through portal!
Make Homer Cower Behind Princess Homer-4hrs
Make Noir Homer Draw His Gun- 4hrs
Make Princess Homer Draw Her Wand- 4hrs
Make Anime Homer Draw Calligraphy- 4hrs
Collect Gravitons-
x115. 4hrs
Princess Homer: Is that some type of carriage?
Homer: No, it’s even better. It’s a battle van! This must be from the apocalypse universe! This portal is the best!
Noir Homer: You mean the portal that’s trapped everyone here against their free will?
Homer: The very same.
Noir Homer: Right. Well, in any case, these wheels oughta come in handy. C’mon let’s go chase down the godmother.

Armpit of the Universe Pt. 2
Auto starts

Princess Homer: Hmm, this battle van handles much better than my pumpkin carriage.
Homer: Probably because it doesn’t have shocks made of celery. At least I don’t think it does.
Noir Homer: Watch it, toots! There’s some goofballs copping a squat in the street!
Princess Homer: Gracious me! They’re as pale as leprechuans after Saint Patrick’s Day!
Ethereal Beings: Oh, pardon us, earthlings. We were simply having lunch.
Homer: Your lunch is an old banana peel in the middle of the road?
Ethereal Beings: Mmm…the heat of the asphalt gives them the perfect texture.
Noir Homer: Ooookay. So these guys eat garbage? This multi-verse is getting crazier by the second.
Cletus: I agree. You really gots ta deep fry nanner peels ‘fore eatin’ ‘em.
Make Ethereal Beings Eat Garbage-4hrs
Make Homer Ask if They’re Blarg Aliens-4hrs
Make Noir Homer Be Grossed Out- 4hrs
Make Princess Homer Look Away- 4hrs
Make Anime Homer Say They Bring Shame to Forefathers-4hrs
Collect Gravitons-
x155. 4hrs.
Ethereal Beings: So the dimensional portal has become unstable, you say?
Noir Homer: It seems so. It’s spitting out the craziest stuff. No offense.
Ethereal Beings: None taken. You know, a dimensional portal can be re-stabilized with a space-time continuum.
Noir Homer: You mean…THE space-time continuum, don’t you? Because there’s only one, right? About yea big by yea wide, extending in all directions, wanted for questioning in connection with the Big Bang?
Ethereal Beings: Oh, no. There are many space-time continuums. At least one in every dimension. But one thing is consistent…they always reside at the nexus of the universe.
Homer: The nexus of the universe? Where’s that?
Ethereal Beings: Always in the same place in every dimension. The NewTube Headquarters.
Anime Homer: Best place for watch anime!
Noir Homer: What’s NewTube?
Ethereal Beings: It’s a…streaming video web platform.
Noir Homer: Oh, okay. And what’s streaming? And video? And web platform? Eh, who cares. Gimme a whisky.

Armpit of the Universe Pt. 3
Auto starts

Princess Homer: But what about the evil godmother? If we waste time stabilizing the portal then we won’t have time to stop her from taking over Springfield!
Noir Homer: If we don’t stabilize the portal, there may not be a Springfield left to take over.
Homer: Guys, I have an idea. We hit two birds with one stone.
Noir Homer: I like the sound of that. What did you have in mind?
Homer: We throw the stone just right so it ricochets off one bird and hits another one.
Anime Homer: Evil birds! Good plan.
Noir Homer: Your plan is to kill two actual birds?
Homer: That’s how people always get out of this sort of mess.
Make Homer Throw Stones-4hrs
Make Princess Homer Try to Save the Birds- 4hrs
Make Anime Homer Search for Evil Birds- 4hrs
Make Noir Homer Sigh- 4hrs
Collect Gravitons-
x155. 4hrs.
Noir Homer: Alright, here’s the actual plan… We use the battle van to mow our way through the city, ignoring all traffic lights and stop signs, to make it to the NewTube building in record time.
Anime Homer: Kill so many evil bird!
Noir Homer: We steal the space-time continuum, stabilize the portal, and then—
Princess Homer: Then we sing a beautiful song about friendship and victory!
Noir Homer: Uh, no. We still have to take care of the evil godmother.
Homer: Is she a bird?
Noir Homer: That’s not gonna work again. Actually, it didn’t work the first time either.
Homer: Agree to disagree.
Noir Homer: Everybody just get in the van!

Armpit of the Universe Pt. 4
Auto starts

Noir Homer: Alright, we’re here. Everybody ready?
Anime Homer: Ready!
Princess Homer: Ready!
Homer: Ready!
Noir Homer: Homer, where did you get a motorcycle helmet?
Homer: Nabbed it off one of the guys we ran over on the way here.
Noir Homer: Fair enough. *kicks in door*
Evil Godmother Burns: *gasp*
Anime Homer: *gasp* Second bird!
Evil Godmother Burns: Blast it all. How did you know I’d be here?
Noir Homer: We didn’t. But we should have suspected. Of course you’d want the space-time continuum for yourself so you could stabilize the portal and bring your army through.
Evil Godmother Burns: What are you talking about? I’m here sending videos to NewTube headquarters in other dimensions to recruit my evil doppelgangers from the multi-verse.
Noir Homer: Oh… OH…
Homer: *whispers* Phew, that was a close one, guys. I totally thought she’d figured out our plan to stabilize the portal with the space-time continuum.
Noir Homer:
Evil Godmother Burns:
Noir Homer: Quick! Get the space-time continuum before she does!
Make Homer Trip Over Noir Homer- 4hrs
Make Noir Homer Trip Over Princess Homer- 4hrs
Make Princess Homer Trip Over Anime Homer- 4hrs
Make Anime Homer Stop and Eat a Sandwich- 4hrs
Make Evil Godmother Burns Acquire the Continuum- 4hrs
Collect Gravitons-
x115. 4hrs.

Armpit of the Universe Pt. 5
Auto starts

Evil Godmother Burns: Haha! You oafs are no match for me. Any last words before I stabilize the portal and bring my army through?
Princess Homer: I do wish you’d reconsider, Evil Godmother! Destroying the multi-verse is very not nice!
Homer: Kinda lame last words.
Noir Homer: Guys, this is our final chance. Anyone have any last-minute ideas?
Homer: Well, I was thinking—
Noir Homer: Ideas that don’t involve birds.
Homer: No.
Anime Homer: We are to do what being born was for to us!
Noir Homer: Come again?
Princess Homer: I think he means “we have to do what we were born to do”.
Homer: Oh… Like each one of us do the thing that we’ve been building up to the entire event so we can complete our character arcs and have a satisfying culmination?
Make Princess Homer Sing a Song-4hrs
Make Anime Homer Confuse Everyone With Poor Translations- 4hrs
Make Noir Homer Shoot the Continuum- 4hrs
Make Homer Look for Something to Competitively Eat- 4hrs
Collect Gravitons-
x195. 4hrs.
Evil Godmother Burns: Wow, all that struggle and no one actually tried to stop me. You all really do make awful heroes. Ah hah, and here’s the power button! Now, time to transfer the continuum’s power to the portal and keep this turned on forever! *presses button* What the? Why is the portal powering down?
Noir Homer: Hah! Wouldja look at that?! The one time you actually try to give this thing more juice and it up and breaks down. That’s American craftsmanship for ya.
Princess Homer: Wait, you mean we’re all stuck here now?
Anime Homer: What about townhome?
Homer: What about Lard Lad Donuts?!
Noir Homer: Homer, we’re still in your universe.
Homer: Oh, thank goodness.
Noir Homer: I’m afraid it looks like your version of Springfield is now our home, and it’s the worst Springfield in all of the multi-verses! But at least we stopped anyone else from getting sucked into this travesty of a town.
Princess Homer: Do any of me care that the evil godmother is getting away?
Noir Homer: Eh, the portal is finally out of commission, she can’t do much harm now. Save it for the sequel.

Not Half Bad
Auto starts

Wiggum: Hmm, so this lady tried to take over the universe you say?
Lisa: The entire multi-verse!
Wiggum: Oh, wow. Is — is that bigger?
Lisa: Uh….maybe? I mean, they’re both infinite, but I think one is more infinite?
Evil Godmother Burns: And I would’ve gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for you meddling adults.
Lisa: If by “adults” you mean the four versions of my dad, then you’re using that word a bit loosely. I’m pretty sure they DID let you get away with it. But not me.
Evil Godmother Burns: In my defense, while I was at the NewTube headquarters, I had some time to look up the history of this universe and…I’m WAY less evil than most of the people here.
Wiggum: Pretty sound argument. I think we’re done here.
Lisa: We are not! Cuff her, Chief.
Wiggum: Yes, ma’am!

And that’s it my friends, the full dialogue for Act 4 of Into the Simpsonsverse..and it wraps up the entire storyline for this event!

Thoughts on Act 4? Dialogue? Thoughts on how the story played out? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!

Leave a Reply