Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!
Now that the Pride 2020 event is officially in its final days…ends Wednesday…it’s time to take a look back at the dialogue of this event! Just in case you missed it by tapping too fast…
P.S. Don’t forget Springfield Showoff Submissions are due this evening (around 8pm ET). So, if you want your Pride Designs to be shown for Showoff get those submissions in…details here 🙂
The Pride of Springfield
Kent Brockman: Kent Brockman here live from the Alternate Springfield Pride where Mayor Quimby will kick off a first-of-its-kind pride parade, that’s not a parade at all. It’s a race! Think track and field but with a very big twist, which is that all the contestants must be in drag. A drag race, so to speak. Where they came up with that we’ll never know!
Quimby: What a great turn out. I never knew there were so many of you proud people. Thank you again for being here, and I look forward to leaving.
Lisa: This is truly beautiful. The gentle simplicity of people loving who they want to love.
Homer: Aww honey, that’s too bad.
Lisa: Dad, you’re not even listening to me!
Homer: I meant too good.
Make Lisa Judge Homer- 6s, Earns $35, 1xp
Make Homer Pretend to Celebrate Pride- 6s, Earns $35, 1xp
Marge: Homer, I’m racing in the Pride Drag Race.
Homer: I say no, it’s way too dangerous.
Marge: I’m not asking you for permission, Homie. I’m telling you.
Homer: Boy! You sure are a ‘bossy moo cow’ now that you feel all GOOD about yourself.
Marge: Well I’m certainly not a cow. What cow would have this Glamazon suit? Remember it?
Homer: Ooh la la!
Head Over Heels Pt. 1
Lenny: I gotta admit, this race thingamajiggy has sure got everybody goosed up.
Carl: No kidding, Lard Lad is even giving a year’s supply of donuts to whoever wins the race.
Homer: Whaaaa? Race?! What race?!
Lenny: How do they know what a year’s supply is?
Carl: They say the winner will receive an endless amount of donuts for a whole year.
Homer: Wait a minute. Do they realize what they’re doing here? This is… I can’t… *gasping* This is… I… so giant… mammoth. I can’t even-
Carl: Homer, you okay there?
Lenny: I think he’s having a heart attack!
Carl: It was just too profound for that little brain of his.
Make Homer Recover From a Heart Attack- 4 hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Collect Wigs- x105. 4hrs.
Dr. Hibbert: Phew, you sure did give us a scare there, Homer. But just in the nick of time, your insurance approved coverage.
Homer: I’m alive?
Dr. Hibbert: *chuckles* Yes, you’re very much alive and most importantly, can pay.
Homer: Did I miss the race?
Dr. Hibbert: The race in celebration of the LGBTQ and sometimes Y community? No, that’s on Saturday. Sign up is today.
Homer: Today?! Sorry doc I gotta go. At some point in every man’s life he hears his calling. His endless, sugary, buttery calling.
Head Over Heels Pt. 2
Homer: Lisa give me some dirt.
Lisa: What are you talking about Dad?
Homer: Like the old James Dean movies, you know? Give me some dirt. Don’t be a chicken. Hit your lights!
Lisa: Have you been to Moe’s? Oh my gosh! *gasp* It’s the Mysterious Waylon!
Mysterious Waylon: Well hello little girl!
Lisa: I should kiss your white-tipped French manicure for the great things you and all the girls have done for my mom!
Mysterious Waylon: You must mean Marge! Why look at you, the spitting image of her!
Homer: I’m not seeing it.
Mysterious Waylon: And Homer! What a surprise to see you here.
Homer: Wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world.
Lisa: Again, let me thank you for the inspiration, the revived inner woman that you’ve awakened in my mom.
Homer: Yeah, you did that. She’s meaner now, but there are some benefits that I can’t say in front of Lisa.
Make Homer Bet for Pink Slips- 4 hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Collect Wigs- x140. 4hrs.
Homer: Well it’s a drag race so how about we make a bet?
Lisa: Dad, it’s a celebration, not appropriate.
Mysterious Waylon: No, no, go on.
Homer: How about we race for pinks?
Mysterious Waylon: Pinks?
Homer: Pink slips!
Mysterious Waylon: How did you know the slip I’m wearing is pink?
Head Over Heels Pt. 3
Homer: I’ll show that Mysterious whatever. I’ll win this thing and I know just the guy to help me do it. Bart!
Bart: What gives Homer? That’s the ‘I need something voice,’ so let me tell ya what… Give me ten bucks now and it’ll give you a forty-five percent better chance of doing whatever lame thing you want me to do.
Bart: Alrighty lay it on me.
Homer: Remember the sweet car we made together? Well… more you than me… okay, all you, but I watched?
Bart: Uhh, Homer. That was a soapbox car.
Homer: Yeah, the soap box derby one. We need it again but bigger so I can fit in it. Please Bart?! I need that car so that I can win that drag race. I won’t get into all of it but it’s donut-related.
Bart: Got it. But Dad, hello, soap box cars don’t have an engine.
Homer: What in the? What?
Make Bart Explain Combustion Engines to Homer- 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp
Make Homer Have a Panic Attack- 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp
Collect Wigs- x175. 4hrs.
Homer: Alright so we need an engine. Done and done my boy, this old car of ours has one.
Bart: Yeah, uh, hate to tell you Homie but that ain’t gonna cut it.
Homer: Hold on, not so fast, this car could be a fine-tuned piece of automotive geniusness if left in the hands of the right people. That’s not us, Bart.
Bart: Hold on, I have an idea. What if I go around and “borrow” a few items from some people I know around town? Skinner and others, more “Skinner” than “others”.
Head Over Heels Pt. 4
Lisa: Dad! What did you do to the car?
Homer: And you probably thought your dad would never amount to anything.
Lisa: It looks insane! And what is it for?
Homer: The drag race! And this little honey will beat any car out there.
Lisa: Dad this is not a drag race that involves a car. It’s a drag race, where a man puts on a dress and makeup, then runs with his own legs in heels… Why this is happening, I have no idea. But it is what it is, you know?
Homer: What?! I bet the car on me using my legs? Oh no! Marge is gonna-
Marge: You did what?! Homer of all the dummy things you’ve ever done. This is the absolute, most, dummy- Well, probably not actually but it’s really, very, very dumb.
Make Marge Get Dolled Up for the Race- 1hr, Earns $70, 17xp
Make Homer Give Marge a Footrub- 1hr, Earns $70, 17xp
Collect Wigs- x210. 4hrs.
Mysterious Waylon: Marge, girl, you get over here, queen! And where’s that blob-in-a-dress husband of yours? I’m looking forward to leaving her makeup imprinted in the dirt.
Glamazon Marge: Well that’s the thing, uh, Homer didn’t understand that this was a race which would require him to actually use his own body because that would be impossible. He thought a pink slip was the title to his car like in the old racing movies. And so I wanted to ask you if there’s any way you would consider not taking our car if you win?
Mysterious Waylon: Honey, I didn’t hear a word you said. The race is starting, girl!
Kent Brockman: And they’re off, tucked, and out the gate. These dazzling ladies have inspired me to say, for the first time, a resounding, Yaaaaaaaaaaaaas Queen!
Head Over Heels Pt. 5
Kent Brockman: A blur of sequins and boas, these dames are both agile and fast. But not all, Marge Simpson seems to be floundering, pulling up the rear.
Barbara Streisman is pulling out to take the lead. Oh! Sideshow Melanie has blown a heel and tossed a wig. But what’s this?! The Mysterious Waylon is pulling out to take the lead. The Mysterious Waylon has won the race!
Glamazon Marge: *out of breath* Aw, I tried Homie but these girls are way better at navigating heels than I am.
Homer: Honey, it’s okay. We don’t need a car that much.
Glamazon Marge: The silver lining may be a lot more walking in our future and that’s good exercise!
Homer: Now I want the car.
Mysterious Waylon: Of course you do! Perhaps you might check yourself before you wreck yourself next time!
Mysterious Waylon: However, because I do like my Marge, I am willing to consider letting you off the hook. IF you would do some work in the club.
And of course, since this would be in the club you would need to be in full drag, makeup, wig, six-inch pumps.
Homer: Okay. How hard can it be to walk in six-inch heels anyway?
Make Homer Get His Heels- 4 hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Collect Wigs- x210. 4hrs.
If the Shoe Fits
Mysterious Waylon: Look at you! Sashay, sashay! Now what do you say?
PrideHomer : Balançoire, balançoire!
Mysterious Waylon: Good Homer, that’s an improvement on the French.
Pride Homer: You know you’ve really made me see something I’ve never seen before.
Mysterious Waylon: And what’s that?
Pride Homer: That I’m somebody too.
Mysterious Waylon: Ha ha, almost. And here’s an almost compliment. There’s a slight chance that you could even look good in a year or so.
Pride Homer: Thank you Mysterious whoever you are, you have made me better than I would have ever expected.
Mysterious Waylon: That’s the spirit! I’m going to share one of my free donuts with you Homer…Walk over here now as that most fierce queen you have finally learned to be and get it girl!
Pride Homer: Woo hoo!
Make Homer “Get It”- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Mysterious Waylon: You’ve really come far on this journey and I’m proud of you Homer.
Pride Homer: I’m fabulous. *belch* I must have these heels!
Mysterious Waylon: As long as you think of me when you wear them, they’re yours.
Pride Homer: Girl, who else would I think of? *belch* Too much rainbow beer I guess.
And that’s it my friends! What are your thoughts on the questline? Dialogue? Thoughts on the mini-event? Sound off below, you know we love hearing from you!