Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!
Springfield is overrun with escaped convicts! Can Wolf the Bounty Hunter help save the day? Only time…and donuts…will tell!
This mini-event ushered in one new premium character to help navigate this event. Wolf the Bounty Hunter is an all-new premium character for Springfield, who will not only help earn event currency but also comes with a short questline.
So let’s take a look at the questline for Wolf, here’s the full dialogue for Snake Charmer…
Snake Charmer Pt. 1
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Snake, for a bad guy you’re not such a bad guy. I’ve captured and brought you back to jail so many times, I started putting it in my iCal.
Snake: Well as one of my mom’s boyfriends always said, if you’re not gonna steal every day, you may as well not steal at all.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: But how do you always manage to escape from jail so quickly?
Snake: I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you…which would probably land me back in jail. Pretty ironic, huh.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Yup. Life’s funny that way. At least that’s what it says on the dagger tattoo on my bicep.
Snake: Speaking of biceps, how do you stay so ripped?
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: The key is working out whenever you have a few minutes. So, I just work out with whatever is at hand.
Make Wolf Work Out With Criminals- 4hrs
Make Snake Be Impressed- 4hrs
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Well, here we are back at the police station.
Snake: Honey, we’re home.
Wiggum: Well, if it isn’t the prodigal son and his bounty hunter.
Snake: Sorry, did the prodigal son have a bounty hunter?
Lou: Yeah, I’m not sure that parable really works here, Chief.
Wiggum: Alright, alright. Just book him.
Lou: If you had said Jean Valjean and Inspector Javert, or Al Capone and Eliot Ness, I think we’d all get on board.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: That makes way more sense.
Snake Charmer Pt. 2
Snake: So, we meet again!
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Other than death and taxes, your dedication to crime is one of the only things left a man can truly count on in this crazy, mixed up world.
Snake: I hear you. That’s why I took up golf. It’s like the one thing besides crime that helps me drown out all the noise.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Golf, huh? I didn’t take you for the country club type.
Snake: Oh, I love country clubs. I hit the links and then I hit all the members.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Two birds, one stone.
Snake: Exactly. Hey, why don’t we play a round before you turn me in?
Make Wolf “Play Golf”- 4hrs
Make Snake “Play Golf”- 4hrs
Snake: You know, I may have a way for you to drum up more business that could be mutually beneficial.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: I don’t want to hear it.
Snake: It would mean having more bounties than a self-employed, tooth-necklaced bail enforcement agent could ever fathom.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: I’m listening…
Snake Charmer Pt. 3
Wiggum: Wolf, we need to have a talk about one of our prisoners.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Oh yeah? Which one, Chief?
Wiggum: Jake Snailbird.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: You mean…Snake Jailbird?
Wiggum: *looks at clipboard* Sure. We were auditing our records and it seems he’s escaped ninety-seven times in the last six months.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Whoa, that’s a lot of escapes.
Wiggum: And you’ve caught him and collected the bounty every time.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Well, I’m very good at my job.
Wiggum: What’s funny is Snake always escapes prison the very same day you visit your mother there.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Well, I definitely didn’t bring him cakes with files in them, if that’s where this is going.
Wiggum: Indeed, that is where this was going. But good to know you didn’t do that. Someone get Robert Stack on the phone ’cause this is one unsolved mystery.
Make Wolf Breathe a Sigh of Relief- 4hrs
Make Wiggum Remain Oblivious- 4hrs
Snake: Man, that was close. Good thing that dude is about as sharp as a golf ball.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: I’m starting to feel the heat, Snake. I don’t think we can do this anymore.
Snake: *sigh* I suppose even Wiggum is bound to catch on eventually.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: One more round of golf for old times’ sake?
Snake Charmer Pt. 4
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Well, it looks like we’re back to meeting up every few months. And by meeting up, I mean arresting you.
Snake: It was fun while it lasted. What are you gonna do without all the extra bounties?
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: No clue. Probably take a job as a cooler in the rowdiest bar this side of the Mason-Dixon Line, busting heads and waging war against a corrupt local businessman.
Snake: That sounds awfully similar to the plot of the movie Road House.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Never seen it.
Snake: Hmm…what if there was a way to put a lot more criminals on the street…wait for it, and you could catch them?
Make Wolf Make a Plan- 4hrs
Make Snake Interrupt Wolf’s Explanation- 4hrs
Snake: …and then after I break out, I send an email to the rest of C Block telling them how to escape. You’ll be up to your mullet in sweet sweet bounties.
Wolf The Bounty Hunter: Not sure, releasing a bunch of violent criminals out into the streets sounds risky.
Snake: If by risky you mean awesome, I concur.
And that’s it my friends, the Breakout Bounty premium dialogue.
Thoughts on the event? Did you buy Wolf? Thoughts on the dialogue? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!