From the Mouths of Addicts: Brooders Guide to TSTO Events

ATTENTION: For those who don’t like to actually read the words in the post but skim for keywords (like update) and then freak out thinking something is going on.  If you actually bother to read the post, it’s satire.  THERE IS NO NEW EVENT right now! (or update or anything)  (which is why it doesn’t have update in the title.)  

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

Welcome to another edition of From the Mouths of Addicts, where YOU get to sound off on anything and everything in the world of Tapped Out!  This week’s post comes to us from a frequent commenter, lover of all things NPC and regular at the Addicts pub of life, Brooders!

Brooders, Big Phil and I were having a conversation just this morning over on TOuk about my upcoming vacation (last week of June), and how I hope Bunny’s well enough to cover Addicts for the week…otherwise I’ll either have an unhappy husband or unhappy readers.

At the encouragement of Big Phil, Brooders was more than happy to throw her name into the ring to run the site in my absence (just in case).  What you find below is her “audition” so to speak, and how she’d handle things if I were away for a week.

Hope you enjoy it, because I know I couldn’t stop laughing…

Note I’m not really looking for someone to run the site while I’m gone.  It was just a joke that turned into this hilarious post..

Take it away Brooders…and try not to blow the place up…

mouths of addictsbrooders

Howdy yawl ♡

Alissa is taking a well earned break so I’m in charge! (until she reads this and fires me)

…So pay attention and read all posts carefully…YES that includes  YOU…


TSTO Event is LIVE!

…It’s alive! ALIVE!!!

As always it’s an automatic update and you’ll need Homer and/or Lisa free to start with a few 6 second tasks then a build.

Eughhh. ..6 seconds…takes sooooo long…I need it ALL now!

Take Your Time…Don’t Panic…Stop Freaking (me) Out!

Yes there will be a Calendar, SIB, Walkthrough, WDTCF etc…*rolls eyes*

Bugs and Glitches Report 

Stop bugging me …you’re making me all glitchy…thEAy will fix it eventually!

In game update…Patch

Arrrrr… see…take your eye patch off its fixed already…

Event Calendar 

Erm…what day is it? Month? Year? The link only opens for Sandra anyway.


…just keep tapping. ..
…just keep tapping…
…just keep tapping…

Turbo Tapping

…just keep tapping faster…

Should I Buy (SIB)

Only buy if it’s a really useful non playing character (NPC). Unless you’re Ryan don’t bother with anything else that isn’t an NPC.

However, if you really really really want it regardless of its uselessness then get it.

What are you asking me for?  Buy it if you want it…*rolls eyes again*

Brooders Technical Corner

1) Throw it against a wall!
2) Call EA and blame them
3) Get free bonuts after 3 calls
4) Buy a new device with more memory with the money you saved

Brooders Question Time

Why? What? Where? When? Who?

…Did you actually read the post…???

Brooders 101 …Neighboureenoos

Yes visit.
Me first.

WDTCF Where Did That Come From?
WTF…The Simpsons or EA obviously…*giggles*

Gil Deal

Just say no! The deal will soon disappear from sight. ..never to return.


Conform or else…no ☆☆☆☆☆ for you!

Springfield Show Off!

*flashes* Your turn!

Last call for the event 

…just spend it all now for gawd sake…

Caption This

*flashes again*

Brooders Sunday Open Innuendo Thread

Ha ha haaaaar!  Beat you Lee!

(Monday morning)…Oops! Sorry everyone I missed Sunday again too much time spent in the pub ♡

Comment…do it now…I’ll push it through quick…while she’s not here…*giggles*…*winks*…

Cheers yawl


Nuclear Option Vid SS

No actual events were launched in the writing of this post…thank God! 😉

Thank you Brooders for your scary insightful take.  But uh…I think we’re going to go in another direction.

Did you enjoy Brooders’ take?  Happy I don’t leave her in charge?  Did it at least provide you with a good post event giggle?  Sound off in the comments below, you know we love hearing from you!

We love showcasing your words for the world, and TSTO Community, to read!  Here’s your chance to sound off on anything and everything in the world of Tapped Out.  Simply send in your posts to our Addicts email account: (many of you already do) and we’ll do the rest!  So send us your posts…we can’t wait to see what you have to say!

101 responses to “From the Mouths of Addicts: Brooders Guide to TSTO Events

  1. This was the most useful event breakdown / roadmap on the site to date.

  2. I’ve been poking around after a couple weeks out of pocket….and I just have to say…I gotta sign off after that.

    Brooders – – – – you made my sides hurt. Only thing that would’ve been better….nope, nothing, absolutely nothing comes to mind. Sheer comedic perfection. You can fill in anytime. Got my vote.

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