In our silly lil game, we sometimes see things pop in that we have no clue as to their Origin. They seem familiar, but we just can’t pinpoint from where. So that is why we decided to make a fun lil reminder out of it. To let you know just Where Did THAT Come From?
Bowling! One of the things in the Best. Show. Ever. that we’ve always needed more of and now there’s been an entire mini-event all about it. The 2017 Pin Pals mini event has had all sorts of items about throwing balls into gutters and wondering if one-armed bowlers are lefties or righties. Strike that… dumb question. If you’re in Springfield, lefty is always a good guess.
Anyhoo… hooray for new ideas in TSTO! As usual, when new additions arrive in the game, there’s always an inevitable tapping on my attic floor from Alissa to get started on writing about the origins for it all. It’s always a pleasure to re-watch episodes of the Best. Show. Ever. to do just that after I blow the Cheetos dust of my furry fingers so I don’t gum up my key board. Fun fact: said dust is not a good substitute for talcum when bowling. For this round of origins, we’ll be taking a look at the Jacques and Fiesta Terrace, a premium combo available for 150 donuts.
“Life on the Fast Lane” (S1:E9)
We’re headed way back to the classics of The Simpsons here friends. Back to the bygone days where a young Wookiee had no responsibilities other than finding a way to secretly watch the cartoon which was corrupting America’s youth and making fuzzballs tell people to not have cows, man. In this amazing episode, we arrive to this bowling-centric round of hilariousness by way of one Homer Simpson thinking it’d be slick to buy his beautiful wife a bowling ball with his name on it for Marge’s birthday. In his defense, he sorta forgot and he IS Homer. At least the kids made pancakes. During Marge’s birthday dinner at the Singing Sirloin, Homer literally drops the ball at Marge’s 34th birthday party. Holy heck… I’m three years older than Marge!
A bowling ball has to be better than Homer’s previous gifts of a tackle box or Connie Chung calendar, right? Unsurprisingly, Marge is pretty ticked since she’s never bowled in her life and the finger holes were drilled for her husband’s fingers. What I love is that Marge turns the selfish gift on its ear and decides to use the bowling ball for herself. Bring on Marge at the very first appearance of Barney’s Bowlarama.
Marge gets a lane and her 13AA shoes (well… a “warm and moist” 9 and 15) and is off to become a bowler. Her lane just happens to be right next to Jacques who immediately takes a shine to her.
Jacques and his French accent (gotta love Albert Brooks) is pleased to meet Homer (Marge doesn’t admit to the ball being named after her husband) and an awkward and flirtatious round of bowling lessons begins for Marjorie and Jacques. I guess it’s semi-professional since he charges her twenty five dollars. Her new teacher is all slick charisma and even offers to let her bowl with his ball. Thankfully Marge opts to use her Homer ball. As Jacques says… people often have “senseless attachments to heavy clumsy things.”
Marge enjoys the lessons and time with Jacques too. She goes back the very next night. Uh oh… the French fop even bought her her very own bowling glove with Marge stitched onto it. I distinctly remember not being okay with the seductive bowling lessons with Jacques as a wee fuzzball. The slimo even drives her homer, errr home, after their second lesson. Gotta admit that watching Jacques flirt with Marge still makes me uncomfortable. I do give credit to the writers for writing such a complicated and risqué episode for a family sitcom in the very first season though. Marge protests as a married woman but Jacques’ feels different. “My mind says stop but my heart and my hips cry proceed.” I’ve been there before and Marge is one beautiful lady. So much tension. Jacques invites Marge to brunch the next day to pick up the two pins left of the ten pins currently knocked over in his heart. It’s up to Marge’s morals to decide whether to aim for the spare in a marriage that might be failing all because of a bowling ball.
Marge does go to brunch the next day at Shorty’s. Uh oh. Can’t be good that she gave Bart and Lisa gigantic lunches chock full of goodies to overcompensate for her guilt either. Helen Lovejoy (in her first appearance too) runs across the two there which compounds the guilt of Mrs. Homer Simpson. Jacques tries to masquerade the brunch date by faking a bowling lesson. It gets serious though when Jacques asks Marge to meet with him that night at a location other than the bowling alley away from prying eyes… his apartment. Marge’s response after fainting and fantasizing about Jacques? “Is Thursday ok?”
Crap on a stick. I feel like Homer when he discovers Marge’s monogrammed bowling glove. This is not okay and I’m feeling depressed. And where does that potential homewrecker Jacques live? Fiesta Terrace. For single living.
Jacques is all ready to seduce his student. He’s ready “to strike out tonight” and enjoy his moment of anticipation. Marge is on her way and passing all sorts of reminders about the bonds of holy matrimony. Now to decide if it’s the thrill of new French romance she wants or the husband who just loves the perfect way she makes PB & Js.
While I don’t know that the scene makes up for all the awkwardness of the episode. I really love the little tribute to An Officer and a Gentleman that ends the episode. Even better is Homer double checking that she went to the plant to see him. Hooray for Marge being the wonderful woman we’ve all come to know and love!
And that’s it for Jacques. He shows up in the background of occasional scenes in the future but never as a main player. My favorite is on a bowling team that describes what he almost did to the Simpson family in “Team Homer” (S7:E12). Jacques is also seen at the bowling alley with Lurleen Lumpkin in “Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder” (S11:E6).
I also like him dancing with Carl in the “Do the Bartman” music video or him showing up in the angry mob scene of The Simpsons Movie.
Fiesta Terrace appears again in “Lisa’s Pony” (S3:E8). Sure this episode is all about a big dumb animal that Lisa loves more than her pony named Princess but it is worth mentioning that Apu lives there and is dating Princess Kashmir. Also interesting that the big dumb animal was not a hippopotamus even though that animal’s name translates to river horse from the original ancient Greek.
So there you go… Jacques and Fiesta Terrace. Did you remember the episodes? Splurge your donuts on the seductive Frenchman? Got a random appearance you love that I didn’t bother mentioning? Happy Marge got her groove back with the right man? Sound off in the comments and happy classy tapping friends.
TTFN… Wookiee out!