Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!
As we prepare for Act 2 of the Cirque du Springfield event to start next week, it’s time to wrap up Act 1 with a pretty little bow…in the form of the hilarious dialogue!
So here’s a look at the full dialogue for Super Freak…just in case you missed it by tapping too fast…
Milhouse: Bart, when’s it my turn?
Bart: You’ll get your turn when I say it’s your turn.
Milhouse: I thought when I shared my remote-control airplane, we’d actually SHARE it!
Bart: We ARE sharing it. I get to fly it, and you get to watch me.
Milhouse: Bart, look out! You’re going to crash into that tent! *toy airplane crashes*
Bart: *hands over controller* Okay, NOW it’s your turn.
Burnsum: Confound it. Who barn stormed my big top?! I forbid any looky-loos looky-looing at my extravaganza!
Bart: Extravaganza? What the heck is this?
Burnsum: Only the most popular circus in the world. The Burnsum and Bailey Circus!
Bart: Sure it is, P.T. Blowhard.
Burnsum: You’ll dance to a different calliope when you see the greatest freak show on Earth!
Bart: Freak show?! I’m in!
Make Bart Check Out the Circus– 6s
Make Milhouse Try to Find His Toy Airplane- 6s
Bart: Mom! Dad! There’s a circus in town with a freak show. I’ve got to get my freak on!
Marge: The Ding-A-Ling Bros. Circus has been in town for years.
Homer: Pass. I’ve ding-dong-ditched those Ding-A-Lings.
Marge: You’re still mad that they threw you out? You took the elephant’s peanuts.
Homer: Big deal. He wasn’t eating them.
Marge: He was about to but you sucked them out of his trunk.
Bart: Ding-A-Ling Bros. Circus is yesterday’s news. I’m talking about the Burnsum and Bailey Circus.
Homer: Ooh, new peanuts in town?
Marge: A new circus does sound fun. But leave the elephants’ peanuts alone!
Homer: Ah, c’mon!
Super Freak Pt. 1
Lisa: So what should we see next?
Bart: Freak show! Freak show!
Lisa: That sounds horrible.
Bart: It’s not what you think…or maybe it is. C’mon. I wanna pound a nail into the Human Pin Cushion.
Marge: Hold your show horses. We came here to spend time together as a family.
Homer: Then as a family, let’s check out the Amazing Smoking Monkeys. They’re so funny with their hacking coughs.
Bart: And then after, we hit the Tower of Tetanus rollercoaster!
Marge: How about the Hall of Mirrors? Those things make me look so goofy. Which I never am. *chuckles*
Bart: …or we could taunt the Elephant Pyramid with churros and watch them fall over.
Lisa: Ooh, we’re late. The main event is starting!
Marge: Darn. We must’ve spent too much time at the giraffe high wire show. Alright, everyone, let’s hustle.
Make Homer Go to the Main Event – 4hrs
Make Marge Go to the Main Event – 4hrs
Make Bart Go to the Main Event – 4hrs
Make Lisa Go to the Main Event – 4hrs
Collect Circus Peanuts- x115. 4hrs
Super Freak Pt. 2
Burnsum: And now, the tantalizing, trapezing Marguerite will perform her death-defying dive of doom!
Bart: Ugh “death-defying”? But we paid for death-EMBRACING!
Homer: Don’t worry, boy. She also performs her famous flop of fatality!
Lisa: Flip or flop, there she goes!
Marge: I’ve seen a lot of these moves trying to get Maggie into a bath.
Marguerite: *bows* Thank you all for supporting the circus. Be sure to tip your peanut vendor.
Burnsum: I now invite you all to join us in the Freak Show Tent to meet our performers.
Lisa: Ugh, I won’t support a venture that refers its own employees as freaks! It’s inhumane.
Homer: I’ll buy you cotton candy.
Lisa: Well, maybe I could take a peek.
Make Homer Go to the Freak Show Tent- 4hrs
Make Marge Go to the Freak Show Tent- 4hrs
Make Bart Go to the Freak Show Tent- 4hrs
Make Lisa Go to the Freak Show Tent – 4hrs
Collect Circus Peanuts- x115. 4hrs
Super Freak Pt. 3
Homer: Wow, there’s every oddity on earth in here!
The Human Donkey: You’re staring at me but I’m staring at you, fat man. Hee-haw!
Homer: Ooh, they even have a strongman! How would you like a steel rod bent over your head?
Bart: You know I would!
Burnsum: And over here, folks, is our trapeze star and most grotesque of all, Marguerite!
Marge: Marguerite, I just loved your performance. But…looking at you, you don’t seem freaky at all.
Marguerite: Oh, thank you but I have a hazel speck in my left eye.
Human Snail Guy: *shudders* Horrifying, isn’t she?!
Marge: Not at all, Human Snail Guy. Imperfections make everyone more interesting.
Human Snail Guy: Then you’ll love the slime trail I leave behind.
Marge: Yuck! Not all imperfections.
Make Marge Talk Marguerite’s Ear Off- 4hrs
Make Bart Shoot Spitballs at The Human Donkey- 4hrs
Make Lisa Feel Icky Inside- 4hrs
Collect Circus Peanuts- x115. 4hrs
Homer: Wow, Strongman. How can I get a body like yours? Get reborn and try a do-over. That was rude. I thought freaks were a merry bunch.
Human Snail Guy: Yes, that’s us, alright. Frolicking around a filthy tent in sawdust without a care in the world.
Homer: You can frolic?
Human Snail Guy: I’m a human snail. My frolicking only involves dodging salt.
Bart: Then dodge salted peanuts and frolic for the customers!
Human Snail Guy: *sigh* Yesterday it was pretzels.
Super Freak Pt. 4
Barney: Thanks for inviting me to the circus, Homer. Now explain why beer here tastes better than Moe’s? *burps*
Homer: That’s because circus beer is actually beer. Moe’s is a blend of things that aren’t beer.
CBG: I must admit everything under the big top is much more thrilling than I gave it credit.
Kumiko: What was your favorite part?
CBG: It would have to be the yard-long hot dogs. I’ve eaten a football field’s worth.
Wiggum: And they just shot the biggest hot dog I’ve ever seen out of that cannon!
Lou: Chief, that big “hot dog” was a circus performer.
Wiggum: Then that cannon cooked him pretty good. He had grill marks and everything.
Marge: These old-time acts take me back to when I was a child.
Homer: You went to the circus as a kid?
Marge: All the time. I had to retrieve Patty and Selma. They were always running off to join as Bearded Ladies.
Homer: I take issue with the “ladies” part.
Make Marge Reminisce About Her Early Years- 4hrs
Make Barney Enjoy Free Refills- 4hrs
Make Comic Book Guy Gorge on Hot Dogs- 4hrs
Make Wiggum Research Cannons – 4hrs
Collect Circus Peanuts- x155. 4hrs
Grampa: In my day the circus cost a nickel and that included a poking stick to taunt the tigers.
Burnsum: Our entry fees are still a nickel.
Grampa: Hot diggity! Gimme a stick and point me toward the man-eaters!
Homer: How can you afford to keep the circus animals fed at these prices?
Burnsum: The trick is short poking sticks. When the oldsters get too close…voila! Senior sirloins!
Homer: We should have brought Grampa here years ago!
Super Freak Pt. 5
Burnsum: And that concludes the Burnsum and Bailey Circus! I hope you all enjoyed the show! Now everyone out! Lingerers will be stomped by elephants.
Bart: Hey Burnsum, where’s the Bailey?
Ding A Ling Ringmaster: I’m Bailey — Burnsum’s old partner! And I’m back to challenge Burnsum for the Springfield audience! As if you could out-circus my Ding-A-Ling.
Burnsum : You’re too late, Bailey. I’ve already won these simpletons over. Ding-A-Ling Bros. Circus is old news.
Ding A Ling Ringmaster: Over my dead body!
Burnsum: That can be arranged. Bring in the cannon!
Ding A Ling Ringmaster: You’re not blasting me anywhere! And I’m not giving up Springfield without a fight!
Burnsum: Then it’ll be a fight to the death — my prancing ponies against your dancing poodles!
Make Marge Feel Uncomfortable- 4hrs
Make Homer Get Cotton Candy for the Road- 4hrs
Make Bart Still Be Unclear Who Bailey Is- 4hrs
Make Lisa Explain It – 4hrs
Collect Circus Peanuts- x195. 4hrs
And that’s it my friends, the full Act 1 dialogue for Cirque du Springfield! Stay tuned tomorrow for Act 2 to start!
Thoughts on the Act 1 dialogue? Prize track? Where do you think the story is heading? Sound off in the comments below, you know we love hearing from you!
Thank you for posting Alissa, thank you EA for keeping Act 1 fun and simple…. it’s a 🎪🤡 that’s silly and I like that! ☺️