Springfield Enlightened Premium Dialogue: Advisor Frink

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

Are you ready to reach true enlightenment?  Feel an inner peace you may have been missing in your life?  Inner peace might be nice after the Robots tried to destroy Springfield… Get ready as Siddmartha comes to Springfield to bring us all a little calmness in the latest event to hit our pocket-sized towns…Springfield Enlightened!

Act 1 of this Enlightened event has ushered in one new premium character to help navigate our way to true enlightenment.  Advisor Frink is an all-new premium character for Springfield, who will not only help earn event currency but also comes with a short questline.

So let’s take a look at the questline for Siddmartha’s advisor, here’s the full dialogue for Written in the Stars…

More details on Advisor Frink can be found here

Written in the Stars Pt. 1
Advisor Frink starts

Advisor Frink: Egads, the directional orientation of this town makes literally no sense! Well, not literally. I really need to stop saying that to emphasize a point. I know! I can get my bearings by literally observing the stars! Ah noiven, I did it again. No, I didn’t. I CAN observe the stars. Literally!
Make Advisor Frink Observe the Stars- 4hrs
Frink: Ready for a jam-packed evening of astronomy. I’ve got my telescope, my journal, my space pen, my astronaut diapers…
Advisor Frink: *carrying a telescope* Excuse me, pardon, coming through, hoyvin.
Frink: Oh, hello. Always nice to see a fellow astronomer. The view of the night sky up here on Lover’s Lane is the best in town, if you can handle the smacking noises.
Advisor Frink: Agreed. May the beautiful eyes of Cassiopeia shine fortune down upon us tonight. Not that I’ll need it, being one of the greatest astrologers in all the land.
Frink: Did, uh…did you say astrology? Certainly a slip of the tongue, yes? You couldn’t possibly be referring to that junk science.
Advisor Frink: Junk science, you say? Then how do you explain this? *hands him a paper*
Frink: *reading* “My daily horoscope: Someone will test your resolve today”.
Advisor Frink: I rest my case.

Written in the Stars Pt. 2
Advisor Frink starts

Frink: Astrology is just a load of hoyvin. Stars are meant to study the universe, not to divine information about human affairs.
Advisor Frink: Then how can you explain my ability to see the future?
Frink: Pfft, if that were true then you could guess what I’m about to do next.
Advisor Frink: Laugh?
Frink: Ha!… I mean, no, I was going to continue mocking you.
Advisor Frink: I’ll do it again. In a moment, a man will approach us and ask for food.
Frink: Uh huh. Well, where is he? I don’t see any—
Homer: Did either of you see where that ice cream truck went?
Frink: Gah…lucky guess! But still, how did you do that?
Advisor Frink: I told you, through the science of astrology. And certainly not because I observed this man dropping his ice cream through my telescope.
Make Advisor Frink Gloat- 4hrs
Make Professor Frink be Intrigued- 4hrs
Make Homer Chase an Ice Cream Truck- 4hrs

Written in the Stars Pt. 3
Advisor Frink starts

Frink: I’m intrigued. What else can your “science” do?
Advisor Frink: Please don’t air quote my science.
Frink: Apology.
Advisor Frink: Accepted. Did you know that through the power of astrology, I can discern a person’s personality type using only their birthday?
Frink: Just their birthday? Well. my birthday is in January, so I must have the same personality as Joan of Arc.
Advisor Frink: I can see you’re skeptical. Typical Capricorn.
Make Advisor Frink Give Horoscope Readings– 1hr
Make Professor Frink Wonder How He Guessed His Birthday- 1hr
Frink: I’m very familiar with the concept of horoscopes. But I can assure you, they are a complete fabrication.
Advisor Frink: Then how could I ascertain that you’re single?
Frink: Ah ha! I’m NOT single. I have a beautiful wife and an octoparrot. You see? Junk science!
Mrs Frink: John, our marriage isn’t working. I think we should see other scientists.
Frink: *gasp*
Advisor Frink: You were saying?

Written in the Stars Pt. 4
Advisor Frink starts

Frink: I must admit, this showdown is not going how I imagined. Is it possible that astrology isn’t all magic and fairytales?
Advisor Frink: Magic’s just science we don’t understand yet.
Frink: Indeed. A very astute observation. Made by Arthur C. Clark.
Advisor Frink: *turns off phone* I knew you were going to say that.
Make Advisor Frink Predict the Future– 4hrs
Make Professor Frink Look for Flaws- 4hrs
Advisor Frink: For my final act, I predict that a local bank is about to be robbed.
Frink: Even though that is a daily occurrence here in Springfield, timing something to the minute would indeed suffice as proof of your scientific capabilities.
Snake: *running* Yo, you got a place where a dude could crash for a bit? I can totally pay you handsomely.
Wiggum: Stop that man, he just robbed a bank! Seriously, I walked a whole block to get over here, there’s no way I can do another.

Written in the Stars Pt. 5
Advisor Frink starts

Frink: Astrology has been a source of real science this entire time?! And to think of all the years I wasted on astronomy, with the data and the hypothesises… hypotheseses…with the more than one hypothesis.
Advisor Frink: I think someone owes someone an apology.
Frink: Indeed. I admit I was wrong to doubt the ways of astrology, and I hereby declare it to be a real scie—
Wiggum: *over police radio* Calling all officers, officer needs assistance. I’m at the Krusty Burger on Evergreen Terrace and forgot my wallet. Need cash assistance immediately.
Advisor Frink: *turns off police radio* Sorry about that. Now, you were saying?
Frink: Is that a police radio in your pocket?!
Advisor Frink: What?! No, I’m just…happy to see you.
Frink: So, this whole thing was smoke and mirrors? I knew it!
Advisor Frink: Look, I can appreciate your skepticism right now, but if you’d just turn around and look at the constellation behind you, it will explain everything.
Make Professor Frink Turn Around– 4hrs
Make Advisor Frink Run For It- 4hrs

And that’s it my friends, the full story behind Advisor Frink!

Thoughts on the event so far?  Did you buy Advisor Frink? Thoughts on the dialogue? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!