From the Mouths of Addicts: Honey, I’ve Shrunk The Addicts

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

Welcome to another edition of From the Mouths of Addicts, where YOU get to sound off on anything and everything in the world of Tapped Out!  This week’s post comes to us from one of our long time friends and she who runs Futurama Addicts and Family Guy Addicts…Russian Tigger! 

Somehow, between writing loads of posts for FWOT Addicts and FGA Addicts, RT found the time to knock out a fun guest post for TSTO!  (overachiever!)  So check out her hilarious take on becoming part of TSTO. 

Enjoy it my friends!  Here’s Russian Tigger… -Alissa 

Honey, I’ve Shrunk The Addicts

So you’re sitting there just a tap, tap, tapping away, and suddenly you start to think about how much fun it would be to shrink ray yourself and hop right into that miniature Springfield you’ve so lovingly brought to life.

Surely I’m not the only one whose imagined doing this? Oh, I sense silence in the room.  So you’re seriously telling me you’ve never thought about: visiting the little town you’ve built from scratch;  paying a visit to everyone’s favorite dysfunctional family; popping into the pub for a Flaming Moe, and you’ve most definitely never thought about staging a daren’tl protest outside the nuclear plant. Ok I get it, you’ve never, ever, ever thought about wandering those Springfield sidewalks just to see where your little tapping feet take you.

Well, that’s in the past as your thinking about it now aren’t you?  You’re not so tiny minds are transporting you to your little towns, you can see yourselves in there, can’t you? Don’t deny it, I can see a glint in your eyes about the game that’s not been there since 3 Act events were introduced. But let’s not ruin the moment by talking about that.

Instead, let your mind wander a little further and think about the fun that’s to be had should your virtual and your reality collide. Why?  Because I want you to share your innermost Springfield secrets with us.

Picture this, Professor Frink has beamed you into your little Tapped Out town, but what will lilliputian you do? To help us find out I’m granting you three wishes, these will let you choose where you’d live, where you’d work and what you’d do in your spare time, and you’ll have lots of it since you wouldn’t be spending your days and nights tapping anymore.

Now we’ve got the general idea of the way, let’s start with where would you live, tell us where you’d call home, where you’d want to rest your weary little head at night? Would you insist on being given a free land token so you could take your own home with you? Or would you leave all that behind and move to Evergreen Terrace hoping no-one would notice you squatting in Bart’s treehouse? Or maybe you fancy setting yourself up in the Spinster Apartments or Bachelor Arms where you could boast of having Patty,  Selma or Kirk as your neighborino. Or do the mansions of the super-rich in Springfield Heights call to you? After all, you worked hard to be a virtual billionaire, you might as well reap the rewards.

And once your housing situation is sorted,  you got to get yourself a job to pay for it, well unless you’re hanging out in Springfield Heights, in which case you’ll let someone else work to pay for it.  But back to the business at hand of your new virtual career, just what’s calling to you. Would you stick to what you do now or would you like to try something new? How’s about bringing a little health and safety to the nuclear plant, or would you like to replace Smithers and be Mr Burns’ up close and very personal assistant, would you earn your living by becoming a minor celebrity at KBBL Radio, or use your Kwik E Mart farming experience to get a job working for Apu? Or maybe, just maybe, you’d want to do a Wookiee and work in a theme park, after all, Krustyland could be doing with some fresh ideas, maybe you think you could be the one to save it?

And finally, all work and no play is just not allowed on this site, so with your housing sorted, and the bills paid, let’s talk about your free time and the fun animated tasks you could do to pass it. I want you to tell us just what would we be watching you get up to?  Wait, hold it there backup up guys remember the site is PG, so scrub that thought and think of a new one or two pronto, please. To get you thinking about this I’ve come up with a few for our Addict Hosts, Alissa, Safi, Patric & Wookiee. But which of the animated tasks below belongs to which Addict? Can you guess?

Task 1: Ride the Monorail like it’s a roller coaster!
Task 2: Be a bliss ninny about potty training!
Task 3: Statistically analyse the risks of a nuclear meltdown!
Task 4: Get waxed for charity!

Oh and since I’m having so much fun here I’m going to be real generous and allow you one more wish, yes you can have yet another animated task but this time you can share it with another character in the game. Yes I’m going let you hang out on a joint task with your favourite character and what’s more important I’m letting you decide what you get up to, but again remember this is a PG site, so keep any Kirk and his acorns type thoughts to yourself.

Anyway I guess since I started this madness I should be the first to share my thoughts, so here we go.

Well despite being uber allergic to cats I think I’d like to live with the Crazy Cat Lady. Why, because she’s bat poop crazy and I’m presuming having to be tidy wouldn’t be in my rental agreement.

And how would I pay my rent, well probably in cat food, but that’s not what you meant is it? You mean what job would I do? I’d be a donut tester. Why?  Well, it’s a good, honest way to get free donuts.

And when work is finished for the day I’d  indulge in a few hobby-related animated tasks, these would be “Shoot wildlife…..with a camera” and “Play Family Guy: Quest For Stuff whilst no one is looking”.

And who would I want to hang out with, oh that’s easy Goth Lisa, we’d engage in a joint task of “Hanging out at the graveyard”.

So there’s my little slice of virtual reality, I look forward to hearing yours. Oh and apologies in advance to Patric for calling our towns tiny, little, small but it’s a well-known fact us girls don’t mind anything we have being referred to as small, tiny or little unlike……..

Thanks, Russian Tigger for giving us all something to think about, while laughing hysterically!  What are your thoughts on being shrunken down into Springfield?

As always we love hearing from you guys…so if you have an opinion or take on something going on in the game (or something that should be going on in the game), please send it along to us…

52 responses to “From the Mouths of Addicts: Honey, I’ve Shrunk The Addicts

  1. I think we’re going need more cabins in the woods & mountains, as lot folk want to live in them. I’m going up the rent on them immediately in my town.

  2. I’d live in the Mountain Retreat. I’d work at/co own the Samba School. In my down time I’d hang with Lisa & Otto or shake my tush with Princess Kashmir at Florence of Arabia. Every year I would hold ‘Springfield Does Strictly’ at the Community Centre as it is vastly underused……💜X

    • Springfield Does Strictly sounds like a hoot, I’d love hear who you’d pair up 😀😀😀

      • Smithers and Mr. Burns for starters. Agent Bont and Mrs. K. Homer & Mindy 🙊. Marge & Jacques🤣………💜X

        • Howling, just imagining Burns dragging Smithers round the dance floor, wonder if Burns in Blackpool would make a good episode 😀😀😀


  4. This is a really fun post, I’m sure it was as fun to write as it was to read! Thanks Russian Tigger!

    First, I would probably be seek out Ruth Powers to be my bff, or some other strong willed women. Really I think any of the Springfield residents would be fun to hang out with, and Ruth would be handy in a bar fight, if need be! Second, since I just got Mars out of one of the Black Friday boxes, I would work at Mars, which is conveniently located to NARA. I would be happy to dig through the Mars dirt and help build sustainable houses. Unfortunately it’s not too far away from the Power Plant, so if and when Homer destroys the Power Plant, the toxicity would ruin the Mars soil. But maybe it would give lilliputian me super powers, and I could get a second job as a crime fighter fighting crime in Orphan Alley! For fun, me and my Springfield friends would hit up my mini Las Vegas district, which is around the block to my Springfield National park so there’s a nice hiking view except the burning tires are down the hill so the walk may be nice but maybe it smells a little bit like burnt rubber. I would want to live in Apu’s apartment complex, because that’s the Springfield house I like best. It’s in my red and white district, and has a giant public pool.

    And here are my guesses for the TSTO addicts crew:

    Task 1: Ride the Monorail like it’s a roller coaster! (GOTTA BE Patric)
    Task 2: Be a bliss ninny about potty training! (Alissa?)
    Task 3: Statistically analyse the risks of a nuclear meltdown! (Safi, obv)
    Task 4: Get waxed for charity! (Wookee)

  5. This is a very fun idea.
    I just won the solid gold masion, so maybe I could move there before Lampwick finds it. My second house would be the a Heights beach house.
    As for a profession, I think I would work as an engineer at Powell Motors plant.
    For fun, I would be in Krustyland, my sporting/game area, or the concert area of my town.
    For a joint task, I would choose something with Maggie, or Santa’s little helper. I think they are two of the funniest characters in the show.

  6. Hi Russian Tiger,

    That was a very nicely written fun post. 🙂

    I would live in a house overlooking Springfield Falls.
    (that would be nice and relaxing)

    I would live near Moes Petting Zoe so I could help to look after the animals.
    (Because I love animals)

    I would work at the Pet Shop .
    (Again, because I love animals)

    I would ride the Ferris Wheel and visit Krustyland.
    I would also have an animated task to take my puppy dog for a walk.
    I would make An animated task for Bart to take Santa’s little helper for a walk
    (quite surprised this is not already a task option!)
    I would find where the character Wendell is hiding and invite him into our tapped out worlds and also Lewis too because they’re best friends.

  7. My issue is, I would have to live with seeing my dark sense of humour in reality. Having crowds stand around the exploding space rocket, next to a space shuttle that burns them all when tapped… Having the giant magnifying glass melting and burning interesting stuff. And much more….

    • If the little yellow folk need live in your dark virtual reality, the least you can do is join them for a day or two… Although reading your comment you might not make it back out. Mmm, I can see your reasoning behind your reluctance to relocate now.

  8. LOVE this post! I always try to design my Springfield as a place that I would want to live in myself! And, I think it is pretty obvious that I would work at the radio station or the TV station. But, admit that I would likely try to get Kent Brockman up in the helicopter, in hopes that he and Ernie have an accident. I’ve spent a lifetime working with tools like those two…

    That said…in my spare time, I’d volunteer as the town’s landscaper. More trees and shrubs! We’ll need the oxygen when Burns builds the giant dome.

    • 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣. Oh Patric you made me split my ribs laughing re. Brockman & Arnie. In my game I said I’d let you play golf if you were a good boy😊……….💜X

    • Worked with few of those myself, the advertising industry seems to bring the worst out in many. I’d do a 24hr joint task with Mr Burns over any of them, but alas that is only my virtual reality.

      To the monorail Patric, let’s escape to the….well wherever your monorail goes…..

  9. Hmm, great post and I’ll be thinking about this for ages but a starting point would be …
    Driving the Krustyland shutttle as I’d only be busy once or twice a day then off to Moes and hang out with Homer and the barflies, then crash in Bart’s treehouse sleeping it off.

  10. Hmmmm … living wise, I think Id take one of the beachside condos in Heights, although there is something about the painted slums in Little Rio that has an appeal.

    I think for work, I wouldn’t mind keeping with what my current line is, but the Springfield Shopper hasn’t hit town yet. I believe I’d try to land a job as a blackjack dealer at Monty Burns’ Casino. Maybe for a little side work I’d set up one of the Fleet a Pita vans somewhere around town.

    In my free time you could probably catch me watching a Springfield Isotope, Ice-otope or Excitement game somewhere in my arena district, then shoot over to the Gridiron or Stu’s Disco for the night.

    I think I’d like to hang out with Becky and we can steal Grampa and Mona’s feed the bird task chilling around the Pond. However, engaging in hand-to-hand combat ontop the Android’s Dungeon with Comic Book Guy could be fun.

  11. I couldn’t live in my Springfield. Would go insane doing the same few tasks over and over again, and only being able to say the same 3 or 4 things! :-p

    • That’s my reality so I probably wouldn’t notice too much difference, I really need get myself a life. 😀😀😀

  12. Great fun post Russian Tigger!
    I’d hang out in my mountain retreat listening to great sax music with Lisa.

    • I think I’d drop by to visit you in the mountains, but I promise not to try to be musical, I’d frighten away all the wildlife.

  13. I’m not sure if anyone had this happen but I logged in just before and it seemed to go back.
    1. Lost IRS building
    2. Pop up for the previous 7 day streak
    3. Gil trying to sell something random
    4. Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals we’re back for another 14 hours
    5. Many popups of previous prize tracks
    6. Tire fire is generating participation ribbons.

    Did I miss something or is my game messed up?

    • Correction. Found irs building but it lost it’s tap radius function. Also Homer can not pick up trash for rail yard and when I click on a character icon in the top left corner it don’t bring me to the character or their task menu.

      • I’m sure I’ve read that other tappers have had these problems and that you need to contact EA to sort them. I think I remember them saying that your game needs to be rolled back to before the problem started. Sorry I can’t be of any more help, good luck.

    • Oh no, you do t want to go live in a messed up game, could be Tron all over again.

  14. Shruken me would definitely have a vehicle that I could drive on actual roads! I would be up in the mountains in my Mountain Lodge where I am waited on by my happy and well-adjusted staff. I would definitely require Wi-Fi access, so I am not too, too off the grid. Great guest post Russian Tigger!

    • Wi-Fi, I didn’t even think of that, if there’s no Wi-Fi I’m going need some counselling, but I’d imagine they’d have one those at any mountain retreat….

  15. I might of mentioned it before but I would love to have the Addicts team as playable characters or even NPCs wandering my town. It wouldn’t take much work on EA’s part since they already have animated images in the banner and would be a nice thank you for all the promotion and free trouble shooting they provide for the tappers.

    • JUSTIN- That is such a cool idea. Love it. If Patric was good I’d let him play golf all day. If he was bad (too cranky) I’d position him next to the Sea Cpt wittering in his ear on a four hourly cycle😂. Wookiee would be in Krustyland 24/7 & Alissa would be a lady of leisure, going to Shorty’s, Jakes & posh eateries. Tiny Addict would be on play dates with Maggie or up to mischief at home. How cool would that be. EA could even run a yearly competition to become an ingame minature. Oh the possibilities. I’ll just be realistic tho & settle for a traditional glitch free Christmas update with new items (if I see those nutcracker men😡🤣🤣🤣)…….💜X

      • And just what have you done with Safi? Set him free in Springfield!

        • Yes, I remembered Safi after I had already pressed send, doh! He’d be working @ Frink’s & a guest lecturer at the University. In the evening I’d send him to watch French opera so he’d be guaranteed not to bump into any riff raff from the Elementary School😂……💜X

    • We could do anything we wanted to them, we’d be controlling the Addicts, now that would be fun…. I feel a Pinky & The Brain moment coming on, first we take over the Addicts then the world.

  16. Lilliputian me would probably be wondering why on earth that dysfunctional sky-finger me built sooooo many purple houses! 😀

    • And I’d be wondering why I needed so much barbed wire fence, I was obviously expecting the zombie apocalypse that the zombie sandwich unleashed

  17. I would spend sprinkles for the ability to create a Springfield Character of me self + name it + create My House + choose from a job at the School or Nuclear Plant or Springfield Heights + choose from a variety of 1 Hour 4 Hours 8 Hours 12 Hours 24 Hours Task(s) + can go on rides at Krustyland – you hear all of that EA?👍

    Yes, I virtually want in the game, minus the Tron results (lol)🤣

    • Me Too! Kind of like Matt G is in the game; But with some choices that can be made as per Russian Tigger’s post. (Surely the visuals have been done in Sim type games before? (It’s been many years since I’ve seen a Sims game)

      I had a kind of weird moment about a week or so ago; I dreamed I was playing the game in my sleep! – Now that’s a true addict! I woke up @ 3am walking down the hallway of my home & remembered the dream. (I needed to go to the donut van!?) I don’t watch The Simpsons show – which made things really surreal! I’m a sleepwalker, but have really no hankering to eat donuts!

      As to the scenario:- For me I’d not be a dentist (real life job – retired); I’d like to live maybe in the newest magical area I’ve created? Maybe being a red haired McGonagall would suit me very well? Goodness knows I’d love to be able to transform into a cat! That way I’d know what the 3 elderly men here were thinking (Cats aged 18; 9 & 9) – That would save me money @ the vet!

      Thanks for a great post & some fun RT!

    • I think if EA let us be in the game, we’d all spend our cash so fast the Ea servers would crash, followed by the economy.

  18. I had thought it might be interesting if a new character creation was introduced that permitted you to enter Springfield by proxy. EA could periodically add new quests involving ‘you’ and add more Jobs to earn over time, even some involving other Springfielders.

  19. Great post. 🙂
    I’d like to live in the future proofed home in my town as it’s right next to the airport. In case I need to disappear quickly.
    I’d be a professional gambler in my casino area, which kinda explains why I want to live near the airport!
    I’d like to hang out with Marge, which also explains the above. 😀

  20. Great dory and food for thought. I have simple tastes, so my cabin in the woods by the hot springs is good enough for my. I could even gave a zombie sandwich yo munch on if I get peckidh, or an entire Thanksgiving feast laid out nicely for my and my dysfunctional friends.

Leave a Reply