Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!
BOMBARDMENT is back in Springfield! That’s right my friends…level 52 brings Coach Krupt back from no man’s land! Children of Springfield beware of flying balls!..
While we’ve had the Turbo Tappin’ walkthrough up since Level 52 hit, we thought now would be a fun time to take a look back at all of the fun dialogue you might have missed while tappin’…or just to relive all the fun again!
As we mentioned in the Level 52 rundown post Coach Krupt and the Springfield YMCA will cost you 120 donuts. Once purchased and placed in your Springfield his questline will start right up!
So now….let’s get this walkthrough going, shall we?!
Kruption Pt. 1
Coach K starts
Coach K: Look at all of these butterballs waddling through the hallways! Without some toughening up, I expect no more than half of them will ever become real men.
Lisa: Half of them are girls.
Coach K: Pfft. Girls are just men with female sex organs, two X chromosomes, and different hormones.
Lisa: That is surprisingly accurate. Are you sure you shouldn’t be teaching health?
Coach K: I teach one thing and one thing only – the game of BOMBARDMENT. And Home Brewing 101 at the Y on Tuesdays.
Reach Level 9 and Build Springfield Elementary
Make Coach Krupt Launch a BOMBARDMENT!- 8hrs, Earns $420, 105xp
Coach K: There’s only one rule in BOMBARDMENT – there are no rules. Except for the following rules – If you don’t get hit, you have survived the BOMBARDMENT. If you cry on my court, you will be disqualified for being a baby and face DOUBLE BOMBARDMENT! And I don’t believe in two things – daylight savings time and doctors’ notes. So if you’re late or try to claim a medical excuse to avoid BOMBARDMENT, tough! Now let me choose a victim, I mean volunteer, to BOMBARD.
Kruption Pt. 2
Lisa: That Coach Krupt is such a jerk!
Milhouse: Who does he think he is? Seriously, I’m not sure who he is. That ball hit me pretty hard.
Coach K: Men don’t make concussions. Concussions make men. Your general confusion is your manhood setting in.
Milhouse: I thought that was why I have hair growing in weird places.
Lisa: This is torture! Kids shouldn’t be forced to participate in these archaic rites of passage. Instead we should be learning cursive and the Dewey Decimal system.
Coach K: I administer the Presidential Fitness Exam around here, so that makes me the closest thing to the President. Does anyone else want to commit treason in the war on flab?
Make Students Train Strength & Agility- x6. Send 6 students. 4hrs. Earns $175, 45xp Freemium and $260, 70xp Premium
Kruption Pt. 3
Milhuose: Is that the bell or just a constant ringing in my ears?
Coach K: The bell? We’re not half done with class! Now I don’t care if you can’t stand, I want you running.
Lisa: Sir, while we can all agree Springfield’s children are on the rounder, softer, fatter side —
Uter: My insides were full of chocolate but now that trashcan is.
Lisa: — I think we can also agree that this seems a little barbaric.
Coach K: Did you just say… BOMBARDMENT?!?
Lisa: You know I didn’t say bombar- *WHACK!!*
Coach K: You said it that time.
Make Coach Krupt Teach Gym Class- 4hrs, Earns $260, 70xp
Make Students Suffer Gym Class- x6. Send 6 students. 4hrs. Earns $175, 45xp Freemium and $260, 70xp Premium
Milhouse: *Sob*… *sob-sob*
Coach K: First step of manhood, get out a good cry. Second step of manhood, never cry again.
Milhouse: You knocked out my teeth! And then I’m pretty sure you sold them to that man.
Moe: You can’t prove it and I’m not giving them back.
Kruption Pt. 4
Lisa: Coach Krupt has gone too far. I don’t care if he’s our coach — a bully is still a bully.
Milhouse: He’s not going to listen to us. But he might listen to a real man! We should go tell my dad.
Lisa: Hahaha! …Oh wait, you were serious?
Milhouse: Fine, we’ll ask your dad then.
Homer: Yes, children. I am dressed like Carmen Miranda, but you tell me one other outfit that gives you such instant access to fruit.
Lisa: Ummm… let’s just talk to Principal Skinner ourselves.
Make Lisa Tattle On Coach Krupt- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Make Skinner Listen to Complaints- 4hrs, Earns $175, 45xp
Skinner: I’m sorry Mr. Krupt, I’m a big fan of your no-nonsense aggressive teaching style, but we simply can’t afford another lawsuit. Our lawyer’s bail has been set too high as it is. So it pains me to say this, but I have to fire you.
Coach K: But I was so close to breaking their tender spirits!
Skinner: It’s no longer the job of teachers to break children’s spirits. We’ve passed that torch to college entrance exams and social media cyber-bullying.
Kruption Pt. 5
Skinner: Coach Krupt has been relieved from duty as your gym teacher, but physical education is still an essential part of the curriculum. So we’re going to do what the US does best and outsource. Here’s the sign up sheet for the YMCA.
Lisa: The only option here is dodgeball. Is dodgeball at all like bombardment?
Skinner: Of course not. Bombardment is spelled with a B.
Lisa: Hmm, I don’t like the sound of that.
Milhouse: Dodgeball could be fun. I come from a long line of dodgers, evaders, and hiders.
Make Students Play Dodgeball- x6. Send 6 students. 4hrs. Earns $175, 45xp Freemium and $260, 70xp Premium
Make Coach Krupt Coach at the YMCA- 24hrs. Earns $1,000, 225xp
Lisa: I hear the YMCA has a new physical education instructor.
Coach K: BOMBARDMENT!!!
Milhouse: We’ve been tricked! It was the greatest dodge of all: the administration dodging responsibility!!
And that completes Coach K’s questline!
Running from start to finish, with out using donuts, it will take you 1 day and 20hrs to complete. A short little premium questline…with a few FUN tasks!
What do YOU think of the new update? What are your thoughts on the characters chosen this time around? Have you purchased Coach Krupt? Any thoughts on the dialogue? How about BOMBARDMENT? Sound off in the comments below, you know we LOVE hearing from you!