Daily Archives: April 12, 2017

Should I Spend Donuts On the Super Collider, Buckingham Pay-Less Motel or the Knightboat?

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

The spies are invading Springfield!  Yes, the Secret Agent update has hit our games.  We’ve got hacking, drones, dossiers and a shrinking donut bank account because there are LOADS of returning items in our stores just tempting us with those sprinkles!

Of course with that limited-time label it can be tempting to buy everything that looks awesome because it’ll be gone soon.  But don’t sweat it!  That’s where we come in to tell you what’s worth those donuts and what you might want to hold off on.

Wondering if you should add the Super Collider, Buckingham Pay-Less Motel or the Knight Baot to your Springfield?  Well before you hit that confirm button let’s break down the pros and cons of adding these throwbacks to your Springfield (although technically the Knight Boat is not a throwback)…

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Femme Fatale…Just Another Female Designed to Make Me Feel Bad


I want to start this revealing little commentary with a few facts.  I offer these not as a way of excusing my behavior, but perhaps helping to explain it in some small way that may not invoke your empathy, but at least a nod of understanding, as in “Oh…now that makes sense. He’s nuts…but at least I get it now.”

  1.  I have five daughters and a wife (plus three sisters and a mom, two sisters-in-law, and three nieces) who are all very strong willed, successful, women deserving of praise.
  2. After my Dad’s passing in 2012, I am the lone male in a world dominated by said women.
  3. I was/am the lone receiver of Testosterone from my Dad, and perhaps got a “double shot” that makes me a “highly sexed man” (as my wife likes to say with a wink) but also, as a father to five daughters (penance for being highly sexed?) realizes that being “too macho” will likely make relationships with said family females miserable, if not impossible.
  4. I don’t have a large group of male friends with whom I regularly gather to do manly things (watch sports, smoke cigars, talk about female body parts in a loud, irreverent way) for the same reasons stated above. I go on a couple of golf weekends with “the boys” each year, but mostly spend it being offended by the idiot behavior of my friends (all of whom I don’t let within miles of my wife or daughters).
  5. Having 5 daughters…with an age range of 41-26, makes it almost impossible to look at ANY woman lustfully, under the age of 48 (because a 15-year gap is just creepy…and waaaaaaaay to close to the age of my oldest daughter).

So…taking that into consideration…you might see why I have been reduced to lusting after cartoon characters in TSTO.  I’m not proud of it. But, hey…a “highly sexed man” has to have an outlet somewhere…right? (and please…refrain from any “tapping” innuendo jokes).
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Should I Spend Donuts On Femme Fetale?

Hey Howdy Hey Tappers!

The spies are invading Springfield!  Yes, the Secret Agent update has hit our games.  We’ve got hacking, drones, dossiers and a shrinking donut bank account because there are LOADS of spy items in our stores just tempting us with those sprinkles!

Of course with that limited-time label it can be tempting to buy everything that looks awesome because it’ll be gone soon.  But don’t sweat it!  That’s where we come in to tell you what’s worth those donuts and what you might want to hold off on.

Wondering if you should add Femme Fatale to your Springfield?  Well before you hit that confirm button let’s break down the pros and cons of adding this 50s Secret Spy to your Springfield…

Continue reading