I hesitated to open up this can of worms again, but the final frames of the this update pushed me over the edge. And while I thought it would be funny to do a “fake news” post about angry TSTO players leaving sheep’s heads at the gates of EA headquarters in San Francisco in protest, I thought better of it. After all…if two major countries can get into a recent preemptive twitter showdown over nuclear power over a fake news article, there is no telling what would happen if I fomented the fires of passion over this less-than-holiday update, and the final poke in the heart thrown out by the EA/Gracie programmers.
Instead, I will simply add a P.S. to the previous “venting letters” I wrote, which allowed you to write “I agree” in response, to get your emotions quelled and back to a “happy place” in the update.
Before I start, I want to re-emphasize that I do not have any issue with the basic concept of “trying something different” as it pertains to a “Winter/Holiday” update. And yes, while there are billions of Christians who lay claim to this time of year by nature of annual credit card debt, it doesn’t mean that the “hundreds of thousands of practising Wiccans around the globe” (according to WIKI) should be ignored.
However, as I will point out in the “P.S.” to EA, there are still limitations to how far we are to be pushed outside the realm of good taste and common sense.
See if you agree with me…
Dear EA,
I’ve tried. I really have. I am a tolerant person, and was more than willing to give your “experiment” (an alternative Winter Update) a chance by looking at the Winter/Holiday season with open eyes and heart. I realize that there are far more cultural traditions than Christianity, and that this time of year is claimed by a large number of faiths and beliefs which find their roots in similar rituals. All good.
I even went so far as to watch the entire “The Nightmare After Krustmus” episode, frame by frame, looking for the inside jokes that made their way into TSTO. Of the roughly 22 minutes of actual animated programming, there was less than 2 minutes dedicated to the “Pagan Festival” on which most of this update was based.
Yes. I’ll admit it. I laughed at a bunch of the quick funny bits, once I froze the frame.
The opening scene when the Reverend calls Springfield a “Good Christian Town” was perfectly timed. We see the $5 antler rental in the foreground.
I chuckled when I saw the “Graven Images while you wait” sign. I’ve never really understood a religion that is so afraid of statues and trinkets…unless it is the fear that they will lose market share on the mass merchandise of crosses, rosaries and saint medals being sold in millions of gift shops around the world.
Dunk the Monk is still on my wish list, although I’ll use a softball rather than a human skull to trigger it. After all…what is this…an Ozzie Osborne concert?
Who doesn’t laugh at Ralph and his Dad getting their tongues stuck in Jack Frosts’s Ice Garden? But the surprise “freeze frame moment” was discovering a Stevie Nicks ice sculpture in the background. Oh Stevie…you make Wicca so sexy…
With the plethora of television shows and series out this year based on Near Death Experiences and coming back from the dead (can anyone please explain the Netflix series “The OA” to me?), nothing says “funny” and ambiguous like “temporary eternity.”
And finally…while it is a pretty violent image, watching Satyr Willie devour the heart of the Devil Snowman has a twinge of silly to it, and is in some small way offers retribution for making us watch 50 years of “Frosty the Snowman” every Christmas. Worst. Christmas. TV. Special. Ever.
But then, you went too far. Yes. I get that you do all sorts of “edgy” stuff during the Halloween episodes. Yes, I realize that the only rule regarding “going too far” in the Simpsons is that you can’t go too far…but, you went too far.
Maggie…dear, sweet, beautiful little Maggie, would never, ever, in a million years, take pleasure in repeatedly cutting the head off of a little lamb, pushing the head back to the body, and then sever it again and again. And no. I don’t buy that it is a “stuffed toy.” There are no tags. No cute button eyes. Just a dead sheep.
Sorry. That is pushing the boundaries of credulity too far!
I mean…Maggie wouldn’t even allow Gerald to squish butterflies! Do you REALLY think that she would take pleasure in cutting the head off of a little lamby?
Yes. I know. She shot Burns. But, it was BURNS for Jebus’ sake! EVERYONE wants to shoot Burns!
I admit it. There were some high points (the Singing Stones), and a couple of funny decorations. But for the most part, this entire update feels like you were forced to do it…under fear of getting sued for discrimination by the lone Wiccan dude in the office.
Was it Rowan? He always gave me the shivers… I mean who wears a sock monkey hat in 80 degree California weather??? Didn’t you see it coming when he left the “Pigeon Pie” in the office fridge for a week, with a label, “do not eat until Solstice” on it?
Yes. I get it. Making fun of him to the point where he may have filed a grievance with H.R. wasn’t exactly the wisest move. But did you have to capitulate by allowing him to plan the WHOLE WINTER EVENT??? Sheesh. Rowan. He brings everyone down with his talk about “Mother Earth” and responsible recycling.
I get it, EA. Rowan had an idea, and he had that letter from HR (which he taped to the office fridge), so you felt like you HAD to let him have his day in the spotlight. But, Maggie. You let him twist up little Maggie…first allowing Rowan to tie her to the top of a pagan tree (aka Christmas tree) in the biting, bitter cold, for hours on end…and then forcing her to dismember a cute little lamb in an animal sacrifice ritual. Shameful.
But, the final, final, final straw??? Once again, telling all of us TSTO players to be happy with whatever you give us…and get over it. Pfffffffffttttttt….. YOU GET OVER IT when we don’t spend donuts on Rowan’s version of Winter/Christmas/Holidays.
Yes. We are a greedy lot this time of year. We want lots of fun, interesting, unique stuff…and we want it all!
OK. So you got us there…
But, to once again INSULT US when we aren’t happy with the weird offerings that Rowan came up with is going too far!!
So, in final summation of how I feel about letting Rowan put Maggie through a virtual hell of ambiguity, when she is just supposed to be hiding to give us free bonuts, I will let her do the talking….
That’s right, EA. Suck!
PS.PS. I can’t wait for the next update!!! Whoohooo!!!!
Respectfully yours,
CrankyOldPatric
Spot on cranky. .. Perfectly worded and echoed by myself. I was so disappointed by this update. I wait all year for the Christmas one because i love this time of year and normally find it to be the best update of the year but not this one. I have invested so much time and money into my town but do feel cheated
I think you have the exact perfect word for how I feel…”cheated”. I was so looking forward to winning the Maggie skin…then, what a disappointment. I can’t believe that EA would knowingly try to alienate it’s customer base, but the alternative would seem to be that the writers are clueless boobs (which I also don’t believe). Someone at EA thought that it was funny? satirical? witty? I don’t believe that either…I think it was simply for shock value. We are becoming a nation of “shock junkies” and the writers at EA are just products of our society. Anything goes if you can get a reaction out of people. “Trending” is everything and attention of any sort is deemed a good thing. They got what they wanted…controversy and attention.
Even Christmas is now fair game…they got us all talking about them…they win. Those of us that just wanted to enjoy a fun game without being manipulated…we lose.
I agree with you and i hope next year is better
You could just simplify the letter to…
Dear EA,
Seriously? Your payoff for this Christmas is Maggie sacrificing a lamb? Come on… really? No EA. Bad EA. Please don’t do that again.
Sincerely,
Us
Brevity…not my strong suit. LOL!
Sharing this letter makes you enormously brave. I’m honestly terrified to share how I feel online.
There is no reason to be afraid of online trolls. Really. They carry about as much weight in the real world as the digital characters they hold so dear. But, that said…I do concerned when people take any of this so seriously. With so many thing going off of the rails in the real world…debating opinions about a game just seems silly.
You are too sweet, thanks for not making fun of me for mistaking brevity for bravery as I read. You truly are brave! And you carry the cheek and shenanigans of a fellow Irishman. I hope you have a happy new year, and I look forward to reading many more of your posts!!!
Thanks much! I’ll keep swinging if you keep slinging (the kind words).
Maybe Im not a big enough addict. When I look at it your way I am surprised that they did that to Maggie. (from your perspective it is very upsetting) When I look at it my way i see a cartoon that put a wiggling little kid in a star suit on a tree lol I see same cartoon Maggie cutting off stuffed animal sheep heads haha. i have not been offended or upset by anything in this Christmas Update other than the fact the prizes were meh. I laughed at a lot of the dialog and enjoyed it for what it is. A game based on a cartoon. I have really enjoyed playing this game and will keep doing so. I did not purchase any donuts this Christmas not because of protest but because there was nothing i had to have. Merry Christmas and happy New Year to all you tappers out there ! 🙂
I am what’s known as a Jew for Jesus. And I had no problem with this update. It’s a game based on fake people for real people to enjoy. As far as I’m concerned Christmas really is a pagan holiday and maybe that’s what makes people most uncomfortable?! But as they say ignorance is bliss. If you don’t feel comfortable performing a quest or task, or if you don’t care for the update don’t play it that is your freedom.
Agreed! (and for the record…most of what I wrote was tongue in cheek. Especially the parts about Roland. He is actually an agnostic, vegan, hipster).
I agree
I liked the Pagan update, tho I wish we had it at a different time (I love me some Christmas lights.)
The Maggie thing is seriously gross tho. Yikes. Poor lamb.
I AGREE. I just hope this wasn’t a visit from the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Also a Christmas Carol themed Christmas event would have been awesome!
Well…in fairness…it was never labeled as such. It has been “Winter 2016” since the beginning.
That was awesome.
I agree
Won’t most people store the thingy that the task uses? I certainly did. 😛
Not sure what else to say but, I agree.
I’m honestly of the opinion that something happened and they had to re-work the Christmas event from scratch, which is why it’s so odd and why it’s only two acts.
I agree! 😁 Wrong post?
Great post though and I definitely agree. It doesn’t feel like Maggie and IMO it wasted a visual task that could have been something a lot less controversial.
At first I thought it was cute and innocent but then I remembered that this is Maggie … No EA! Not angry about it but it just feels a bit wrong
I took the “ingrates” dialog the same way. Some real cocky writers from behind their keyboards.
I stored the sacrifice alter. It just annoyed me in that it seems EA just wanted to say “ok you ingrates! You want star suit Maggie? You cAn have her but you’ll get this disturbing task for Maggie. Take that!”
I agree!
I agree!
I didn’t hate it, but I’m glad it’s over and we still have snow. I enjoyed getting lots of bonuts.
I loved 99.99% of this event. Sheep sacrifice… another item to go into storage with the slaughterhouse. But to have Maggie task there…pushed it too far. And if I recall correctly it was part of quest and had to be done. Full disclosure: I am a vegan humanist.
Ha! Love it Patric. I agree with you totally. You are a man after my own semi- old, 46 years young, cranky heart 💙 👍🏼
Good to find another semi-old cranky person! LOL.
I agree
Based upon the episode, I expected Maggie to chop up the gnome not a lamb.
I agree I actually posted something similar except not so eloquent witty poignantly prose worthy or good. So take these elements away and they are exactly the same.
It is not in Maggies character to do something like this…..Bart maybe Mr Burns definately….so EA need to change it.
It’s completely in character. Way more than shooting Burns there have been many times she’s ranged between violent and Homercidal. When she attacks Homer with the nail gun is a personal favorite.
I can see shooting Homer with a nail gun…but a lamb?? I hope you realize that I was lampooning those who take the game way too seriously. Right? Or…you could just be another “literalist.” It’s a new religion…apparently.
That was directed at someone who was overly offended. I might have put it in the wrong place. I’m still new to yr style of writing but yeah, I got it, grain of salt.
Doesn’t help I have a dead pan sense of humor that doesn’t translate well like my Bush comment.
Maybe if we just killed pans…instead of sheep…the world would be a happier place? And yes…my “brand of humor” takes some getting used to. In short…I don’t take ANYTHING seriously…especially this game. So, we are good, Mo…
I enjoy yr style. And don’t call me Mo, it’s fag to you.
Ok then…
And no not a literalist, they so silly. I never really listen to what anyone says, body language is as important as words mixed with personal experience. There’s only one person I take literally. Orwell.
Well…even Orwell kinda missed his mark by more than 30 years. But, I get it…
Best event ever.
AHA!!!!!!! A “Friend of Roland!”
for whatever reason when I read this it made me lol
I don’t agree, and making a letter attacking a strawman wiccan with an hypothetical discrimination lawsuit makes you look a bit childish.
Come on…seriously? A strawman wiccan????? And as far as “childish,” if that is the worst that is leveled at me for calling Roland out for his silliness, then I guess I’ll have to roll with it. Humor. I’ll just figure that we agree to disagree on what is funny (and for the record, I also made fun of Christian spending habits…guess I should expect a letter from the Pope on that too?).
Speaking of which, I have here in my hands a summons from the Vatican police, for the arrest of “that grumpy young man”. Yes, the Pope is older than you. Anyway, come along quietly (as if!)
Argh!! But, I loves me the new Pope! He is a rabblerouser!
I’ve been playing daily since the whacking day event. I’ve probably missed around 14 days of play time all these years. However, the events now are all the same. I year of virtually the same process of playing. There is no more creativity left. I uninstalled at the beginning of Winter phase 2 and may return another day. I’ll keep an eye on the blog for a worthwhile update. Thank you for all you guys do and have a Happy New Year!
I absolutely agree. When I saw that sheep task for star Maggie I was absolutely disgusted!!! Really poor taste EA
Maybe you’re playing the wrong game.
Again…if you could see the smile on my face when you guys take these posts so seriously… do you really think I am laying awake at night worrying about the game and it’s impact on society? Not so much…
I somehow missed that Maggie can do this. I can’t wait to go and send her on this task. This has been one of my favorite winter events yet. Thanks for pointing it out!
Happy to do so. Gotta find your joy where it is handed to you…right?
It’s definitely a plush toy, but I still don’t like it.