Diary of a Wookiee: GO TEAM BLUE!!!

“No score and over a week ago, our programmers brought forth on this game a new update, conceived in Easter, and dedicated to the proposition that all tappers are created “equal”.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether these tappers, or any game so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war….”

Thanks Abe but I think your Gettysburg Address was better the original way.  Why is President Lincoln bending words today in a dairy by a fuzzball?  Well simple, because he can and also because it’s time to throw down the gauntlet…

GO TEAM BLUE!!!

Reader and hilarious guy Cybersilly started the idea for this post with a comment on one of my origin posts.  He responded to my first Team Blue comment with this little diatribe…

“LOL………..Oh it’s on! Where are my Pink Warriors! Are we going let Mr. Flea Trap and his merry band of bluesers disparage the proud Pink Community. Are we going to let them mock our traditions and belittle our ideas we have held in such esteem since the dawn of Tuesday. I say noooo, dear friends. Remember our motto:

PINKS THINK WHILE BLUES SNOOZE!”

Oh, it’s on is it?  Well in the spirit of this silly little game and inspired by some advice from Lincoln that a game divided cannot stand, or something like that, I declare an open season of buffoonery to unite both sides to the one great nation of tappers we used to be.  The easiest way to do it?  Civil war of course… Blue vs. Pink.  (NOTE: the emphasis is on the civility of my intentions lol, play nice)

While no leader, I have been appointed by the 16^th POTUS to be a “commanding” general in the Blue Egg Army.

I am the Wookiee. And I see a whole army of my fellow blue warriors, here in defiance of tyranny! You have come to fight as blue. And BLUE you are! What will you do without the freedom from pink? Will you fight with jokes?

Yes!  Joke and they may joke back. Run and you will avoid taunts for a while. And tapping in your bed many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance, to come back here as a blue warrior and tell the pinkies that they may take our eggs but they will never take OUR FREEDOM!

Even though large tracts of TSTO and many tappers old and new have fallen or may fall into the grip of the Pink and all the odious apparatus of Pinky rule, we shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Springfield, we shall fight on the Squidport and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength with our skyfingers, we shall defend our Blueness, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing zones, we shall fight in the carrot fields and in the streets with no cars, we shall fight on the Springfield Sign hill; we shall never surrender.

Can we forge against these enemies a grand and global alliance, Blue and Pink, that can assure a more fruitful tapping experience for all tapperkind? Will you join in that historic effort?

In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been granted the role of defending the Blue in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shrink from this responsibility — I welcome it. I do not believe that any of us would exchange places with the pink or any other color. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavor will light our TSTO and all who serve it — and the glow from that fire can truly light the world.

And so, my fellow team blue tappers: ask not what your game can do for you — ask what you can do for your game.

Warrrrrrrriors… come out to play-ay.

Indeed my dear Cybersilly, it is on and consider the ON-ness broughten.  I have the utmost faith that my azure compatriots are up to the task of defending our blueness and that through our efforts of hilarity and tappery, we shall unite TSTO under the blue flag.  I deny any claims that this is all happenstance and coding and not something more sinister.

For my blue army, while I cannot guarantee you prizes or love or glory… I guarantee free oxygen to every man or woman rallying to our cause.  Consider the venerable blue warriors before you like Huckleberry Hound, J.P. Sullivan, Neytiri, Nightcrawler, The Beast, Abe Sapien, Dr. Manhattan, Mystique, The Genie, Gonzo the Great, The Smurfs and Cookie Monster.  It is our destiny to be the predominant team in TSTO and Victory awaits…

TTFN… Wookiee out!

P.S. Marge’s hair is blue.  How can we be wrong?