Tapped Out Premium Walkthrough: Üter Zörker

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

Back with another full dialogue walkthrough.  This time we’re covering the premium Level 45 Character, Üter!  Üter’s questline is pretty amusing, and brings other characters into play as well, it’ll even get a premium character like Hank Scorpio involved (if you have him)!

While we’ve had the Turbo Tappin’ walkthrough up since the update first hit (you can view it here) I know many of you still love going back and reading old walkthroughs.  They’re great if you missed any of the dialogue while playing the level, or if you just want to know what to expect if you purchase Üter.  So for those that may have missed it (or for those of you that want to live it again)…I bring you all the fun and humor of Üter…and what happens when You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter…..

Uter 3 thehungryhun_menu

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 1
Uter starts

Lisa: Welcome back, Uter!  So much has changed since you’ve been gone. Mostly the locations of things and that our currency is donuts now.
Uter: Donuts? Sweet sugary donuts?
Lisa: You can’t eat them. They’re legal tender.  Well, semi-legal — legal tender is usually transferable.
Uter: Then I will have to forgo donuts, and eat a healthy breakfast instead.
Make Uter Enjoy Candy for Breakfast- 8hrs, Earns $420, 105xp

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 2
Uter starts

Uter: Oh no, ze first day of school and my lederhosen are filthy!  What else can I wear? Pants WITHOUT suspenders?  The children will make fun of me for sure.  Perhaps I can make a fresh pair out of ze curtains, just like ze Von Trapps!  Oh no – these curtains are filthy too! Back to Plan Acht!
Make Uter Wash Lederhosen- 1hr, Earns $105, 26xp

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 3
Skinner starts

Skinner: Hello, Uter. Or as they say in your country — Hallo, Uter.  I honestly thought Springfield being destroyed would make you want to go back home.
Uter: No no, I must attend your American school system to get grade A American education, Principal Skinner!
Skinner: Well, the Department of Education actually gave our grade A American education a D minus.  But no “learning” today, Uter.  While in Europe you might learn on Saturdays, and give wine to babies, here in America Saturdays are strictly for non-learning.  I’m just here to supervise a Sci-Fi convention in the school gym.
Uter: I love sci-fi! Almost as much as deep fry!
Skinner: Then come on in, Uter – your enthusiasm and girth will fit right in.
Make Uter Attend Sci-Fi Convention- 4hrs, Earns $260, 70xp

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 4
Uter starts

Uter: Wraps of Khan and Chocolate Cookies Of The Fried Kind – this is paradise!
Nelson: Uter, you old so and so! I haven’t seen you in ages.  We’re way past-due on your last wedgie appointment.  I’m going to have to do a full bully overhaul – wedgie, swirlie, noogie, maybe even a swonkie.  If I move my next Haw-Haw appointment, I should be able to squeeze you in…to a locker.
Uter: Please, no! Don’t make me run, I am full of chocolate!
Make Uter Run While Full of Chocolate- 24hrs, Earns $1,000, 225xp
Uter: Out of the vay!  My nurples must not become purple!
Hank Scorpio: These conventions are a great place to find social misfits with genius-level IQs for my superweapon project.  Plus pick up some more slammers for my Pog collection.
Nelson: Get back here, nerd!
Hank Scorpio: Of course, I also usually nab some hired muscle in the process.  That kid would be a great candidate for my Henchboys to Henchmen program.

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 5
Uter starts

Uter: If I run another step, I will yodel!
Nelson: When I get my hands on you, you’re getting a beating American-style!
Uter: Oversized portions and no apologies!   I need a place to hide. A place that is safe, secure…and, hopefully, full of candy.
Make Uter Hide in the Kwik-E-Mart- 8hrs, Earns $420, 105xp
Apu: I believe your bully has gone, young customer. But feel free to continue to eat our imported chocolate…imported from the Shelbyville Discount Candy Emporium.
Uter: Thank you for your hospitality – I shall never nougat it!  Haha, candy humor. Auf Wiedersehen!

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 6
Uter starts

Uter: I don’t feel well. It could be a cramp from all that exercise.  Or perhaps it was that candy-less candy apple I ate earlier. Nature lies about its candy!   Perhaps I should meet with herr doktor…
Make Uter Visit the Doctor- 12hrs, Earns $600, 150xp
Uter: Do you know what is wrong with me, herr doktor?
Dr. Hibbert: Oh I’m no hair doctor, although I do like to take care of my locks. Heh-Heh-Heh.  Uter, you have what I call the Rocky of diabetes – types one through seven.  But you also don’t have any American health care, so on your way.

You Got Your Schokolade in My Erdnussbutter Pt. 7
Uter starts

Uter: Maybe I should take the advice of my cousins Hansel and Gretel and round out my diet.  A steady regiment of breadcrumbs and houses!  Strange, all this talk of food is making me hungry.
Make Uter Have Second Breakfast- 12hrs, Earns $600, 150xp

The following will prompt if you have Hank Scorpio

The Rule of Two Pt. 1
Hank Scorpio starts

Hank Scorpio: Ah, look at that big kid chase that pudgy kid. What a beautiful time in a young monster’s life.
Nelson: Come back here, nerd!  When I catch you, I’m going to give you an Indian burn so bad you’ll open a casino.
Hank Scorpio: *sigh* Really takes you back. Reminds me of when I made Henry Kissinger pee his pants in pre-school.  I think he was picking up his daughter.
Make Nelson Shake Down Nerds- 12hrs, Earns $420, 100xp
Make Hank Scorpio Reminisce- 12hrs, Earns $600, 150xp

The Rule of Two Pt. 2
Hank Scorpio starts

Hank Scorpio: Excuse me, Mister Muntz. Have you ever considered a career as a goon, a thug, or a hoodlum?
Nelson: Those were the exact careers listed on my career aptitude test.  And US Senator.
Hank Scorpio: The world needs leaders, Nelson.  And those leaders need faceless ruffians behind them to help stomp out the competition.  What you need to do is create a program that you can organize in your own megalomaniacal image.
Nelson: You had me at megalomaniacal image.
Hank Scorpio: So the very end?
Nelson: I’m a slow learner.
Make Nelson Organize Bullying- 8hrs, Earns $275, 70xp
Make Hank Scorpio Oversee Bullying Program- 8hrs, Earns $420, 105xp
Nelson: The Advanced Muntz Organization of Bullying, or A MOB, thanks you for your donation, doofus.  Please enjoy these complimentary return address stickers that I’ve punched into your stomach.
Milhouse: *ooof* I feel better having donated to a deserving cause.
Hank Scorpio: Look at the little scamp go, punching stomachs and administering wedgies like a future Fortune 500 owner.  What is this thing I’m feeling? Pride?… No, it’s gas. Shouldn’t have eaten that gas station sushi.

The following will prompt if you have Otto…

The Magic School Bus
Uter starts

Uter: I cannot wait to see all my school friends again.  I am sure they will be happy to see me again, too.
Make Uter Sit Alone on the Bus-
4hrs, Earns $260, 70xp
Otto: Whoa, little dude, I didn’t even notice you sitting there.
Uter: You’ve been sitting on me for half an hour.
Otto: I thought you were a bean bag chair. I guess I solved the mystery of the screaming bean bag chair.
Uter: Oh wise bus driver, I feel so alone. My only friends are the ones I eat.
Otto: Whoa, dude, never eat your friends. If they’re anything like Dave, they’ll get super mad.

And with that you’ve completed Uter’s questline!
What do YOU think of the dialogue?  Did you enjoy his questline?  Did you have the premium characters involved in the questline?  Thoughts on Uter being added as a character?  Sound off in the comments below, you know we LOVE hearing from you!

8 responses to “Tapped Out Premium Walkthrough: Üter Zörker

  1. No, man. Check and Chong, man. You know, the two funny guys!

  2. What??…nooo man…I’M DAVE MAN…HEY COME ON MAN….

  3. you guys never explained another update, but the game is updating AGAIN right now.

    • What on earth are you talking about? There has been no updates.

      • I had a HUGE update about 2:30pm CST yesterday. Took over an hour without WIFI and then nothing new in the game.

        • That sounds like the patches going through. NONE of my 5 devices updated yesterday. Not a single one. iOS or Android. Could be yours missed some of the previous updates. The new one that just hit this morning loaded…this morning.

  4. Dave’s not here, man!

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