What is a spy to do when he gets cold? Go undercover of course. Speaking of that, boy do I love my sleep. The lady Addicts could tell you I’m sometimes in a class all my own. Is it hibernation maybe? I don’t know. Anywho… so today I slept in a little and when I got into my town I was like “Holy Jebus, I’m popular!”
Creepy lurking eyes in pyramids were all over Wookieetown. Seriously… anyone else think those shifty eyes are a little unsettling? Do the images at least make you feel the feels? Jeez those things give me the heebie jeebies.
Alright… getting to my point… as I was unspying my town and wishing I’d woke up earlier to earn more emblems, I started noticing a pattern for the spying of my neighboreenos. Slowly, I’m seeing what kind of spies YOU really are.
The lodge hunter spy- Most of us have at least one of these spies visiting us. They seek out and surveil our Stonecutter lodges and then disappear without a trace. Some say it’s greed and the need for 5 emblems but I’m willing to admit they took Number One’s dialogue very seriously. You know he now controls the sky finger.
Of course, there are lodge hunters we find tapping elsewhere. Nothing wrong with trying to get 5 emblems when possible. These are the spies I know have a lot more time than me. Like full-time James Bond-style spying. They want their emblems shaken, not stirred. I’m a little wary of these spies because they mean business and sometimes know a judo kick or too. Only thing Judo about this Wookiee is ju don’t know what I’m gonna write about on any given day lol. Some spies are much more serious. I guess some folks just like to watch.
The lazy spy – Kinda what I think of as the Austin Powers spy. They’re having so much fun being groovy baby so they tap wherever they end up. Doesn’t matter what you hit since you look so cool while your doing it, right? You can easily uncover their snooping in quick rows, often close to your lodge. Jokes on you though because they saved so much time for sexy shagging.
The all-over-the-place-perhaps-they’re-lost spy. You know, like Mr. Bean decided to spy in your town and you wonder what Lincoln’s cabin, the Krusty Burger and a ghost zapper have in common. Either this spy just wanders around and surveils at random or a historical ghost needs to watch their cholesterol.
The animation spy. I detailed a lot of the really cool animations that result from all the current acts of espionage and some folks seem to have certain ones they insist on watching. I admit, if the Bad Dream House or Puppy Dog Store are available… they’re probably getting snooped by this fuzzball.
The Krustyland Security Team – As a theme park connoisseur, I’ll be the first person to admit some sort of surveillance is needed at them. Just look at Vegas (the sleaziest theme park for adults EVER), lots of spying going on there for good reason. That being said, the spies in my KL drive me a little nucking futs. Just when you think you’ve gotten rid of every creepy pyramid possible, a quick jaunt over to your KL will prove they’re watching you there as well. I never get my 5 emblems from these but c’est la vie.
In all fairness, there’s also those considerate spies. Not every spy is a Rosenberg, Benedict Aronold or Mata Hari. Some people are just doing what Number One told them to and making sure you can find those creepy eyes quickly to gather emblems. The whole point is to socialize and help each other get all the cool stuff, right? The price of that this time is the some surveillance of our home turf. Personally I thank these friends who cluster near my Lodge. Only time I like going searching is when my Museum of Natural History gets some action. These spies definitely aren’t the Bond bad guys.
Going one step further, you ever wonder what all the spying is really doing? I mean, Number One told us it was to keep the versions of him in alternate universe’s from getting him but that only make sense with Stonecutter buildings. Just what exactly is going on at the Springfield Skating Rink? You think the Grumple is working on an ice spectacular for the next holiday event? Is Wayne battling Ukrainians? Does he realize most Ukrainians are actually battling Russia? Is Anna Semenovich or Maria Mukhortova secretly couples skating with Elvis Stojko? Now that’d be something I’d be angry to miss. Beautiful figure skaters certainly would explain the zamboni incident.
We know the brown house is full of shenanigans like paintballing and squatting among other things but is something else going on. You know those look like cabins straight out of Camp Crystal Lake. Also reminds me of a couple piney residences I delivered pizza to in my New Jersey days. Ask Alissa if you don’t know what that means.
The antics in the Retirement Castle probably could be entertaining. We all know old folks do zany things. What about the Android’s Dungeon. Even if CBG is just berating his young clientele, I’m positive there’s some amazing merch to check out. So much spying to do and it’s all done on the cheap.
There must be so much weirdness going on we have no clue about. Puppies being petted, firearms being greased, moles being silenced, drunks doing silly stuff… the possibilities are endless. This leads me to just one question, what do you think is going on? Do you know what kind of spy you are? Got some examples of either you want to share?
Well, I gotta run because my friend dawn is up to her surveillance shananigans and I think wookieemama probably randomly tapped items like normal. Keep on spying in the free world and stay groovy my friends.
TTFN… Wookiee out!