5 Things For Which I Am Thankful…That DIDN’T Happen!


There is something about being a pragmatist, along with just a smidge of crankiness and pessimism that keeps life interesting, when summing up a list of a “things for which I am thankful.”

It has been written that “When you are a pessimist and bad things happen, you live the events twice…once when you worry about them, and again when they happen.” I don’t know who said this…but they were likely hit by a bus while tapping this into their Facebook status.

However, this is one of the key arguments that people use from the “Why Worry Be Happy” school of thought, while pointing out the futility of spending time and energy on worrying.  I choose to think that you get a double “reward” for your efforts.

So, when we come to a holiday like Thanksgiving, when we are tasked to come up with a list of things for which we are thankful, I think it is entirely within the spirit of the day to be thankful for a short list of things for which I am thankful, because they DIDN’T happen!!

Let’s take a look…

  1.  I Didn’t Croak. This seems like an obvious one to most people, but the fact is, you don’t start really noticing that you didn’t croak, until you reach the age where croaking is more and more likely statistically.  Some would say that being in my “early 60s” (I prefer to just call it my 60s, as there is nothing young or early about being in your 60s), that I am still well below the national average for croaking of 78 years old, which is a RECORD HIGH according to a recent USA Today article. Tell that to a bunch of my friends who have croaked over the past couple of years. Oh. Wait. You can’t. Because they croaked. So, any day you can get up, and start the day by saying, “Hey…I didn’t Croak!” is a good start.
  2. My Padular Device Didn’t Croak.  This is probably less obvious to many of you, but when you are as addicted to TSTO as I have admitted to being, not being able to tap would feel like a fate worse than death.  This is of course an immense exaggeration, because not being able to tap would be a completely moot point, if I were indeed dead.  Although, when you think about it, we have several dead characters wandering around our Springfields, who seem to be able to carry out any number of tasks (although limited to no more than 24 hours at a time), so who knows???  Maybe there IS tapping after you croak.  But, tapping after you croak would still require a padular device, so you still need to be happy your device didn’t croak. And I am.
  3. None of the Key TSTO Characters have Croaked. Yes…you are probably noticing a theme here…but croaking, even in a Freemium Game can be pretty final and game-altering (unless you are Maud).  Think how much the game would change if Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa or even (GASP!!) little Maggie were written out of the game!  It would be really hard to start any update without at least one or two of them, as they seem to be integral to every update we get in TSTO. So. one of them croaking would be devastating!  It could happen!!  I mean, they subject these characters to any number of perilous activities…fighting giant turkeys not the least of them!  But thankfully, none have croaked thus far, and our updates start as they should, with one of these characters kicking things off (as opposed to kicking the bucket…which is much like croaking, but makes an entirely different sound).
  4. None of My Favorite Secondary Characters Have Croaked.  As I get older, I begin to identify with some of the “older folks” in TSTO.  As I have written about before, I keep Grandpa and Mona happily feeding pigeons into the tiny black hole near the Super Colider. One is old, the other is dead, but both are keeping Space/Time safe, as only someone who is “on the other side” and someone “near the other side” could do.  I am equally happy to keep Agnes in front of the SprawlMart greeting customers. It reminds me that if I get too old for this blogging gig, that I always have a fallback job.  And let’s not forget about the “Old Jewish Man” who has figured out another source of retirement income with his “Drop Pants for Change” task.  They all give me hope for a life of continued relevance, and I’m glad they didn’t croak (except for Mona of course).
  5. Alissa hasn’t had me whacked. I know…whacked is just another term for croaked, but at the hands of someone who brings about croaking with an act of whacking.  If anyone had the power to set me up, lure me in, and then have me whacked (yes, I watch WAAAAY too much Orphan Black), it was Alissa.  To the contrary, the most amazing thing about burying the hatchet and letting all of the water run under the bridge (which are seemingly two completely unrelated acts with similar outcomes as long as one of the hatchets isn’t buried in the other person’s back…poor, poor, Willie), is that we have reformed our friendship. This is a friendship based upon enduring, surviving, and waking up every morning knowing that there are going to be comments to be moderated, updates explained, and tasks to unravel. In short, it is a friendship forged through similarities, while overlooking our differences.  For this…I am truly thankful.

So there you have it. Five GREAT reasons to be Thankful…and only four of them dependent upon Not Croaking.

Here’s to another great year of being thankful for things not happening! I will be sharing the holiday with my family and an expertly cooked 24 lb. turkey! (Hey…someone had to croak!).

25 responses to “5 Things For Which I Am Thankful…That DIDN’T Happen!

  1. I am thankful that swmbo hasn’t found the PayPal email receipts for the dohnuts I have bought.

    Oh Patric good luck with number 3 for the next year….⛙2😉

  2. It seems that I’ve learned two new words today. I’m from Sweden and even though I sometimes hear that I speak and write English well I know that my vocabulary is not as good as someone who was born in a country where English is the native language. Until today I had never heard the word croaked but from the context I draw the conclusion that it means dead or died. And until today I would never have guessed that whacked also means dead. But I must say that I really doubt that Alissa would kill you even though you’ve had your differences.

    • Your English is excellent!

      “Croaked” is a colloquial word for “died,” but “whacked” is more “murdered” (probably comes from the more original meaning of “to whack” which is, essentially, “to hit”). But it’s often used in conjunction with an axe (“he whacked the branch off with an axe”), and I wouldn’t be surprised if the more colloquial use as a synonym for murder originated from a time when people were more likely to kill someone with an axe. For example, there’s the old rhyme about Lizzy Borden, “Lizzy Borden took an axe and gave her mother 40 whacks; when she saw what she had done, she gave her father 41.”

    • I always learn some new words while visiting this website. Thei iPad has a quite handy feature. If you click a word, you the possibility to search for the meaning of that word.
      English isn’t my native tongue too. Mine is Dutch.

    • Don’t get confused, but frog’s also croak.

  3. All this talk of croaking made me think of one of my favourite poems of all time – especially the sung version by Aled Jones…

    Rev Eli Jenkins’ Prayer – Dylan Thomas (from Under Milk Wood)

    Every morning when I wake,
    Dear Lord, a little prayer I make,
    O please do keep Thy lovely eye
    On all poor creatures born to die

    And every evening at sun-down
    I ask a blessing on the town,
    For whether we last the night or no
    I’m sure is always touch-and-go.

    We are not wholly bad or good
    Who live our lives under Milk Wood,
    And Thou, I know, wilt be the first
    To see our best side, not our worst.

    O let us see another day!
    Bless us all this night, I pray,
    And to the sun we all will bow
    And say, good-bye – but just for now!*

    Appropriately enough I copied the poem from a blog called:
    Miserable Old Fart 😄
    Got any Welsh cousins, Patric?

    In case anyone wishes to listen to the Aled Jones version of this poem I have included the only link I could find below. It’s only the first 3 minutes or so of the 30 minute video but I think the rest is also Aled Jones. Enjoy!


  4. I do think they should remove Mrs k from the game as she is dead in the simpsons now.

  5. 1. I’m glad you haven’t croaked, Patric I enjoy reading your posts. Also, I haven’t croaked, although, I’m about 20 years younger, it seems like more people my age are croaking!
    2. My device hasn’t croaked but, keeps giving me warnings that it can’t remember anything new!
    3-4. I see dead yellow people!
    5. Alissa, thank you for not having Patric whacked! I like reading his posts.

  6. I am thankful for this blog and the awesome people who keep it going! Your posts usually make me giggle but this one made me belly laugh. Santa would be proud! Oh, and you can never watch too much Orphan Black…Clone Club Forever!

  7. In Australia we don’t do Thanksgiving; but I particularly like & relate to your item numbers 1 & 2 Patric; As they are applicable to me! Happy Thanksgiving to you & all Americans!
    I’ve heard it’s like our Christmas – when all the family get together & argue. I’m dreading Christmas this year. I always cook & host. My family is really dysfunctional! We’d give The Simpsons a run for their money!

  8. Have about 330 bonuts had planned on using on upcoming sale but Caesar and Mrs Bouvier seem to good to miss. Going to do updated should i buy?

  9. Changing the subject….I just discovered that some thanksgiving specials just showed up in the game. Pow wow casino, piggly wiggly store, etc. doughnut back offers. Etc. check it out.

  10. Would they really kill off a main character in the game? And would it matter since we have ghosts and dead people wandering around town in this non-canon game anyway?

    I’m thankful for all the ways we have to earn donuts these days. Any freemium players who have been playing for years know how rare donuts used to be.

  11. I am thankful for all the little things, like TSTO, that give me pleasure throughout the day.

  12. I assume you mean that nobody got a frog in their throat.

  13. I am setting up my Christmas area, when I got my nativity scene out of inventory , it started a task with the Simpson’s. Anybody else’s doing this??????

  14. Hey, not a cranky posting 🙂
    May the turkey taste great!

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