What a Wookiee Wants… Holiday 2016 Edition

Hey howdy hey friendereenos!

So in the midst of Thanksgiving 2016, it’s pretty obvious that we’re just in the lull period before EA whallops us with the next big event centering around Christmas and the winter holidays and it occurred to me I haven’t done a What a Wookiee Wants (WAWW) in a while. I figured it might be time to posit some of my ideas. Alissa may have also told me a few people actually requested it and gently goaded me into writing something lol. Whatever the reason… here’s WAWW… the Holiday 2016 Edition.





Santa Flanders

Sorry, I just had to include these hilarious holiday photos. I guess it just shows what I want most is an awesome event that makes tappers happy. If you watched the Addicts Live video, you already know what I want most but to put it down in words… here’s a post illustrating my holiday wish list. What I’d like is some love for the other Holidays. We already got Festivus (a Seinfeld holiday) so why not some love for the other big holiday that comes at the end of the year. It’s time for Hanukkah.


Krusty, Rabbi Hyman Krustofsky, Dolph, Duffman, Kodos (intergalactic Judaism), Old Jewish Man, Artie Ziff, and possibly Kent Brockman are all Jewish. It’s time EA. My inspirations for this all started about a month ago when I was watching “Holidays of Future Passed” (S23:E9) and laughed at the Christmas Ignorers Billboard.


I got to thinking about my wonderful aunt who is one of the Chosen People and how Hanukkah could be done in our games. The first thing that springs to mind is a Chinese food restaurant a la the Holiday openings for “White Christmas Blues” (S25:E8) and “I Won’t Be Home for Christmas” (S26:E9).


Rabbi Krustofsky could totally be brought into the game as a ghost since we have Grimesy, Maude Flanders, and Dr. Marvin Monroe in the game already. He’d be easily introduced with Temple Beth Springfield. In “Like Father, Like Clown” (S3:E6), the sign of the Temple even mentions Christmas.


It’s this episode that first let’s us know of the Hasidic District on the Lower East side of Springfield. I’d love to get Yiddle’s joke shop or the chessboard Rabbi Krustofsky is seen next to. It might just be the Simpsons nerd in me but whenever I see Hasidic jews, I think, “Look, It’s ZZ Top.”


The version of Temple Beth Springfield  I’d love to see TSTO-ized is the one from “Clown in the Dumps” (S26:E1)… so beautiful.


The synagogue from (spoilers) Rabbi Krustofsky’s funeral is also magnificent. At first I thought it was Beth Springfield but there’s too many differences. In the worship center arena, I’d also settle for Temple Beth Western.


If you haven’t figured out, I would love a place for the Jews of Springfield to assemble to celebrate the Festival of Lights. One last suggestion is the synagogue from Krusty’s old neighborhood. They could even joke about his belated Bar Mitzvah.


And speaking of that neighborhood, while it’s not technically Hanukkah-related, Krusty revisits the stomping frounds of his boyhood in “Today, I am a Clown” (S15:E6). There’s lots of golden ideas to mine here… Circle K Mart, L. L. Beanie (Bargain Basement for Fin Yarmulkes), I Can’t Believe It’s Not Trayfe, Fantastic Schlomo’s (Payos Trims, Two For One!), and the DSL and Brazilian Wax Vendors.


We already got Stars of Fame in the Vegas Event, so why not class up the joint with the Jewish Walk of Fame?


In the vein of all this, I’d also love this building from “I Don’t Wanna Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” (S19:E4).


Or how about a different toy store, or Jewish Mr. T, or a Hanukkah-themed Wolverine Krusty?


But of course, there’s other ideas. In one of the first images in the post, we see Dr. Hibbert, Carl, and Lou celebrating Kwanzaa. I’m not completely sure how this could be done respectfully but it could be fun and give the three men skins for the game. I guess what I really want is just some sort of Non-Denominational Holiday Mixer hosted by Krusty.


Basically everyone just getting along in this fractured and divided world. The world could be a whole lot better with a bunch more hugging.


But in the interest of being inclusive in my wishes for the Holiday Event, I have a few other ideas. The first involves EA finally bringing back Santa. They spent the time making a version of him for the game that just appeared and disappeared in 2014. They did this again to us with Lyle Lanley and while I don’t want to use a racist term for giving something and then taking it back, it bummed me out that Santa went back to the North Pole after seeing him in all his vitality.


How about EA makes amends and brings the jolly fat guy back as a playable character? I think it’d be fun for him to run the Santa Academy from the very first Simpsons episode ever. Barney and Kang and more could all get jobs as Santas!


You may not know this about me, but I lived in Japan for six years of my life and when I think of Christmas Eve, I actually think of Kentucky Fried Chicken. It’s super popular there courtesy of an ad campaign done by KFC in 1974 called “Kurisumasu ni wa kentakkii!” Basically Kentucky equals Christmas and KFC is synonymous with Christmas in the country. The show has its own version which could be funny for the holiday event. I’m sure Akira and Kumiko would be happy with this.


I joked on the videocast that it’d also be funny to just do Halloween for Christmas.


Of course, December now means something completely different for a Star Wars fanboy like me. It’s far-fetched but I’d love some Cosmic Wars in the town. They did a whole parody of the Star Wars Christmas Special in  “I Won’t Be Home For Christmas” (S26:E17) that you really should watch. I’m not gonna spoil that amazingness. I’ll just cross my fingers for a Gingerbread Death Star in honor of Rogue One. Life Day in TSTO might make this Wookiee squeal in glee.


Star Wars even ties into my dream of Springfield Hanukkah.


Other ideas for the event include snowboarding all over our towns or the ice rink which was behind the Simpson house in “‘Tis the Fifteenth Season” (S15:E7). We could get the billboard for Krusty’s Kristmas Karol or even spruce up the Tire Fire. See? I didn’t forget Christmas completely.


Hopefully we see some Hanukkah and more that shows love for all the Fall Holidays. I fear that if we don’t, I can’t be held responsible for what Krusty might do to all the reindeer.


So there you go. Some of my ideas for the 2016 Holiday Event. What do you think of the ideas. Is it time to get Chewish like Piranhas in the game? I’m sorry, I know that joke is Torah-ble but I just really want to see the Festival of Bites in TSTO. Sound off with your thoughts and any other ideas you might have. The truth is we’re all probably too late and will get what we get but it’s always nice to express our thoughts. Who knows what we might influence in the future. L’Chaim!

TTFN… Wookiee out!

35 responses to “What a Wookiee Wants… Holiday 2016 Edition

  1. REALLY random comments but could you add a ‘What A Wookie Wants’ WordPress tag to all these posts so I can follow the tag on the WordPress Reader, on the app. I would just like them all together anf you can’t follow catagories

  2. I would welcome a Hebrew fueled TSTO Xmas Event (even if it’s just 1 of the 3 Acts) …..

    All I’m asking for is:

    Santa Claus as permanent character
    Santa Claus works at Krustyland off Season
    (He’s got a forclosed mortgage up North to pay off)
    Allow excess Holiday Decor in Krustyland
    Give Us new Xmas Building, Attraction, Ride in Krustyland

    Can you tell that I think Krustyland has been ignored for too long? 😉

  3. This was fantastic. That was also encyclopedic. Great read and hope they do it.

  4. Love all your ideas! Looks like you have done all the work for them. What I hear you describing is an upcoming event.

    Since Hanukkah and Christmas are celebrated at the same time this year, maybe they will have two events running at the same time. Last year we tapped on festive people, maybe this year it could be reindeer. It would be a great task to see Krusty in the dump truck, “collecting” all the reindeer for you lol. That would be a cool animation to see!

    Maybe they could even make it so each player will decide for themselves, which mini game they want to play. Or they can play both if they so choose. Maybe they will have a side game within the winter event.

    I want a Jewish section of my town, bring on the Jewish buildings! I want a Temple Beth Springfield for my Springfield! And make it free! Once you place it you start the Hanukkah event!

    Happy Hanukkah!

  5. LOVE IT 🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕎✡️

  6. As always WAWW never disappoints.

  7. Someone stole my burrito™

    OMG, these are really good ideas, Wookie. They have to do Hanukkah this year, they just have to. How many years have we been asking for it? So much humor and funny stuff. Love the the Chinese restaurant with the big window. The Krusty Burger road kill truck is genius. The ice rink, the giant fire place, ha ha. I’d love a giant blow up Schlomo for my Springfield. Great ideas as always. Thanks.

  8. I just noticed that the versions of the Temple Beth in “Like Father, Like Clown” and “Clown in the Dumps” are actually the SAME TEMPLE. We just only see the lower far right side of the temple (and the sign) in “Like Father, Like Clown.” Or at least that what it seems like. If so, it makes me extremely happy that writers and the animators still pay such close attention to their work. 🙂

  9. Little Kenny Brockelstein – oh yeah he’s Jewish. As I duck the thrown shoes I’ll second the Springfield Heights Chrismahanukwanzakah event!

  10. Have a tiptop Tet!!

  11. I’m hoping that with this Christmas event comes Brodka, from Marge Be Not Proud, which itself was a christmassy episode

  12. That’s right Alissa. You tell him. No one can just ruin another’s fun and hard work tapping. And their anticipatory energy can be stifled and crush by the reading of a spoiler. I mean for f’s sake it’s called a SPOILER. root word being spoil which comes from the Latin word for “don’t be a selfish dumbass”

  13. People goading and requesting a WAWW? Really? Who would do that? *slowly raises hand* 😉
    Great post, as usual. I wasn’t a major fan on the Hanukkah idea but reading this post has seriously made me want it! Sounds great 😁
    I want a Christmas Light Turn On theme where we get NIGHT MODE and there is a big Springfield light turn on ceremony (help Springfield decorate – Maybe Martha Stewart visits to help bring Christmas Cheer).

    I have a feeling we might get a North Pole inspired event judging by an image in the files. But I don’t care what it is – I just LOVE Christmas)

  14. Mmmm… Kentucky Fried Panda…

  15. I’d like Santa, reindeer, (I envy the reindeer in my neighbours’ Springfields), and land (preferably on the SH side) for the holidays.
    Whether it’s Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, or a mixture of all of them is fine by me. Maybe I’ll even learn more about other people’s holiday celebrations 😀

  16. I was think what about Troy McClure. He was quite regular and correct me if I am wrong but he has not been in our game

  17. What the Wookiee said!

  18. Hmmmmmm. Wasn’t Krampus mentioned, that can’t be good.

  19. Remember the “The arrival of a brand new outlet mall?” In the Superheroes 2 takedown app store description? We may be getting a Holiday themed mall update, where we could build inside Springfield mall.

    • Then two years later, they can forget it exists like Krustyland, and stop issuing stuff for it…I still want the limited edition rides for Krustyland, but doesn’t look like those will come back anytime soon.

  20. Yes, yes and yes yes yes! I definitely want a Hannukah side to this event for a change. It has been a long time coming!

  21. EA pls bring back the Christmas snow globe. Thanks

  22. Great article, but I think we’re going to have a Springfield Heights Christmas! Hahaha I’m sure everyone would loooooove that.

  23. Hello, is any one having problems buying donuts. It keeps claiming I have no account.

  24. talon8770 // /rick m

    The 5th pic down from “Clown in the Dumps” looks exactly like my sons old pre school The Temple Bethel. hes 30 now but the building is still in operation.

  25. AddictoftheCentury

    Wow Wookiee. Top-notch!!!

  26. Wow! I have wanted a Hannukah event for a loooooooong time! Who knows, maybe one day. With a menorah lighting each of the 8 nights in the middle of Springfields, it would be the miracle of the Maccabeans all over again! I love any festive season, but Hannukah is closer to my heart! Thanks Wookie! 👍👍👍👍🌞💟

  27. I love all of your ideas, but I especially love the Temple Beth Springfield building. Beautiful.I want an outside skating rink so the kids can ice skate like in Peanuts. 🙂

  28. Interesting. Would love a Hanukkah event. I’m sure I’ll be appeased easily.

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